Long Term Klonopin Usage & New Prescription Prozac 10mg
So I've been taking Klonopin for 12 years now. I was just prescribed Fluoxetine HCL 10 MG (Prozac). I haven't started the medication because I've been sick with a horrible flu/cold and from what I've read getting use to this medication can cause some side effects while getting started which I expected since I have an idea of what it's doing to my brain. I told the doctor I was sick of taking Klonopin for so long. I also asked the doctor if there was something that could help me wean off the Klonpopin and I got prescribed the Prozac. I asked her for a baby dose because I was nervous about SSRI's so she gave me 10mg. I also told her that I'm not depressed at all and I just hate feeling slowed down by the medication. I take 0.5mg - 0.75mg of Klonopin every 6-8 hours. I've weened down to a comfortable amount without feeling too high from the Klonopin and using it so I don't feel physical withdrawals. I definitely needed the Klonopin when I started taking it but now I just want this terrible curse to be gone. I'm hoping no matter how long it takes, I'm hoping that maybe an anti-depressant would help re-route my brain to not feel like I have a weight holding me back.
So to re-summarize myself before I go too far into details... I'm trying to re-route my brains serotonin flow and make a new step towards my future to get away from Klonopin after such long usage. My situation may be hard to understand because of the lengthy dosage of Klonopin. My main reason for my post here today is just to get everyone's 2 cents and see if I'm taking the right direction by starting this new medication Prozac soon. I feel from the long term dosage of Klonopin that I've grown above the Klonopin but the withdrawals alone are just too painful so I was seeking a possible aid to redirect my brain to something new to get use to and something to help my serotonin flow.
(SIDE NOTE: Whenever I mention Serotonin I'm hopefully referring to the right thing, Serotonin is the stuff that makes your brain feel happy and feel rewarded and good?)
I've quit before and successfully weaned down and was free for 3 months. That 3 months I seen the beauty in everything. I cried often on how beautiful every little vibration in the world was. I felt everything naturally. My vision was better, I seen the world in full color. I heard every sound around me and it was like I woke up from a terrible dream and was actually able to enjoy life. I relapsed on a back up bottle I had because I was feeling too good and it started causing major anxiety and I had no one to tell me that the war wasn't over when I thought it was. I didn't realize quitting Klonopin like that was gonna take more than 3 months and I should of been ready to relearn to live my reprogrammed mind for years to come. Now I fell back into the pit of Klonopin.
My worries are just feeling maybe too excited like someone drinking an insane amount of energy drink. (Recovering from depression from years ago should I worry about Prozac feeling too strong or possible enhanced memories of the past that caused my depression?) The reason I'm worried about feeling too good and being overwhelmed is because this has probably been the best year of my life and everything is going so well and I'm wanting to do this to get out of the sluggish long term effects of Klonopin and how it's just not working like it use to. Sure it makes me not feel anxious really, but I've been going so many days where the Klonopin has made me only sleep 3 hours then I can't fall back asleep even tho I still feel tired. I also forgot to mention in this post that this was one of my biggest problems is not sleeping fully. I just wanna sleep for more than 6-8 hours for once.
Can anyone give me any good advice about starting this medication and maybe help me feel a bit more confident and tell me if this is the right thing I'm doing? I had a history of depression but these past few years have been strong because I keep myself busy. I have a complex mind where I don't really love the world but I just don't hate it as much as I use to. I also just had a hard time finding good information on anyone with a long term Klonopin dosage and their experience with Prozac. I MISS SLEEPING. Even if this requires getting a beating of effects from getting use to Prozac, It'll be worth it in the long run if it can help me sleep and feel more creative and be happy easier. Just taking Klonopin isn't progressing anywhere. I've tried the increase dose of Klonopin up to even 4mg a day in the past and the high dosage did help me but I was a full walking zombie. I don't really wanna go down that road after such long term usage.
I have so many things to look forward to this upcoming year. I start a 2 year college for computer animation starting next month. I write music on the computer. My creative side has felt slowed down and from what it use to be 5-6 years ago. I have friends that I don't often talk to but are always loving and care for me. My family has my back. The biggest issue I guess to try to summarize this up is I'm so sick of Klonopin, I'm so sick of not sleeping throughout the night, and I'm so looking forward to seeing the world for what it truely is again. I'm hoping this anti-depressant will help me feel happier easier vs doing all these therapeutic mental mind tricks that I've learned to do to keep myself happy and going. Some people can feel naturally happy without much work, sure they get all thee other emotions life comes bundled with but I just wanna feel more. I miss crying, I wanna feel, and I wanna be creative.
I know this is a seriously long post but I felt the details are necessary in getting feedback and kind of an answer that'll help me jump into this new medication with less worry. If you've had a history of taking a Benzo, Can I hear your story? Has anyone successfully taken Prozac not feeling depressed but just to rewire their brain like I'm trying to do? This is a huge step and I just need a hand from some people who has felt even a crumble of pain that I've been through. I'm looking to start taking the Prozac the day after Christmas. I'm not sure how active these forums are but I hope someone can reach out to me. I hope everyone has a wonderful day and remember to smile! <3
