Having a horrible day...just wish I could run away from it all.

Well, it's another roller coaster kind of day. I had a pretty good day yesterday (although the heart flutters were still present with full force). I went to bed fairly early last night, for me anyway. I got up around 10 am this morning and felt like trash. I am so tired...I just want to go back to bed. My stomach is killing me, I have no appetite, I am irritable, and the heart flutters/ jumps/ thumps are still rearing their ugly head. I am trying to push it all back for the sake of my husband and 4 beautiful children, but it is hard and it is making me more miserable.
I can honestly say that if it wasn't for these heart flutters I wouldn't feel so bad, but they are really making life hard right now. They are constant and never ending. I have endless thumps in my chest and it is draining the life out of me.
I have prayed, cut down on caffeine and chocolate, taken magnesium, drank chamomile tea, and even tried to do a little exercise (I am scared to death to exercise because of my heart), but nothing works.
I am TRYING to make an appointment with a cardiologist, but I have to go through my PCM first (military doctors..yay!). I am WAITING on them to call me back after my ER visit on Thursday. This is like a horrible nightmare...I want to be a good momma for my children, but this is making it hard. My 14 year old daughter has had to step up and be more of a mother than me and that hurts...really bad.
Any advice would be so much appreciated. I have read a lot of the comments from my other posts and they have helped (temporarily) and them I am right back in a slump again.
I feel like I could have a heart attack at any moment or maybe my heart will just stop. This is no way to live.