iv hit an all time low and feel so helpless...can anyone help?

[worrier123]

guys i really dont no what to do, i feel the lowest i have ever felt! my anxiety and panic have hit me the hardest ever the last couple of weeks but mainly yesturday and partly today, i normally feel my worst on a hangover but today i woke up all panicy and felt like there was no way out, half the time i dont no why im anxious or panicy i just know that when it happens its the most terrafying feeling ever and never want to feel it again. I had mini panic attacks all day y´day and called the NHS helpline cos i genuinelly thought that my body was just going to give in, they asked me have i harmed myself or others or thoughts of such and of course i said no but then after the call i thought what if it gets so bad that i end up doing something stupid in the heat of a panic attack, what if this is now my life and i just have to put up with it. its made me loose my appetite to the point where i eat nothing all day and force myself to eat the one or two crisps, im constantly feeling sick and stomach is in knots, im shakey all the time and always cold, when the panic fear washes over me my legs and arms suddenly get very hot and feel not right which then sets of other panic symptoms. iv been having reiki sessions which is all about chanelling positive energy and healing and i thought it was helping but today i just broke down, im on meds but only been 2weeks and its only a low dose, iv applied for CBT sessions and i have my assesment next week with a councelor, i read self help books, im on here all the time and googling things constantly trying to reasure myself that what im feeling is normal but its as if something in me is just not convinced, im worried that there is going to be a point where iv tried so many things and so many people have tried to help but nothing works and im just guna be stuck like this, i cant escape these feelings its like a monster in my head, im always so exsausted from the panic and worry and feeling low, i cant eat a thing and keep being sick and sometimes feel like im guna crap myself too(sorry but its true) im constantly in tears and i just feel so alone and so helpless and lost and frightened!

I guess im not looking for answers cos no one seems to have them but i guess im just looking for abit of comfort from people who know what im going through as it really feels like this is the end for me and i feel so alone a helpless.

thank u for reading

[Schatmeisje]

gosh, i feel like that all the time. Try to remember that there are going to be good days and bad days with these disorders. I had a hard time accepting it at first, but now i just go with it, and i know that if i have 3-4 bad days , i just stay in bed, then i get up one of the following mornings feeling better. I had 3 days like you describe last week, then got up on the weekend and went out and felt better ( well, not better, but a hell of a lot better than i was).
You are doing all the right things, seeing a counsellor and CBT therapist. I also never know why i am panicking, i can just be totally relaxed watching a movie or something and spend the whole day having panic attacks. It will get better, and i know it feels like you have tried everything (i feel like this all the time, i keep thinking 'ive done everything i have been told to, why am i still anxious?') but i feel that slowly my good days are starting to outweigh the bad ones.
You wont be like this forever, and i tell myself that every single day to keep me motivated.
I hope you are feeling a bit better xxx