Hello all

[peachcake]

Good evening everyone,

Ive suffered with Emetophobia (fear of vomit) for 42 years since I was 8 years old. This condition unbeknown to me until around 5 years ago, was the root cause of the depression and anxiety also felt.
I have been taking Venlifaxine 225-300ml for over 4 years and have had all available therapies including the much feared exposure, albeit very badly handled by the NHS therapist.

My reason for joining at this time is because my husband is going away to work on his parents villa in Spain next week and despite me, crying, shouting and even having a panic attack (the second of only 2, the first being when my daughter told me she was emigrating), he just will not hear of not going (and not making me suffer anyway) so I need to have somewhere to go to speak to people who will not judge me if I need support when he is away.
Im not entirely sure what exactly Im scared of, my son aged 16 will be here with me and is good company so I wont be on my own and I have a good family nearby, I think maybe its the thought of the horrible feeling of being upset and sad. We've not spent more than one night apart in 20 years, it might also be the feeling of rejection because he wants to go away even though he knows how upset Iam about it, and given our very rocky relationship and his couple of affairs Im probably insecure on top of all my other afflictions!
Anyway, I am an 'expert' on Emetaphobia, anxiety and depression so I hope I can be some help to others on here

So thats me Peachcake

[alankay]

Peach, I think you are having some anticipatory anxiety about this change. It happens to us anxious folks and you found a good spot for support. Alankay.

[peachcake]

Thank you, you'll no doubt hear from me at some ridiculous hour during the week begining 14th :)

[alankay]

Peach, it might not be as bad as you fear. How long will he be gone? It might go by pretty quickly. Anticipatory Anxiety often is worse than the actual anxiety from the dreaded event/situation. Alankay.

[*pixiedust*]

What alankay says is very true, anticipatory anxiety is very very strong and horrible to deal with. You need to think posotively, dont sit and worry adding thoughts like "I wont cope""I will be a wreck", they wont help. Change it to, "I know I am worried about my husband going away but I get time to pamper myself and spend time with my son and go visit family and I love doing that". Did you know that the chinese symbol for crisis is actually the same as the one for oppurtunity? You could go shopping, go to a spa, go to the cinema and watch a chick flick, go bowling, go for a day out with your son, visit ur family, go for a family meal, go swimming, go to a theme park, visit some friends, meet friends for luch, go to a museum or an art gallery? Or, if you dont like going out, u can watch all the chick flicks u like! All the food you like, u choose the meals! Paint ur nails, if I got time on my own, I would definately run myself a nice hot bath and sit in it for hours! lol. The world is ur oyster and u can fill it with lots of nice things, really treat urself, buy urself some flowers and a choccie bar or a new pair of shoes :-) Turn this into a good thing of how much time u get to spend on you. Congratulate urself along the way, remind urself how proud you are of yourself and how proud ur family are of you for doing okay with this, and think how proud ur husband will be when he gets back. You will be absolutely fine, and u have us to talk to :-)


You mentioned having a therapist, and unfortunately mentioned that you didnt feel it went well. Did you ask to see another therapist? Do you have general anxiety? I'm just wondering, if u get anxious a lot, do you think some talking therapy would help? Although, obviously you can come on here as much as you like and talk it out :-)