i wasn't strong enough .. i hate myself even more now .. so sad .. she is so lovely .. now she hates me .. she has asked me to leave her alone and never see her again .. i just hope that in time she could forgive my bad behaviour .. i think I have pushed too much now.. where do i go from here?
i have my heart on my sleeve, I am the first to accept my faults .. I have been having cognitive therapy for over 6 months, various prescriptions from the doctor. even tried talking to a priest .. perhaps I will be like this forever and never to be able to trust. I'm a good person with a good heart and I just don't know why I am having to live like this … its horrible .. i'm just in shock now .. feel nothing
Shit!!!
You have got to get her into your therapy session asap! Not meet up before, have her meet you there and tell your therapist what YOU did...Then, get on your friggin knees in front of them both and admit this failure, take all the blame, and ask her for forgiveness....Don't demand an answer right there from her! Just do it and let her get up, and walk out of the room and complete your session. Then, she'll come back within the next day but do NOT beg, push, force her dude!!! No text, calls, letters, knocking on the door, stalkiing, singing with a f**kin guitar, none of that...just do this....And accept that this next shot, is all you get man.
You got this.
i have told her I won't contact her again .. i asked her to please just meet me at the therapy session on Saturday morning…. what a fool …. but there will be no texts, calls, stalking etc … i gotta sit with this now .. my wrong .. my fault
Exactly friend. Yes, have (allow) her to get in there FIRST and then you come in a little late like 5 mins...not you sitting in there waiting on her. IMPORTANT. The focus will be on you. Get it?....It'll be ok man, just lighten up because you MUST.
NO CONTACT.
I know that'll be tough, but you have to do that part too...
Trust me on this one bruh.....
We cool? Understand?
E-Man.
thanks you so much .. your the only person I have to talk with who understands .. i just hope she will come .. i left it that I won't contact her, and she knows where my therapist is and at what time .. fingers crossed she will come .. i guess if she doesn't want to, I will have to accept that its over.
and yes I understand .. i trust you .. thank you again