I did something disgusting

Okay, so basically, some time back in december, I was anxious about something I had done in the past. I wanted to reassure myself I had done nothing wrong, so I did something pretty disgusting to do it. I don't know why I replicate the act to reassure myself when it just makes me worse. However, now I'm anxious about doing the replicating act. Why can't I just get over it, anxiety makes you do crazy and sometimes even disgusting things. How can I get over this, because I think I can do it easily enough, but I need someone to tell me how.

a thought from the past haunts you - you ruminate over it
it causes anxiety, and you do something to release it
it's not something you want to do, you just feel the 'need' to. so you ruminate over that
which makes you want to 'confess' whatever it was you did wrong, to ease that anxiety

i might be wrong - but it sounds a bit like ocd to me.

it doesn't matter if you done something wrong in your past - it is in the past. there is nothing you can do about it now, as it's done!
you need to just let them thoughts go.
when you think about what you done in the past, just think "it's in the past" and move on.

distract yourself away from those thoughts. don't entertain those thoughts as that is what feeds them.

try and just let them go :)

okami..... You sound a lot like me. I don't know the answer though, I'd like to know as well

I find myself writing notes about certain things and reviewing over & over, but it makes things worse