How to deal with family

[indiana]

How do you deal with your family when you have anxiety? They cannot understand and I do not blame them but apart from having to deal with the daily troubles I feel guilty that my husband has to live with somebody
who is pessimistic, angry all the time, depressed etc. (always something wrong).This adds to all my symptoms and drives me crazy. Sometimes I think he would be better off without me and could get on with his life because it is not only me but
also he dragging down. Does anybody have some advice ofwhat to do. Thanks
Indiana

[alankay]

Indy, where are with with any treatment(s)? Any meds or counseling, etc?

[jessed03]

I won't say 'overcome' as it perhaps isn't the right word, but in the space of 6 months, people can have anxiety well and truly under control. With a course of meds (if necassary) and some form of therapy, or councilling, people can resume a lot of their normal life in a suprisingly short space of time. Even though it never feels like it, always keep that in mind when you have thoughts of letting everything go.

Family reactions to illness are always different. It's unfortunate that yours aren't the most understanding. It all depends on the experiences somebody has had throughout their lives. If people have had it, or been around it, they are obviously more likely to understand, whereas if they've had no contact with it, it may be confusing to them to see somebody ill, with no physical signs of ailment.

The only things that helped for me, were education, honesty and space. Ensuring those around me knew what I was dealing with, and where my reactions came from, I feel, at least made some small change in allowing them to understand. If your husband is willing, perhaps he could read a book on the subject. There are some online, for very cheap, that sum anxiety up in a ways thats easy to understand and follow. Perhaps he could come to a concelling session with you, to hear you express your issues out loud? If people around you are unsupportive, and stress you further, it could be wise to limit your contact with them, if possible. When recovering from a breakdown, a lot of my friendships and relationships were lessened. We still kept in contact, but I needed the energy to get better, and not to stress out further, so I kept contact to a minimum, and usually short phone calls or over email. That's not always possible in a marriage, but you can learn to give each other a little more space and discretion on those bad days.

You can console yourself, and others, with the fact that when you get better, you will play more of an active role. You need to be allowed to be unwell for a while though, it's the only way you'll really heal. The stress of pretending just makes matter worse, as you know. It's important to have supportive people in your life, if you can't get that at home, there are many support groups where normal people with depression, or anxiety go to just have a meal, or a drink, and chat, or there are forums, and online support groups, there are also group therapy sessions, and individual therapy sessions. It's important to get the emotions out there. Your concern for your family is a very normal feeling with regards to any health issue and their relationships.