My first post so can I feel as ill as this because of anxiety???

Hi everybody,
Here is my story....I feel really down right now, Just hope someone can help and maybe agree that it is anxiety????
I am 56, been in good general health all my life but have always been a worrier. I remember many years ago I went through the 'I can't swallow ' thing but got over that OK in time. I am a musician and I do perform even though I have always got quite nervous before a show.
I worked for many years with my father who passed away a few months ago....we were very close and now my Mother relies on me a lot for support.
I have to spend quite a bit of time off and on overseas for my music career and I feel guilty leaving her and my wife in England (my wife is OK about everything) and it was while I was there that I had a panic attack. Previous to that I had some sort of virus which effected my asthma and was on antibiotics which did not seem to help. Was left with a dry cough and feeling of being out of breath.
Anyway while away I had to go to the emergency dept. I could not breathe, came over hot...was sweating shaking...felt like I was dying. They checked me out....heart Ok...lungs clear, but still a bit of a temperature. They said it must be panic and gave me a vallium which I did not take. I did calm down.
After that I kept getting short of breath in the evenings and not feeling good. Was shaking a lot and kept getting hot flushes on and off.
Back here in England I drove to my doctors and had all the same symptoms during the drive....short of breath, panic, numb fingers, hot face. In the surgery he checked me out said my lungs were perfect and said for sure that I had anxiety. He gave me some diazapam to take if I needed it. From that time I have felt so so stressed. Was even stressed about taking the diazapam, but I have taken some and it does take the edge off these feelings. I sleep mostly OK and wake up feeling fine, but after a while those butterfly feelings start in my stomach and I get the symptoms.
The symptoms have changed a bit now....I am not so short of breath and the cough I get with that has about gone, but now I have stomach problems...indigestion acid, also muscle aches and I feel so tired all the time. I get fluttering in my chest as well. Sometimes I still feel short of breath and my face goes red and I feel like I should stretch every muscle in my body...chest as well.
I have gone on long fast walks and that does not tire me or make me feel out of breath so I am sure the doctor is right in saying my lungs are clear. Have been back to him and he still says it is anxiety and he wants me to go to a anxiety help course, but I worry so much that it is more. it seems I have the classic symptoms but I do not know how to get out of it and I feel so ill most of the time lately.
Thanks for listening and any help is appreciated. I will look at some other posts now...thanks again, KevinJ

Hello kevinJ, like you I have all the classic symptoms, I feel sick every minute of every day, I'm back and forth to the doctors but they all try and put me on antidepressants which I will not take, after taking only 2 doses of citalapram I felt like I was dying and so I stopped them straight away. There seems to be no real help anywhere. Please let me know if you find a way of getting rid of it! Don't have much hope left. Hope you feel better very soon. Belle

Hi Belle....wonder what your symptoms are....guess they are like mine????? How long have you been feeling so bad? The diazapam I have works OK but I take very little, not every day and they are only 2mg....just when I feel I can't cope at all and it does work for me to ease some of the symptoms. The doc says he will not give me any more anyway, so not sure what will be on offer from him next time I see him.
Thanks for the reply...just hope that we can both sort this out...it is beginning to rule my life, KEVIN.

My symptoms are hot flushes, racing heart, indigestion acid, uncontrollable shakes, sweaty palms, hot head, muscle tension, dry mouth and nausea and that's just the physical symptoms! It all started about a year ago but is just getting worse. It really does help to talk about it, can get very lonely as I know. Belle

Belle....sounds like many of my symptoms, am so sorry. Everyone tells me to be positive and pull yourself together, we know that's not easy I guess. Hope it works out for you.
forwells.....thanks so much for the reply. You are so right in saying that I must understand what is going on and that it will take work and time to get over this demon.
I have always been a bit of a negative person and always think the worst...I really have to change my outlook somehow. This forum will be a great help to me as well. Just realising that I am not alone in this is a great help already. Will let you know my progress. At the moment I have good times and bad....am hoping for more good soon.
Thanks again....KEVIN