very depressed and scared

[Saldav]

The last few months have been very deppressing for me for no real apparent reason, besides financial problems. I have no type of motivation, I find it almost impossible to get up in the morning, I have no job and I feel worthless. I get a combination on anxiety and depression at the same time, I'm really scared and can't hardly even talk or explain myself. I just need positive reassurance that I'm going to be ok. Please if anyone can help me figure out what's going on in my head please help me, thank you in advance and god bless you all. My email is [email protected]. any advise will be greatly appreciated. I'm a 36 yr old man strong and healthy but my mind is totally the opposite I'm very overwhelmed. Please help!

[Enduronman]

I have no job, no income, but that doesn't make the man..we'll get you through bruh! The mind can be built strong too...

E-Man.

[Saldav]

E-man what do I do? My parents tell me to leave it all in the hands of god and he will help me through everything. But I'm confused all I do is lay here in my room freaking out just waiting for the day to end so I could sleep. My life can not consist of just laying here feeling like I'm losing my mind, I have 3boys that I love to death and I don't even interact with them. Sometimes I wish I was dead but I know that's not the answer to anything.

[Enduronman]

DO as I do friend. Just accept the fact that this is merely a bump in the road of life, and isn't your destiny. Then, when you get up enough strength and courage to direct the strengths and the power of the man that you are, focus that energy on those 3 boys and visit them, spend time with them,.just interact or talk to them. It is your destiny, to show them and teach them what it is that you want for them to be, know, grow, learn, and experience. Is what you're doing now what you want them to see?....
Dig deep, think about that for a minute, gather up your thoughts and point it into a positive direction and teach the kids how to be truly powerful. They want to know you bruh...
One more thing, a job will come if you search for that job because you've got heart..it's just wrapped up in some sort of sorrow at the moment. So, rip it outta there and go do something small, anything, go ask the gf or wife or their mother what they want you to do, to be helpful and you'll see that with that effort of trying to help someone else...it also helps you bro.
And by the way, death isn't the way out because you're far from being a selfish coward..I don't see that in you man.

Just small steps, small efforts, and not a fix all in (1) day. Patience with yourself and with others friend.

That's just some things that maybe you should think about doing, but there are many others that'll come to you once you get yourself going...

E-Man.

[trinidiva]

You have to start to focus your energy on the positive things in your life. Even if the things are very small things. You have good health. Be so very thankful for that. Yesterday a 35 year old friend of mine with a beautiful soul and spirit and six kids, was buried. She died of breast cancer. So every time you wake up in the morning...just say thank you. Be thankful that you have three wonderful kids and that you can spend time with them. You dont have to do anything that cost money either. Just toss the ball around with them or go for a walk or watch a holiday movie with them. Those are the things they remember and you will find that it will distract you from thinking about your problems.
Like Eman said you don't have to tackle everything all in one day either. A little bit at a time. Hang in there.

[Cullingford]

Hi ya I have 3 boys too ,there were nights when I went to sleep I would pray that I wouldnt wake up again, but things have got so much better and they will do for you my friend. As Trinidiva says just do a bit at a time , sometimes I cant bare the noise mine are making and I do something else for a while.

[JustAnotherMe]

Hey Saldav,

Thank you for sharing. I can relate to what you're going through at the moment, it's worse when you can't really explain why you are feeling. I mean if X was the obvious cause then fair enough, solve X by doing Y and all funky. Sorted. If only live was so simple..

There is no easy solution. You need to build momentum, at the moment it's all negative momentum. Be realistic, this is not going to be fixed overnight but every small step in the right direct makes the next step easier.

Choose something small and achievable. If you're having trouble motivating for anything then choose the easiest of things. If you're a slob at the moment (I am!!) make your bed first thing, every single day. Sounds absolutely ridiculous, I genuinely scoffed when I first heard that idea, but it works. That feeling of accomplishing something, first thing, sets a precedent for your day. After that is the norm you might go for a 10 minute walk every day. Soon you will catch yourself enjoying a particularly warm breeze and realize you've achieving small moments of happiness. Yes, you may still feel like shit a lot of the time. But you're walking in the right direction. And slowly but surely you will turn things around.

Be realistic. But be proactive. One step at a time mate. One step at a time.

[Saldav]

Thank you guys, I need positive comments. It's not easy but I guess one step at a time. I'll try my hardest! Anymore help will be greatly appreciated.

[trinidiva]

Thank you guys, I need positive comments. It's not easy but I guess one step at a time. I'll try my hardest! Anymore help will be greatly appreciated.

So, what is one thing you can say that you are thankful for today?

I'm thankful that I had a mostly anxiety free day and had a great day with my kids. I took them to see Santa.

[Ponder]

"Leave it in the hands of God ..." That's akin to "she'll be right, second coming is any day now."
My parents did that with my Brother, and my mother always runs away from a conversation telling me to leave it in God's hands. With out fail, I can tell how every conversation I have with my mother is going to in up in God's Hands.

On a positive Note - I don't believe in God, so unlike my mothers filing away method - I am left to deal with my problems as they arise.