Struggling in Ohio(very long post)

[AnxiousDog]

Hi there everybody. My name is Jamie. For the last 10 years I have suffered with varying degrees of anxiety and occasionally depression follows. I had my first panic attack at 11 in the shower and even now as a 21 year old occasionally I still get them there. Over my teen years I was on just about every medicine you could be on.when I was about 16 I stopped taking meds. Fast forward to 21 years old and I'm again struggling very hard with it. 2 months ago I was prescribed buspar and it helped for a little while. Then I started to have these incredibly bizarre and just absurd dreams like mowing my carpet in the house. I would then wake up very quickly and be in a full blown panic. I recently went to my old doctor and she told me to ween off the buspar and prescribed me zoloft. I'm going on my third day with no buspar and I feel varying degrees of terrible. I get shaky and feel generally unwell, I also concentrate heavily on breathing and my heart which seems to palpitate and every time I feel that it makes me freak out. I got an ekg like two weeks ago and was promptly sent home. It seems like it only happens when I'm by myself. I'm trying my hardest to get by, I even went on a walk earlier and felt disoriented and just not like i did earlier this summer. I definitely can't hold a job feeling like this. I hope being around like minded people can ease my mind.

[Schatmeisje]

Hi jamie and welcome :-) I so understand the shower thing, my attacks got so bad i didnt shower for 2-3 months ( i didnt just stay dirty, i just had to go out side to the backyard and get in a freezing cold outdoor spa instead) but i am loads better in the shower now, and make myself do it eveyr day. A quick tip that works for me, is that when i start to panic in there, i look down and watch the drops of water hitting my skin and it has worked wonders for me so far :-) my mindfulness trainer taught me that one so it might be worth a try for you too. t just helps you to concentrate on what is 'actually' happening at that moement, rather than panicing. I get the palpitations too (not so bad now as i have learnt too ignore them pretty well now) but i do know it used to happen more to me when i comcentrated on my breathing too.
You are doing the right thing by getting out and walking.
Have you tried any therapy as yet?
Good luck and stay strong and there are loads of very helpful people on here who understand xx