Hand me a cigarette please?!

Hi there,
I am a 20-something. Very outgoing, intelligent, and caring....When I am not suffering from boughts of anxiety.

I have had my anxiety more or less under control, since I was "officially" diagnosed 4 years ago. But, I have found more recently, more often than not, it is impairing me from basic functions in work, home, and my relationship life. I have had anxiety most all my life, but as I've gotten older, it's become more and more difficult to handle.

I work right now as a waitress, and part time as a marketing assistant. I am a recent college graduate hoping to become a teacher. My job as a waitress has been pretty difficult for me recently, after a man who raped me when I was a minor showed up to where I work. This was the first time since the event occurred that I saw him (10years ago). I have done a great amount of "healing" on my own over the years with the use of a therapist. However, now every time I need to head into work now, I have these overwhelming stints of anxiety that even lorazepams can't control!

Additionally, I haven't had a long relationship in about 4 years. My most recent one was only about 2 months long. Everything was great, when suddenly he decided to pull a "ghost" and tell me he just "doesn't want to date" anymore. Things were great, and I thought he was someone that really supported me at even my most anxious, so having him as a loss recently has made things, I guess, "extra anxious." My grandfather died just a week before he pulled the "ghost," so imaginably I am taking this a bit harder than most "breakups."
I have felt like I've had such misfortune in finding a partner that maybe it's my anxiety...It's enough for me to handle, let alone other people.

I feel like up until right now, he has such a "calm" for me. Being around him made things really easy for me and I didn't worry so much. I never really let him know this though.

Any and all help/advice is more than welcome.