Ativan, Should I speak to my doctor about a permanent prescription.

[15514784]

First off I am diagnosed with Panic Disorder (unmedicated)

Two days ago my father and I were taking my grandma to the hospital because we thought she had the flu and was very weak, while we were walking her to the van she collapsed and died in our arms. We got her to the hospital, she was revived, and put on life support until my family could visit her, after they took her off life support for the first time in my life I saw my dad cry. That was the last I can remember, until I woke up in a hospital bed.

The doctor told me that with my disorder, and the emotional burden of my grandmothers death caused my BP to rise to 246/198 and my Pulse to 201, and was given 3mg of Ativan through injection and was given a one week prescription of 7(1mg) tablets.

I didn't think I'd need my prescription, so I haven't taken it until 45 minutes ago, but over the last few days I've felt like a zombie. Not zombie as in no energy/motivation, but more as just like no emotions what-so-ever. I don't feel happy, sad, angry, worried, or afraid. But last night, and this morning I've been experiencing panic attacks for multiple hours at a time, but not my usual panic attacks, just the pain associated with them (chest pain, difficulty breathing, loss of feelings in limbs, accompanied by an extremely light headedness).

The pain associated with the attacks has gone away, and my brain feels completely empty, similar to how I felt a couple hours after waking up in the hospital.

My question is, should I speak to my doctor about getting a prescription permanently, or do you think this will just be part of the grieving process, and a weeks worth of medication will be enough?

[tailspin]

I am so incredibly sorry you had this experience! I can't imagine how stressful this must have been for you. I'm very sorry for the loss of your grandma and for the traumatic circumstances of her passing.

Am I right in thinking that you already had Panic Disorder before this happened? Grieving is a very complex and painful process, but I don't believe that everyone who grieves needs medication. However, if the person is already dealing with a mood disorder, that can make meds necessary sometimes. Rather than Ativan, perhaps you could talk to your doctor about an anti-depressant? Anti-depressants can be very helpful in the treatment of Panic Disorder. Also, if they are working properly, they don't numb your feelings or make you feel like a zombie. It would be great if your doctor could refer you to a psychiatrist to discuss medication options. A psychiatrist is also better qualified to advise you about Ativan usage.

Grief counseling is also very helpful. Is this something you could look into?

Wishing you the very best!

[Perses]

I'm sorry to hear of your grandmother's loss. It sounds extremely traumatic, and so it is no wonder that you are feeling rather miserable and empty inside. There's a great poem by Emily Dickinson which I think describes what happens when we feel overwhelmed:

After great pain, a formal feeling comes –
The Nerves sit ceremonious, like Tombs –
The stiff Heart questions ‘was it He, that bore,’
And ‘Yesterday, or Centuries before’?


The Feet, mechanical, go round –
A Wooden way
Of Ground, or Air, or Ought –
Regardless grown,
A Quartz contentment, like a stone –


This is the Hour of Lead –
Remembered, if outlived,
As Freezing persons, recollect the Snow –
First – Chill – then Stupor – then the letting go –

Wonderfully descriptive of grief.

It seems to me that you are experiencing profound despair which would be better served by an anti-depressant. Your high BP might be corrected by propranolol which is a beta-blocker that works on the physical effects of anxiety. A couple of suggestions I would have: write down your experiences in a diary dedicated to your grandma, send her a letter so to speak describing how you feel. It's a good thing, as well, that your dad cried. He clearly loves his mom. I cried when my dad died and was an emotional wreck. Try to be a comfort to your dad, and talk to him and whomever else you can. Or not, if you feel you aren't able to yet. Your grandmother is beyond suffering now. It sounds like she was much loved; she has completed her life, and I'm sure she would want you to carry on.

So, bottom line: grief can take many months. Try an anti-depressant or a beta-blocker, because I think that the Ativan might just make you feel sleepy. No, you don't need a permanent prescription.

[tailspin]

Beautiful post, Perses!! Thanks for the wonderful poem too. I really like Emily Dickinson.

[15514784]

Well so far the Ativan has been greatly helping me fall and stay asleep, but I feel as if my medication for ADHD had completely stopped working, I'm going to visit my doctor in a week for a follow up on the situation to see if anything further needs to be done.

[15514784]

I'm so glad I chose to join this forum, all of the help and support I receive from it is so fantastic, thank you everyone.

[tailspin]

Great to hear that the Ativan is helping you sleep. That is so important. Please do continue to let us know how you are doing, and how you get on with your doctor next week. Best of luck to you!

[alankay]

A part is likely the grief and stress/upset of it all but have you seen a therapist yet to talk? I took ativan(1 - 1.5 mgs a few times a week) for over 3 years for PD and thought it was an excellent med for that(as well as anxiety in general). Before thinking of a regular dose of ativan try a daily ssri to help lower your anxiety as well as talking over all you lives story and your anxiety with a therapist. For now an occasional dose of ativan might be fine. Even talking with a Lic. Clinical Social Worker would be good. Alankay

[JustaGal]

A part is likely the grief and stress/upset of it all but have you seen a therapist yet to talk? I took ativan(1 - 1.5 mgs a few times a week) for over 3 years for PD and thought it was an excellent med for that(as well as anxiety in general). Before thinking of a regular dose of ativan try a daily ssri to help lower your anxiety as well as talking over all you lives story and your anxiety with a therapist. For now an occasional dose of ativan might be fine. Even talking with a Lic. Clinical Social Worker would be good. Alankay

Hi Alankay,

Are you still taking Ativan? Just wondering if you came off it. I am not having big anxiety attacks right now, my SSRI kicked in. But I do find great relief from half of .05 when I have nagging anxiety. I know about the withdrawal/addiction concern. It has been about three months for me.