New to this and at my lowest.

Ok so I suffer from Generalised Anxiety Disorder
I'm 20 years old and this is hell
I recently moved in with my boyfriend who I love like mad, but I can't seem to stop pushing him away, I'm such a dick.
All I can think about it getting a job sorted and being able to pay bills etc, where we will get money from but the thing is we're living in my mums flat, we're rent free for 2 months and can easily afford food.
We plan to move to the Isle of Wight but I'm so worried about that and I thought moving here would help me feel better, it didn't.
I have been offered Beta Blockers to help with the anxiety but I have a terrible fear of gaining weight and I have been warned they could cause that, which would do more harm than good.
I joined this because I'm on the verge of losing my partner, which I can't bare to think about.
I have tried counselling in the past and I've always just felt patronised and talked down to so I figured this was a good way to avoid that, I need help and this is the first time I'm admitting this.

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Originally Posted by LucyLuck

Ok so I suffer from Generalised Anxiety Disorder
I'm 20 years old and this is hell
I recently moved in with my boyfriend who I love like mad, but I can't seem to stop pushing him away, I'm such a dick.
All I can think about it getting a job sorted and being able to pay bills etc, where we will get money from but the thing is we're living in my mums flat, we're rent free for 2 months and can easily afford food.
We plan to move to the Isle of Wight but I'm so worried about that and I thought moving here would help me feel better, it didn't.
I have been offered Beta Blockers to help with the anxiety but I have a terrible fear of gaining weight and I have been warned they could cause that, which would do more harm than good.
I joined this because I'm on the verge of losing my partner, which I can't bare to think about.
I have tried counselling in the past and I've always just felt patronised and talked down to so I figured this was a good way to avoid that, I need help and this is the first time I'm admitting this.

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This feels so familiar to me. Don't worry though, you will be just fine. The problem is that you put so much pressure on yourself and you want to take on everything. Sometimes it helps to share the burden, talk about your feelings with your partner (he will be more understanding than you think). Also you shouldn't feel guilty or bad about the way you feel. And most of all, believe in yourself and your own capabilities.

Welcome to the forum Lucy:)

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Originally Posted by Kixxi

This feels so familiar to me. Don't worry though, you will be just fine. The problem is that you put so much pressure on yourself and you want to take on everything. Sometimes it helps to share the burden, talk about your feelings with your partner (he will be more understanding than you think). Also you shouldn't feel guilty or bad about the way you feel. And most of all, believe in yourself and your own capabilities.

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I wouldn't wish this on anyone, but it's good knowing I'm not the only one.

Lucy beta blockers do not cause weight gain. People tend to gain weight when they are on AD but mainly cause they have anxiety under control, they relax and eat more:)

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Originally Posted by Dahila

Lucy beta blockers do not cause weight gain. People tend to gain weight when they are on AD but mainly cause they have anxiety under control, they relax and eat more:)

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I hear they cause your metabolism to slow down, I hate my weight anyway I couldn't handle any gain, the happier I am the less I eat

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Originally Posted by LucyLuck

I hear they cause your metabolism to slow down, I hate my weight anyway I couldn't handle any gain, the happier I am the less I eat

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If it's any help, I lost 4st while on meds. So it won't be uncontrollable.

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Originally Posted by Kixxi

If it's any help, I lost 4st while on meds. So it won't be uncontrollable.

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What were you on? If you don't mind my asking

Hi Lucy and everyone.

I am also new to this forum but not this style of psycho-socio support.

Lucy, I presume this is your first time living with someone and on its own is a stressor. I have found what helps most with my anxiety is talking about it. Have you told your bf about this and how you are feeling? I am sure he wants nothing but to help you and together maybe you come up with something.

Another thing I would recommend is to stay away from meds and approach this with clean, soberish mind; I know stress can make one feel not like oneself.

You also mentioned you are worried about gaining weight. Are you eating well? My worst episodes/attacks come when I have not been minding my diet or haven't been eating period. Little snacks like blueberries, pumpkin seeds, and whole grains have shown to help with anxiety and depression.

No matter what we are here for you. Cheers and good luck.

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Originally Posted by Single_Dad

Hi Lucy and everyone.

I am also new to this forum but not this style of psycho-socio support.

Lucy, I presume this is your first time living with someone and on its own is a stressor. I have found what helps most with my anxiety is talking about it. Have you told your bf about this and how you are feeling? I am sure he wants nothing but to help you and together maybe you come up with something.

Another thing I would recommend is to stay away from meds and approach this with clean, soberish mind; I know stress can make one feel not like oneself.

You also mentioned you are worried about gaining weight. Are you eating well? My worst episodes/attacks come when I have not been minding my diet or haven't been eating period. Little snacks like blueberries, pumpkin seeds, and whole grains have shown to help with anxiety and depression.

No matter what we are here for you. Cheers and good luck.

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I'm recovering from an eating disorder so eating right has never been something I have put first, I've tried going at this without meds and it's been 3 years now since this started (although the eating disorder has been 8) I'm starting to feel weak and I think it's time to try a new approach, I don't want to medicate, I don't want to change myself with chemicals.
My partner does try to help a lot, he's marvellous but I like that this is here as he doesn't quite understand.

Oh Lucy now I understand..............

I wish I could help with your diet or offer advice. My wee belly prevents me from eating often; I've got acid reflux or something too. Have you tried forums for eating disorders as well? Still, you seem to have a good idea what is going on with you but you need to figure out why. It's awesome you want to keep away from meds since it seems at least half the Western world's population is looking for some excuse to get drugs. Have you tried meditation and other holistic healing? Also make time everyday to do something nice for yourself. Hang in there; you can do it!

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Originally Posted by Single_Dad

I wish I could help with your diet or offer advice. My wee belly prevents me from eating often; I've got acid reflux or something too. Have you tried forums for eating disorders as well? Still, you seem to have a good idea what is going on with you but you need to figure out why. It's awesome you want to keep away from meds since it seems at least half the Western world's population is looking for some excuse to get drugs. Have you tried meditation and other holistic healing? Also make time everyday to do something nice for yourself. Hang in there; you can do it!

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I have tried eating disorder forums but I find them very triggering, my outlook atm is it can't get worse

I had/have a problem self-medicating with alcohol and I find AA meetings and stuff do more harm than good too. I am really liking these anxiety/stress rooms since, as you noted, people here are a bit more understanding and helpful than those who don't suffer from this crap. Well, that is one good thing about rock bottom -- no where to go but up!