Friends who date anxiety

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08-16-2015, 07:37 PM
bakanishi

Friends who date anxiety

So.....I'm wondering if there's anyone else like me with this problem. I've suffered from anxiety since 5th grade and still suffer from it.

For as long as I can remember(as far back as high school) when ever one of my friends starts dating I feel really uncomfortable and feel this instant sensation of anxiety all over my face and neck. I haven't felt this type of anxiety for a while but one of my friends told me she recently started dating and once she told me i had this instant feeling of pins and needles in my face and neck. When my friends are in a relationship I just can't pull myself to be happy or supportive of them. I was given the news about 3 days ago and I've been under attack from anxiety ever since then. Something about my friends dating makes me super uncomfortable and I don't want to hear or talk about their relationship with them. I tend to distance myself when I'm with my friend and their boyfriend if we happen to be hanging out. So if their together I feel like i should be 10 feet behind them. I just don't want to be apart of it. I don't want them to talk to me about their boyfriend. If they do then I usually become silent, listen for a minute, and then change the subject. I also get anxiety just thinking about what people in relationships do(but that's only if it's one of my friends.) I know being in a relationship and doing that is normal and healthy but it makes me sick in the stomach.

If any of you know or sympathize with this please comment and tell me your thoughts. I don't want to be the only one who feels this way. >n<
08-17-2015, 08:47 AM
gadguy

Quote:

Originally Posted by bakanishi

So.....I'm wondering if there's anyone else like me with this problem. I've suffered from anxiety since 5th grade and still suffer from it.

For as long as I can remember(as far back as high school) when ever one of my friends starts dating I feel really uncomfortable and feel this instant sensation of anxiety all over my face and neck. I haven't felt this type of anxiety for a while but one of my friends told me she recently started dating and once she told me i had this instant feeling of pins and needles in my face and neck. When my friends are in a relationship I just can't pull myself to be happy or supportive of them. I was given the news about 3 days ago and I've been under attack from anxiety ever since then. Something about my friends dating makes me super uncomfortable and I don't want to hear or talk about their relationship with them. I tend to distance myself when I'm with my friend and their boyfriend if we happen to be hanging out. So if their together I feel like i should be 10 feet behind them. I just don't want to be apart of it. I don't want them to talk to me about their boyfriend. If they do then I usually become silent, listen for a minute, and then change the subject. I also get anxiety just thinking about what people in relationships do(but that's only if it's one of my friends.) I know being in a relationship and doing that is normal and healthy but it makes me sick in the stomach.

If any of you know or sympathize with this please comment and tell me your thoughts. I don't want to be the only one who feels this way. >n<

I can sympathize...i was in same boat earlier this year. My best friend married his longtime live in girlfriend. I was afraid it would change our relationship. I think you may be worried more about loosing your friend to the relationship. Real friendships will last through dating, marriages, children and divorces...life is never a constant its always changing.
As far as being sick at thought of relationship, that's your anxiety holding you back, I was held back for years...I'm 50 now and have just started dating for "real" the first time in my life, I had to let go of all the feelings I had about myself, that made me think I was unworthy and undesirable. Its not been easy because I am terribly inexperienced, but every date is a learning experience. Best wishes.
08-17-2015, 03:11 PM
bakanishi

Thank you for your comment. The thing that doesn't make sense to me is why am I after 4 days now still feeling anxious? It's just the thought of them being romantic and such that makes me feel sick to my stomach. I don't like the thought of it. I mean I can see my friend in my imagination doing these things and I'm ill from it. I've been this way with all my friends but this never happens when it's family.
08-18-2015, 12:20 PM
gadguy

Quote:

Originally Posted by bakanishi

Thank you for your comment. The thing that doesn't make sense to me is why am I after 4 days now still feeling anxious? It's just the thought of them being romantic and such that makes me feel sick to my stomach. I don't like the thought of it. I mean I can see my friend in my imagination doing these things and I'm ill from it. I've been this way with all my friends but this never happens when it's family.

In many ways our friends are closer to us than our families...they are our contemporaries....just try not think about what they may or may not be doing...also whatever they doing is natural, I don't like to guess but could it be you are having some issues dealing with the thought of being intimate with someone and this aggravated by the thought of your friend being intimate with some.one..just a thought but what do i know?