first therapy/counseling session today and book rec

[homebird]

I have my first therapy/counseling session today. I'm a bit nervous. I'm not sure what to expect or what emotions/feelings will be dredged up by talking about my panic attacks.

Also, I want to thank the people who recommended the book "Hope and Help for your Nerves" by Claire Weekes. I bought it last week and oh man, amazing. I'm only a few chapters in, but I feel like this book describes exactly how I'm feeling, and the advice is really practical. I'm sure it'll take awhile to get a handle on some of the concepts she's talking about acceptance, facing, floating, etc) but I imagine in the long run it will be good.

I went through and highlighted things because my husband's going to read the book after me. He thinks it will help him understand how I feel and how he can encourage/help me through this time.

[jessed03]

Claire Weeks is amazing right? It does take a while to understand. Even years down the line I still have those epiphany moments, ya know the ones where you just 'get it'. You can see you've been doing something slightly (I don't wanna say wrong) but unhelpfully. For instance theres still negative self talk in one aspect of your life, maybe career, or you still retain muscle stress when doing something like queing in a busy store. I think it's such a nice book, just to hear somebody else say it, and understand it. It makes a person feel they aren't in the fight alone. It's really great your husband is taking such an active interest. I can imagine anxiety being such a hard concept for people to grasp, as theres no real reason for it a lot of the time (in their eyes anyway) and so they dismiss it as somebody being silly, when, in reality, it can be far more crippling than a lot of physical illnesses!

How did your therapy session go anyway? Was it CBT? They do feel weird at first! A nice therapist gives you confidence though.

[homebird]

The therapy session went well. It was a little weird at first. I think the first one was sort of a "get to know you and your issues" type of thing (lol). I talked a lot about myself, and she asked a lot of questions to get to know the type of person/personality I have.

We established that I have a very poor self image, and I do a lot of negative self-talk. It's funny because I didn't realize I was doing that, but when she pointed out that my view of myself and my life doesn't really match what is actually happening, I was like "Oh yeah. You're right!" I had no idea I was such a negative person. I mean, I always knew I was an anxious/stressed person, but I think if I can learn to turn my thoughts around and be more positive that may help a lot of my anxiety.

Anyway, I know this is just the tip of the giant freaking iceburg, but I really hope it helps. I think this in combination with my meds is going to help me deal with this better in the future.

[alankay]

Homebird, that first step is always hardest and I hope you keep going! It will help.