I literally can't take it anymore, Cheating OCD?
Hello, first my name is Jake, I am 19 years old and have been dating the love of my life for almost 3 years. At the age of 9 I had Scarlet's fever which later caused me to have OCD that was diagnosed by a psychologist at age 9. Over the course of my life I've had many bouts with anxiety including religious anxiety, ROCD, Health anxiety, and most recently cheating OCD. Before I met my girlfriend I had been cheated on and after that relationship spent the next 9 months trying to talk to as many girls as I could and during this time played a game online where you could talk inappropriately to other users but it wasn't the main focus of the game and infact against their rules. By the time I started dating my girlfriend I rarely played this game and instead only played it whenever my cousin was over who played it with me, I quit the relationship about 2 weeks into our relationship because I lost interest in the game but during those two weeks to my memory did nothing inappropriate. Lately my OCD has been focused on what if I cheated on my girlfriend with those old girls I used to talk too or what if I did those things on that game while dating my girlfriend and just don't remember that well. I've broken down and cried almost everyday for the past 2 weeks and I literally can't take it anymore. The only thing keeping me reassured is my girlfriend who said I wasn't really into it that much when she met me and confirmed I only played it when my cousin was over and also why would it come up randomly out of the blue after almost 3 years to bug me? Wouldn't I have felt guilty about this our whole relationship? I can't shake this and I really need help. Can anyone please tell me if this sounds like OCD and anxiety and what should I do? Thank you.
