Searching for anything good...(sigh)

[Im-Suffering]

Hey John, happy holidays

[JohnC]

Hey John, happy holidays

same to you Marc

[AliasEQ]

I just remembered something really funny, thought I'd share it here. Remember when Eman went off the forums, because his internet went down or something and Jessed started this myth that Eman was a pedophile irl. And almost everyone believed it. I don't know, I just randomly thought of that lol. Gave me a good laugh haha

Hope life is going better for you Chip! How's the puppy doing? Although, I'd imagine he's not a puppy anymore.

Also, to cheer you up:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0ghh5yXlEaw

Starts at 4:25

[NixonRulz]

I guess Eman is taking longer than expected to find something good since he has been AWOL after the big announcement

[Enduronman]

I have literally been asleep since Thanksgiving. The medication that I had taken for over 5 YEARS no longer worked to keep me awake since this other medicine that the Doc stuck on my back.

TODAY, I am finally awake and it's the friggin 14th of December. Unreal. I had to move over to another medication to try to get me up. It works, like a Champ! I haven't been up this long in weeks. Actually got to write my daughter a letter in jail, wrote another letter to a friend, and even tried to straighten up this room too. I think that this new medication is going to be my only real option, although I never wanted to go to this one. Oh well..things that we don't want or want to do happen ALL the time. I am just glad, to finally, be awake.

My Son is coming up in a few days, going to Christmas somewhere that I don't really want to but, as she placed her demand that my Dad and I attend, I placed my demand. A copy of her Will to assure that I own the home, cars, boats, and millions too. She said, "Ok"...I told my Doc that and she said that you just treated her the same way that she treated you and your kids, and she thought that was Ok?.. Yep. So, I am going to celebrate Christmas with my kids that aren't locked up, my Dad, a new friend, and also make it worth my while and get what I want too. My Insurance Policy that states, all her crap is mine. May has well treat selfishness, with selfishness I always say! YAY!!!

Everything else is going good. Going to actually see (2) MD's as ordered by the Social Security Admin at the beginning of the New Year too. So, it looks like EVERYTHING is working in my favor now. It's about time for it too!! I've been through enough bullshit, lost everything, and it is now time to rebuild, repair, restore my Life and I'm going to make it WAY WAY better then it was. It's really nice to lose certain things, and certain people too even though I couldn't see it at first. Now, I do. I see, feel, sense, that my Life will be stronger, better, happier, more secure, with little to no drama and stresses in it at all. Thank GOD..

Listening to some of my favorite tunes now too, what more does one really need in Life?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y2jdtvzUPG0


E-Man

[Enduronman]

I actually got a lot done I think. Wrote four letters, chatted with numerous friends, was able to stay awake and I'm just now tired so this new med seems to be the perfect fit for me so far. Hell, I may even try to go to the range, mall, ride, practice up with the bow tomorrow.

One of the letters was a demanded response from my daughter in jail. She asked if I had read her letters? Yes, but I had no idea that she had SO many questions to attend too. So, I did. Not real sure why one of the questions was as to whether she could have a 4 x 4 truck though? She really tried to sell it in the letter though! I already have 2 trucks, and we will have a 4 x 4 Jeep, and 6 other cars too so I'm not real sure about that one. Then she asked if she could have a dog too when we eventually move? She has NEVER taken care of (1) animal that she's ever been given so I just voted for a cat instead. She will NOT clean up dog crap all over the yard anyway. She has always talked about wanting a big GIANT Ford truck but, I think we have time to figure that one out. She won't be out for awhile. And, she already has her "Dream Car" which was a 2000 Honda Accord 2 dr V6 200HP sitting out there that she's never driven. Kids, are funny, when they aren't lying..BAAHHAAHA!! She has NEVER spoken words, vocally, to my face, that were all just made up lies, but I do recall someones child as doing that I just can't remember the exact situation. It's all gone, the memories, the event, I just recall being asked 13 times if you're calling my son a liar now, and saying yes 13 times, and then hearing the proof, fact, clarification, and validity of the Complete 7 Month Long Lie...LOL!!! I better quit typing because I have disposed of the rest, and buried it where it need be. 6' under.

Anyway, yes. What A Wonderful Life. I received my Christmas gift and blessing 2 months early. But, I still Celebrate it every, single, day. And, I will Celebrate that gift this Christmas as well. In a sense, I am a very, very happy man. Although, pain, suffering, misery aren't out of the question at times. It's a much different "kind" of misery now. The kind, that a pill will fix. NOTHING could have ever fixed the other ones. Except, to delete, erase, forget, bury, learn from the mistake, and move on in an actual forward direction. Something, I had not been able to do for a decade. Moving forward, is wonderful all in itself.

Hopes that everyone has a great day today!

Many blessings,
E-Man

[Enduronman]

Up and about, and able to stay awake. This is awesome! I may have slept for 4 hours or so, but there are others out there that do that nightly. Plus, I've slept since Nov 17th until yesterday anyway so I think I'm pretty well rested. LOL!!

Plan to do some more writing, ride the scooter as long as it isn't freezing and 60mph winds. Maybe shoot the bow for awhile too. Can't wait until my Son finally makes it up here. Last time he was here, where was I? Yep, asleep and could not wake up. Hell the Sheriff's even came in to take Chloe away too. NO MORE of that!

One thing, I will not be sitting in this chair for long. It killed my spine last night after about 5 hours. So, planning a trip to the Orthopedic Surgeon in the New Year. I can't deal with that, for the rest of my life. And I even have some (Fentanyl) patch on my spine too. Herniated disc apparently do NOT ever heal themselves. They would have in 4 months of laying down.

I hope that everyone has a wonderful day, and finds something good in it too.

The day, is what we make it I suppose.

E-Man

[Enduronman]

Not a bad day. Until, I tried to start my scooter. Kicked it 30 times, thought that Death was near. So, I gave up on that idea.

Wrote my daughter another letter. The letter, impacted me. It was about "friends". I had 4 good, close, friends and 2 of them I had known for over 25 years. I now have 1 close friend left, because the 3 others, chose to be (selfish). I always went out of my way for them, but, when it was time for them to go out of their way for me? They said the wrong things, did the wrong things, and I haven't spoken to any of them since. It REALLY made me wonder about (people) in General and the fact that selfish people, really don't even KNOW that they're selfish. But, I DO KNOW when I am. Another thing that sucks about being a "sensitive person" is that we actually care about other people. WE pay, selfish people, do not. They could care less. I even wasted the last 10 years of my life with a person that was just like that too. To stupid to even know when they were being selfish, insensitive, inconsiderate at all. Quite honestly, the most Well Educated, Stupid Person that I have ever met or known in my life. In school until age 26, but a Complete Idiot in all regards. Yes, the letter is still impacting me. But, at least this year at Christmas I will NOT be interrogated about a Christmas gift to anyone, as that person did last year. Sure her daughter was smoking pot, and trying to have sex, and lie, and all of the things that her Mother NEVER did, but to take that out on me was literally f***** up. Made me feel like shit, at Christmas. Man, am I glad that the Train Wreck of a woman is finally gone, and gone for good too. I do not miss her stanky ass feet either, trust me.

I did make it outside to shoot the bow for awhile, just for something to do. Wrapped a couple presents. Spoke to my daughter too. So, I guess today will do just fine. Looking forward to actually being able to stay awake and visit with my 6'4" 16 year old Son for Christmas too. This will be the 2nd time I've seen him. I seemed to have missed the entire time from him being 4'3" to now. Its weird to look up at him. He is a great boy though so this will be a great Holiday too. With NO stresses caused by selfish dumbasses also. HOORAY!!!

Going to do some more writing. Writing, is extremely helpful to get things off of my mind. Clear out all the bad, in with the good. Memories.

Blessings!

E-Man...

[cloudy black]

yes people suck at times it does seem to be a one way street!! i used to look after my friends pets at mostly short notice but when it came to looking after my cat that i had at the time, oh they were all way too busy, oh fish tales to it. yes we sensitive people can get taken for a ride.

but i wont let people play mind games with me, on the flip side, and maybe that's why i don't have any friends!! i sure don't need the hassle!!

well its great that your 6'4" tall lad is coming to visit you that's good he can put the decs up without the need of a ladder!!!

[Enduronman]

Yes, exactly. People that are born to be sensitive, considerate, and selfless, are the very people that fill these pages in this Forum. There are NO insensitive people here. That's what anxiety is. And, it truly is those of us that actually care about people, that get taken for the ride, ignored, and treated with selfishness.

I am going to play "role reversal" this New Year. And, treat everyone that I see, encounter, come into contact with, insensitivity. I think that it will build a very, very powerful mind to be able to play both roles. However, I will and still do feel sorry for those that were not gifted, blessed, and given, sensitivity.

Now, its supposed to be nearly 60 degrees here today so this is the day that I will try to get outside although my legs are killing me from trying to start that damn scooter yesterday when it was 38! HAAHA!! Its weird to even be seeing temps like this around here in December and so close to Christmas. But, may has well take advantage of it.

Have a great day!

E-Man