advice please

[Chiliphil1]

Hello,

I'm sure some of you have read my previous posts, and am somewhat familiar with what my issues are, quick recap, I am having anxiety, sometimes high anxiety, and do have panic attacks. My main issue is coming from my job, at least I believe that's what started it.
Recently I have gotten sick, I have not been to a doctor for it, but I believe it's either bronchitis, or a cold, which I am not sure. My point to all this is that the issues going on are causing me to worry, I sometimes feel like I cannot get enough air ( I can, my mind just feels like it) and of course I start to worry about it, and BAM panic attack. The first panic attack over this was 3 nights ago, and I took an Ativan to help, and was fine, but noticed some elevated anxiety the next day.
The next night, same thing as soon as I lie on my back I feel like I can't get enough air, and go into panic attack mode, I took a Xanax that night and again, I went right to sleep, the next day was pretty good, and anxiety was at a normal level, but still there. Last night I did it again, but I did not take anything for it, instead talked myself though the anxiety until I fell asleep.
Today I have had 2 episodes of the anxiety attacks, although these are a bit different than what I am used to, normally I will get a sudden urge to run and hide that passes pretty quickly, but the ones I have had today, and the last 3 nights these are long, they come on slowly, and then build, they never seem to get to the peak where I feel like I am going to black out, but just seem to go on and on for at least 20 minutes.
My question in all this is that I have resisted a benzo since last night, although I have been tempted. I am on here to ask if it would be a bad idea to take one, I have been using them for about 6 months on and off. I only take them when I need them, and have no regularity to them, simply if I need them, I take them, and if I don't I don't. I have been periods where I would take maybe 5 in a weeks time, and when the anxiety stopped, I quit with the pills and was fine, and then have gone a month or more with none, it just depends on what my anxiety is doing, and right now it is a bit rough due to being sick, and worrying about it. I am just really worried about getting addicted or dependant. I absolutely want to beat anxiety, and I know meds are not the way to beat it, simply an aid on the journey, I just don't want to get myself in trouble with the Benzo's.
I am really trying to breath through it all, and do progressive relaxation, but that is extremely hard to do when you feel like you are having 20 minute long panic attacks! I am really not wanting to take a benzo, but I know it would take the worry away, however I want to beat it on my own. I am just asking if it would be ok to do so if it gets that bad, I am worried because I have taken 2 pills in the last 3 days, and normally I do not take them that often, although I did take them for about 4 consecutive days about 5 months ago, there was even a day when I took 2 when I was starting Zoloft which I am now off of.
I am asking because I appreciate and trust what it said on this forum because you guys have been here. My wife is telling me I worry too much and the fact that I am nervous about taking the pills shows it, I am too nervous to even take something to help with being nervous! anyway she said to me, you keep worrying like this and it is going to kill you, and wouldn't you know, that made me worry!
Anyhoo any feedback would be appreciated, and I am going to try to do this without a Benzo so that I can strenghten myself enough to beat this junk!

[alankay]

Chili, anxiety never killed anyone but it sure is awful, scary and uncomfortable as hell(mine was freaking naaasty). I commend you on your desire to get by w/o meds. Why did you stop the zoloft?? The whole idea behind the zoloft is to lower your anxiety so you would not need or need a benzo much less. SSRI's often stop panic attacks or shorten them and reduce frequency and duration of them. Rethink that.
Anyway, you can take the benzos as needed(I do). That what's good about them. They work fast unlike SSRI's. But SSRI's are not habit forming. The idea is to use only enough only when you really need it. Trouble can be they work so well some folks think that's the answer and don't learn about anxiety, how to calm oneself, follow up with the therapists/docs, look at their life stressors, etc, and do all the other things needed to treat anxiety. Most people listen to the docs/therapists and limit the benzo use and it's OK especially in the early stages of treatment when folks can still be very anxious. Take the minimum you need to get relief when it's bad.
Breathing complaints are common. Notice when you take the xanax you don't have the problem and xanax doesn't do anything for the lung, just your anxiety so don't worry about your lungs/breathing. Just consider that another symptom of your anxiety. We all have slight different exact symptoms but the same cause-anxiety. Thing is, what's causing the anxiety. What's stressing/troubling/worrying you? Perhaps write down on a sheet of paper all the thing right now in you life that trouble/worry/bother you. Step back and look at things and try to figure if there's something, perhaps just below the surface, that is really troubling you. Just a thought. PM me any time. Alankay

[Chiliphil1]

Chili, anxiety never killed anyone but it sure is awful, scary and uncomfortable as hell(mine was freaking naaasty). I commend you on your desire to get by w/o meds. Why did you stop the zoloft?? The whole idea behind the zoloft is to lower your anxiety so you would not need or need a benzo much less. SSRI's often stop panic attacks or shorten them and reduce frequency and duration of them. Rethink that.
Anyway, you can take the benzos as needed(I do). That what's good about them. They work fast unlike SSRI's. But SSRI's are not habit forming. The idea is to use only enough only when you really need it. Trouble can be they work so well some folks think that's the answer and don't learn about anxiety, how to calm oneself, follow up with the therapists/docs, look at their life stressors, etc, and do all the other things needed to treat anxiety. Most people listen to the docs/therapists and limit the benzo use and it's OK especially in the early stages of treatment when folks can still be very anxious. Take the minimum you need to get relief when it's bad.
Breathing complaints are common. Notice when you take the xanax you don't have the problem and xanax doesn't do anything for the lung, just your anxiety so don't worry about your lungs/breathing. Just consider that another symptom of your anxiety. We all have slight different exact symptoms but the same cause-anxiety. Thing is, what's causing the anxiety. What's stressing/troubling/worrying you? Perhaps write down on a sheet of paper all the thing right now in you life that trouble/worry/bother you. Step back and look at things and try to figure if there's something, perhaps just below the surface, that is really troubling you. Just a thought. PM me any time. Alankay

thank you again sir, you always provide me excellent answers. I stopped zoloft due to extreme tiredness when I was on it, also the doctor who gave it to me did not seem to have a through understanding of it. I had bad anxiety and palpitations after starting it, I realize now that it is normal for that to happen, but the doctor was saying " that's not good, you need to stop taking it immediately" but I looked it up for myself and found that it was normal for that to happen, so I kept taking it, those side effects went away, but once they did the only thing I wanted to do was sleep, I was so tired I could barely function, so I waned myself off. As mentioned in my post, I am looking at alternative ways to overcome this, I am not interested in taking meds and " hiding " from it, i realize that sometimes meds are neccesary, and that some people need them, I may in fact be one of them, I guess I will find out once I get back to a doctor which will be soon ( I just got insurance ) but I really want to do it without them, I just know that Benzos have a bad rap, and having an anxious mind, I tend to worry about the bad things happening, such as addiction, etc... and you are right, once I took the pills my breathing was fine, as it is when I am not thinking about it, just something about lying down makes it worse. thanks again for the reply.

[alankay]

Yep. SSRI's can cause temp increase in anxiety and often they start folks at half dose for a week or two before moving to the normal dose to help avoid that.
Well a therapist is who you should be working with if meds are not at all desired. They don't prescribe(I'm sure you know that) but can help w/o meds via CBT, psychotherapy, etc, etc. Alankay

[alankay]

Chili, judicious use of the benzo is fine. But at the same time have you asked about another SSRI like Celexa or fluoxetine? Start at a very low dose for 2 weeks then raise it slowly. I like fluoxetine. Ask the doc about the 10mg tab. Take 5mg a day(1/2 tab), see how you feel, for 2 weeks. If doing OK go to 10mgs a day for 2 weeks, see how you feel, go to 15mg(1-1/2 tab) for 2 weeks if doing OK go to 20mg and hold there for a month(or longer) and reevaluate your status/progress with your doc. Same for celexa(citalopram), same dosing regime/ suggestion. Goal will be to make you feel less anxious and thereby decreasing benzo use. The less you use the benzo the less any real tolerance to them will develop. Don't worry about he SSRI's, They are cousins of common antihistamines. Look it up. Non addicting, etc. Helped me allot and I started them slowly as my pdoc recommended. PM my any time. Alankay.