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View Full Version : Hi, I'm new



lanthanein
03-06-2012, 10:08 AM
I have an unspecified (ie none of my doctors have yet specified to me) anxiety disorder. I've had anxiety issues my whole life and I remember having panic attacks as far back as 16+ years ago.

However, I had never formally sought any treatment until recently, possibly because I was doing well for many years. I had occasional bouts of more severe symptoms. I would isolate myself and neglect everyday responsibilities. My only acute symptoms tended to be caused by what I suspect is a phobia of... a certain common household pest. I'd just type it, but I have trouble with the name.

In Jan 2011 I began experiencing the worst symptoms of my life (I think). I'm not sure it was triggered by anything in particular, though I had been under stress. For example: I'd been working overtime for more than 2 months straight, I made a decision to "disown" my abusive father following 2010's traditional holiday fight, and I went to the emergency room with anaphylaxis.

It's been a very difficult, surreal, and unpleasant year. And frustrating. As I mentioned, my father was abusive. When I was living with my parents and not yet an adult, it was a lot worse of a time. (In retrospect, I've realized I have trouble remembering a lot of my life in middle and high school.) It follows that I should be doing better now than I was then. But, here I am, over a decade later, almost entirely unable to function.

I started CBT (Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy), but stopped due to transportation difficulties. I'm on Venlafaxine (Effexor), Busipirone, Lorazepam (Ativan), and Zolpidem (Ambien) for my symptoms. The medicines are most certainly helping. I am hugely better than before I began taking them, but it would be an overstatement to say I am successfully managing my anxiety. I still have thought loops, I get so tense I end up sore, and I spend a good chunk of each day in a depersonalized/derealized state. But I haven't had a panic attack in several months, which is really nice.

Oh yeah. I'm 29 and female. I have 2 dogs and a cat. Love animals. Also, I really miss coffee.

alankay
03-06-2012, 02:53 PM
I'm glad you've some gotten treatment. It will take time and you may have some setbacks as well all mostly do. Keep working with the docs and therapist. Alankay