Fear of devolping schizophrenia
hey everyone im here to share my story cause i feel like i need to be re assured that i dont have it or if i do.
My anxiety all started with when i did marijuana and i had a panic attack and since then i have felt bit out of it. Everything felt like it sped up my heart rate was crazy and was heaps worried i was going to pass out. anyway i moved past that and thought it was me just OD. the following week at school i was told that you can get schizophrenia from having weed just once then it hit me WHAT IF I HAVE IT. then the same feeling came along and i had no idea that it was a panic attack thought i was just losing it. i get home and research about what it couldve been figured out it was a panic attack and was like phew but still schizophrenia worried me and this was like 7 months ago. i researched it saw the symptoms and it didnt match but i still was extremely worried after long study i have learned schizophrenia CAN occur if you where going to get it in life anyway and you have a big family history of it and i dont at all.since this fear i have been worrying about was haunting me for months i have being to a counsler and he helped me alot but now that i have stopped going to him it slowy creeped up on me and then i worried about it and i have had night terrors during this and atm i feel down so tired all the time and not depressed but not happy and i am hearing voices while falling asleep and this morning i heard a voice when i just woke up but i was kinda dreaming i was on a huge boat and it was sinking and someone at the back yelled somthing and then my mum dropped a pan which i think woke me up and i got heaps anxious because of that. i havnt taken any other drugs other from weed and i havnt touched it since that day though i do have a few drinks here and their on special occasions. i also feel detached and its just cloudy i know its depersonaltalion but it just doesnt help with my condition. I used to be so happy and worried about a thing and i just want to go back to that old me so badly... i am 16 years old btw and before having the weed i was already anxious about a few things but no where near as bad thanks guys