Fear of people not picking up phonecalls, returning calls, returning texts etc

[Anselm]

A wee quick question for you. Anybody who can identify would be greatly appreciated.

If I call someone and they don't pick up, if I leave a message and they don't return the call, if I send an e-mail and its not returned etc etc... I spend the rest of the day worrying that I've done something really bad to them. That I've upset them some way. That they hate me etc etc.

Usually the next time I see them all is well: ' Sorry I didn't get back in touch with you but I was really busy etc etc.'

So I've spent all that time worrying and having sleepless nights over nothing. Does anyone else have this problem? How do you cope with it?

[ksmow]

How would you feel if nobody responded to this thread?

[ksmow]

After taking a few minutes to think of this, it sounds like you're a chronic people pleaser and when you don't get responded to right away it feels as if you're being rejected as a human. Does this sound right?

[IndependentJenn]

I agree with ksmow...the thing is, I understand, its hard. Something happen to you as a child where you were abandoned? Kinda sounds like that too? I know thats my case, its almost like a self-esteem thing. You take it personal and think you did something wrong. You know that this is a irrational thought though right? As long as you can look at it that was it may help with your anxiety over it. If you wanna talk anymore, hit me up :)

[Anselm]

Ksmow. Your initial response was very funny, really. I'm not that bad. If I have slept well, eaten well, it doesn't bother me one jot and I agree with Independent Jenn, such thoughts are irrational. If I have not slept well, have had an unhealthy diet, then I worry too much. Funny thing is I work in an industry where, when I have been in their position, I have been too busy to reply, return a phonecall or have been curt on the phone. I think I wrote the initial response at a low point. The logic is if someone doesn't return a phonecall or e-mail back its because they are busy. But, and I am sure I am not alone, if you are at a low point, you assume the worst. I'm not on an anxiety forum by accident.

[Darknite]

I agree with Jan I used to worrie bout that phone email etc as well distract ya mind off that it will make ya anxiety worse by dwelling on it