OCD destroying my life, worries of assault and false memories

Hello!
I'm a little at loss for what I should do...
I'm 16, and have been suffering from OCD for a few years now. Most of my OCD worries are about being a pedophile. I'm really worried, because, upon my first time getting drunk, at a house party, I'm worried I could've molested the younger sister of the guy who was hosting. My friend says she watched me the entire time, and that there's no possibility. Also, I'm worried, because at another party, (wasn't drinking! learned my lesson!), there was a younger brother in the house, and I'm worried I could've assaulted him :c :c :c all the memories feel so vivid!! Can false memories go so far to even have scent attached to them???!! I've always had an incredibly vivid imagination.

Please help. This is killing me inside. What should I do??

Hello and welcome to the forum :)
Oh you poor thing,What your going through is a mix of anxiety and what we call pure O or intrusive thoughts,they are a pain in the backside and I fully understand how scared you are as I get them and you will find so many people get them and in fact everyone gets some kind of intrusive thoughts but because we have anxiety we think about them over and over and then we question them,things like
Why am I thinking about that ?
Does that mean I want to do it ?
Am I going to do it?
Am I losing my mind or going mad?
Why can't I stop them?
I must be a bad person to think this?
And the answer to all this is NO
Your normal,
Are you on anything to
Cope or do you go to therapy ?
Emma :)

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Originally Posted by Ringoboo

Hello! I'm a little at loss for what I should do... I'm 16, and have been suffering from OCD for a few years now. Most of my OCD worries are about being a pedophile. I'm really worried, because, upon my first time getting drunk, at a house party, I'm worried I could've molested the younger sister of the guy who was hosting. My friend says she watched me the entire time, and that there's no possibility. Also, I'm worried, because at another party, (wasn't drinking! learned my lesson!), there was a younger brother in the house, and I'm worried I could've assaulted him :c :c :c all the memories feel so vivid!! Can false memories go so far to even have scent attached to them???!! I've always had an incredibly vivid imagination. Please help. This is killing me inside. What should I do??

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Do you have those thoughts about kids during the day ever when you are alone or is it only when you are over a friends house with younger kids?

If you believe that you may be attracted to kids or have the desire to do things that you shouldn't, you should definitely speak to a professional.

On the other hand, anxiety disorders and OCD go hand in hand

Intrusive thoughts that scare the hell out of you are completely normal when your mind is under too much stress

You can read through the threads here about it where there are many irrational thoughts having to do with some of the darkest things

If that is the case, no worries. Just a normal piece of the puzzle and you need to learn to not react to those type thoughts and they will disappear

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Ringoboo

Hello!
I'm a little at loss for what I should do...
I'm 16, and have been suffering from OCD for a few years now. Most of my OCD worries are about being a pedophile. I'm really worried, because, upon my first time getting drunk, at a house party, I'm worried I could've molested the younger sister of the guy who was hosting. My friend says she watched me the entire time, and that there's no possibility. Also, I'm worried, because at another party, (wasn't drinking! learned my lesson!), there was a younger brother in the house, and I'm worried I could've assaulted him :c :c :c all the memories feel so vivid!! Can false memories go so far to even have scent attached to them???!! I've always had an incredibly vivid imagination.

Please help. This is killing me inside. What should I do??

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You would be surprised at how many times people suffering with severe forms of OCD present with very similar stories to those you describe.

The fear of having committed terrible things (pedophilia is high on the list).

The only way I can describe it in short, is that the vivid images attached to the thoughts are no different to someone playing out a "death from serious illness" in their mind.

Someone who is afraid of dying of cancer, will often have thoughts of what the illness will do to their body, what and who it will affect in their lives. In the same way we can remember vivid dreams.

So if someone thinks assaults on children as being a hurendous act, (most people) it makes some sense that just 1 intrusive thought of doing so would set off a fear that the thought somehow has validity. And so the cycle begins and worsens.

And yes your brain is that powerful that your vivid thoughts can certainly produce phantom smells, sounds and images.

As is recommended in the above posts definitely go see your doctor to get referred for help with managing your condition.