Here to meet others with anxiety and panic, I feel so alone

[beckyj6]

Hi, my name is Rebecca and I am hoping to meet others who suffer from anxiety and panic disorder. I started having panic attacks 3 years ago this month. They started after I was involved in a car accident. The accident itself was really not that bad, no injury's, but it must have triggered something.

I panic about my health. All of my panic attacks center around dying. For some reason, every time I have an ache or pain, I automatically think worst case scenario. If I get a chest pain, I freak out that I am having a heart attack, if I get a pain in my arm or leg, I think it's a blood clot, when I get a headache, it's a brain aneurysm, if I get a pain in my side, I think it's something wrong with my appendix or kidney or something, if my left shoulder or arm hurts, it's a heart attack.... You get the point. I do have a strong family history of heart attacks, blood clots, and stroke, my mother had a blood clot in her arm when she was only 33, and it broke away causing a stroke. I think about it all the time and worry that it will happen to me.

I have been to the dr about this and they wanted to put me on meds, but I get panic attacks about taking medication too. I freak out that I am going to have a bad side affect from it and die. So I haven't tried taking anything, but I think I am ready to. I can't live like this anymore, it is taking over my life and affecting the way I live. I have made a dr appt for a week from Monday to talk more about trying medication.

The last week has been really bad, I have felt so stressed and tense, which only makes the panic worse, because I worry about how psychically stressed my body feels, and how that is affecting my heart. All day yesterday I just couldn't relax, my body was so tense and I had a really hard time getting to sleep, I spent the first half of the night waking up every time I would fall asleep because I just couldn't relax, when I finally did fall asleep I slept until 1pm in the afternoon, which is just not normal at all for me. I am thinking this is starting to make me depressed.

Thanks for taking the time to listen, I hope to meet others who are going through the same thing as I am.

[cashbread]

hi becky i think you are right to go to a doctor and start living a normal life again you will get some meds and you will open like a rose in spring time
why should you live in fear all the time ?
be strong and happy

[Miranda-e]

Hi Becky

I'm new here too, just joined today in fact. I really wanted to reply to your post because I do understand how you feel, at least in part. I also have anxiety about being unwell, and I most definitely make things worse by worrying about it, which in turn just heightens the anxiety. It's a viscious circle.

I think you're right to go back and see your doctor, because even if you decide not to take the offered medication your doctor might be able to refer you on to someone else who may be able to help you. Maybe a therapist? Have you ever tried any other kinds of therapies to help treat your anxieties?

If you ever need anyone to talk to, about anything, please feel free to message me.

E x

[Camry2004]

Hi Rebecca,

I can related 100% this anxiety thing is new to me infact im 15 months into this. It all started from me getting dizzy one day off tylenol pm's and went to the ER. all tho nothing was physically wrong it triggered something and now i get anxiety attacks as well as became a hypochondriac. i got the same way about meds and side effects etc so i can relate to your story. i tried therapy a few times but couldnt stick to it cause of my hectic work schedule but now the anxiety is back in full force and i just called my therapist again. each day i center situations around dying a headache is a tumor, numbness is a stroke etc and i go to the dr at least once a month. i really dont have anyone to talk to so thats why i chose to come to forums to see if people can relate to my story and to get some tips and or advice becuase if u have not gone thru what im experiencing then u cant relate.

[loveandfireworks]

Hi Rebecca,

Your post sounds exactly like how I feel. Most of my anxiety stems from my worries about my health as well. I actually think the exact same things as you whenever I have the slightest ache or pain or general weird feeling like lightheadedness. I have had every test imaginable done, with all the results normal. I do not like to take medication either, partially because I am afraid of having side effects and also because I have a fear of swallowing large pills (I worry they will get stuck in my throat).

Just like you and Camry I do not know where to turn since none of my friends or my family really understand what I am going through....most of them just expect me to get over it. I am seeing a counselor who is developing a treatment plan for me to try and understand my anxiety triggers/likeliness of the feared outcome actually occurring and strategies that I can use to overcome the anxiety. If I find something that really helps me with health anxiety, I will be sure to share it with you guys and I hope you will all share any strategies that help you as well!

[Schatmeisje]

Hi All, I am exactly the same, apart from the fact that my anxiety and panic attacks got worse to the point of involving agoraphobia. The only way i was able to stop the health anxiety and doctors and hospital visits was to ban myself from google, so i couldnt look up and symptoms, and also seeing my psychologist, who gave me the best advice ever. What I started doing was accepting the feeleings, I can now get numb down my whole left side and it doesnt even panic me anymore, i can just ignore it. basically i just say to myself that it is the anxiety, that i know this because have been told hundreds of times and had all the correct tests, and that it will be gone by tomorrow, and it always is gone and it always passes.
The only thing that makes me nervous now is being dizzy, i still cant handle that one as it still makes me feel out of control.
I also tried mindfulness training which was really great and not what i was expecting at all, and i made so much progress with everything while i was having it once a week that a panic attack would not even worry me in the slightest , but i had to stop due to finance reasons.
I am still a big work in progress, and it has been a very rough 18 months, but i can now go out again, not to all places, but some ! and i have never had any medications (only because i am terrified of them LOL)
Its great being here to have others to talk to who are the same and who understand, i personally think it is impossible for someone to understand unless they have been through it.
If anyone wants to chat or talk, im here x

[Thrifty917]

Becky your post honestly made me cry because its exactly what I am going through too. I don't have any advice for you, but you are not alone!

[carebear:)]

i feel exactly the same have health anxiety constantly all day everyday it's exhausting! have major anxiety issues and social phobia and panik attacks hate being on my own but when im with other people other than my husband i get so anxious it's just not worth it so feel very alone right now don't have any real friends as i guess they don't really want to know me or try to understand what i go threw everyday living with high anxiety i have low iron at the moment and as it causes high heart rate i'm constantly a wreak thinking im going to die from it getting to low or have a heart attack or something. Also hate that from anxiety i have aching muscles and tummy problems and over breathe and cry all the time all leading to more anxiety vicious circle grrr! you are not alone if you want to chat im here just message me x

[loveandfireworks]

Like Schatmeisje said, it's hard for people to understand unless they have been through it. That's what we are all here for.....to help each other the best we can. I spent a lot of time on the forum the other day and read somewhere that people had a lot of luck with Claire Weekes' books....the reviews on
Amazon also sound like she talks about health anxiety so I am going to the bookstore tomorrow to try to find a couple of them and give them a try....I'll let you guys know what I think.

My anxiety also makes me begin to cry too carebear, since I am so frustrated for feeling the anxiety and hate feeling the anxiety over every little thing and also worry that I am too much to handle (I turn to my boyfriend usually when I am having a panic attack and I am afraid that he is going to get sick of me having attacks; I have lost so many other people due to my anxiety and how they dont understand and dont want to deal with me and I don't want to lose him too), which like you also said just leads to more of the vicious anxiety cycle.

[alankay]

Rebecca, I had the same feeling/fear of having a health issue. Bottom line is..............it's anxiety. All of it. I take it you have been checked out by your dr. If so you should examine what is going on in your life to rule out a environmental or stress/conflict cause(work/family/relationships/past trauma if any, etc). Talking to someone is the best first step.
If you can find no reason for you to be so anxious I'd talk to my dr. about a SHORT trail of a benzo. JUST enough to see if it relieves your anxiety. If so at least you know it's is anxiety and then to which to an ssri or buspar for a longer course. Again use the benzodiazepine just to help determine if it's allllllllll just anxiety. If so switch to say zoloft and come off the benzo. Don't be afraid of the meds. Rebecca you are suffering and need some relief. You need to know there is relief and help. Talking to a counselor, sympathetic friend, clergy would help. Also working with you dr. with meds is important.
I've had anxiety since I was 18(now am 48) and sure wished these forums were around when I first had issues. Anyway see your dr., you know in the past when my anxiety was not in very good control and I didn't understand it I thought I had bone cancer, heart issues, oral cancer, skin cancer. I laugh at that now. Every little thing that goes on in you body is exaggerated by anxiety and that's likely what's happening to you. In a nutshell talk to someone if you can like a counselor then see you dr. If they agree to a very short trial of say klonopin, diazepam or tranxene and IF you feel "so much better". Bingo. Allllllll anxiety and these days a course of say 6 months on an ssri like zoloft I bet would be helpful and what I wish I had back when I first started suffering with anxiety. It's alll high adrenaline and anxiety(worry/high distress) and there's help. Don't suffer, see you dr. Message me any time.