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Really good information up there. Sometimes I get discouraged with meditation. Getting frustrated and mad because I'm not getting the desired results seems to be counterproductive. I think it should feel natural and a relaxing experience or maybe best to just try relaxing the mind and letting go of (dismissing) the nagging intrusive thoughts.
At the moment I'm able to meditate with a high degree of effort. My negativity keeps compounding, however, and that's the current hang. I have trouble forgiving myself, so I try to wilfully concentrate harder and harder, shortcircuiting the process. I'll have to cultivate a lot of positivity and take a VERY easygoing attitude if I'm to make progress here. A secondary problem is that I get a lot of back pain and end up breathing far too heavily. I've been scrutinizing my shortness of breath thing, and I'm not sure how much of it's an overabundance of cortisol, and how much of it's manually tampering with the breath, causing more harm than good.