Welcome to the Anxiety Forum - A Home for Those with Anxiety, Fear, or Panic Attacks.
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  1. #1

    I don't want to leave the house anymore.

    Whenever I socialize with anyone outside of my few "comfort zone" people, my mind stays in overdrive, and it's exhausting. I can't just relax and have fun with people; I have to constantly be on my toes. It's strange because in high school, I was so comfortable with everyone.. but I'm now realizing that since it was a forced social environment, and there was a butt-load of stimuli, I never felt any pressure. But now, it's all different. Relationships with people are becoming real, and it scares me because I have nothing to hide behind. I've just had so many bad experiences where I've just wanted to run away from a situation but couldn't.. I have one bad thought and then suddenly, I'm spiraling into a panic attack.
    It's even more frustrating because I'm a musician and people want to make music with me, but I avoid the fuck out of it because music is so personal to me.. and I know I'll be uncomfortable the whole time.
    That being said, alcohol is slowly becoming something I rely on for social interaction.. and I do not want that.
    I know that my anxiety is mostly psychological, and I have know idea how to begin tackling it.
    anyone?

  2. #2
    http://www.anxiety.org/anxiety-news/...e-singer-adele

    Adele has the same issue. Read the article from the link I posted above- it's really interesting. My favorite part:
    “I’m scared of audiences,” she said. “One show in Amsterdam I was so nervous, I escaped out the fire exit. I’ve thrown up a couple of times. Once in Brussels, I projectile vomited on someone. I just gotta bear it. But I don’t like touring. I have anxiety attacks a lot.”

    You're in good company, lady.
    "Every chance that you get is a chance you seize."
    http://anxietymyoldfriend.wordpress.com/

  3. #3
    Senior Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2013
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    6,877
    I adopt the attitude, that its more an issue for others, than it is for me. I enjoy staying at home and doing what makes me happy. Each time I go out, I attempt to embrace the challenge and or own the situation by aiming to find a quiet place that I can do whatever in.

    The more I accept myself, the more able I am to prepare making my own space outside my house. Create your own comfort zones, by making them comfortable. For me, this typically involves a small backpack with a little food and plenty of water. Maybe some reading material _ podcasts - and a few other distractions if needed. I only ever go out aimlessly in the moment if its quiet, otherwise I need a point of focus in order to deal with others as they typically be.

    Quite the subject this be. I can relate to many of the symptoms being under the pressure outside around others. No doubt different sensitivities for different people. Peers, Age, Appearances, Health, Status and all that Atypical BS.

    Focus more on what triggers rather than the side effects. Have a plan and so on. Above all, I find the emphasis placed on socializing over rated and over prescribed. It has its place, but the NEED people place on it imo, feeds the self loathing others typically place on those struggling to find space wherever that may be.

    I tend to go places I enjoy ... I only go outside the comfort zone when I know its helping ... not blindly for the amusement of others.

    Just my thoughts.
    "...the cost of sanity in this society is a certain level of alienation" ~ Terrance McKenna → https://pondermovedhere.blogspot.com/

  4. #4
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Location
    Singapore
    Posts
    13
    Its all a matter of balance, be sure to have your alone time after or in between those times when you do go out to meet people. I know how it feels to be tired. But we live in a society together.

  5. #5
    Junior Member
    Join Date
    Jan 2015
    Location
    United States
    Posts
    16
    You may be what is called an 'introvert.' While an extroverted person draws energy from being around people, introverts are the exact opposite. Being with anyone drains their energy considerably because others are drawing it from them, until you become tired, angry, irritable, panicky, or all of the above. I agree with gauth1234. It's important to give yourself alone time every day. I have to have at least a couple of hours to myself or I get really irritable and tired.

  6. #6
    Hi Hallie, I can see myself in your situation 10 years ago. I was so used to being alone that I can't see myself being with someone that I can share my thoughts with, because I'm so afraid that they might discover ugly about me. So, as a result I had never have a boyfriend/girlfriend since I was 18 yrs old. I tend to avoid someone whenever I feel that they kinda become close to me. But deep inside I wanna experience what other people experience especially on relationships. So what I did was I made a fake account on an online dating game and I had my first girlfriend. It's funny because it was that time that I confirmed that I preferred girls over boys.

 

 

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