Panicing about panicing?

[worrier123]

Last night i had a panic attack! i havnt had one for many years and my anxiety had been so much better than what it used to be, iv always found my anxiety levels higher the day after a night of heavy drinking, i used to mainly worry about having a heart attack if iv felt a chest pain or something but over the years iv goten used to it and learnt how to deal with it but this time it was different i dont know what bought it on which concerns me but i was led on my bed and closed my eyes cos i felt abit dizzy and not there in the head(as you do when u have a hangover) and in my mind it felt like my hands, arms and head were getting really big and i could feel them getting bigger! when i open my eyes of course everything was fine, but closed them again and the same thing, this made me feel weird and straight away this panic feeling came over me, it took me by such surprise if anything cos as i said i havnt had a panic insident like this for years, i tried to calm myself down by running a bath and trying to tell myself not to panic and not to be silly everything is fine im just hungover etc but wasnt working, i had thoughts of going crazy and loosing my mind and dying! pure fear swept over me and i felt paralized from pure terror of whatever it is my body was scared of, i was even started throwing up due being in so much terror and this i have never done before, my body went all cold and i was shaking all over as if i was having a fit, i had the dryest mouth ever etc etc. i went back to lay on my bed and put on some music on-anything i did to try and take my mind of panicing seemed to make it worse in some ways, the fear and panic shortly got worse, the thought of people seeing me in this state also makes the anxiety even higher but i decided to calmly tell me boyfriend what i was going through mainly cos it got to the stage where it thought i should call an ambulance....i was in so much state of panic and shock and fear that i couldnt even cry and i wanted to so badly...but couldnt!


a few hours later things calmed down, i went over to my mums for dinner and being with people took my mind off whatever it was, we just ate dinner and i started feeling abit cold and started shivering a little then just broke down in floods of tear, balling my eyes out to mum saying i dont want to go crazy i dont want to die! she took me upstairs and calmed me down and i told her everything(which does actually help if u talk to me people) thing is its so hard to explain how u feel and how the panic attack feels or why u feel like this, and even now i dont even really no what im worrying about but in my mind im still feeling very anxious that this is going to happen again and for no reason, as i said i hadnt had an attack for about 2 and abit years now and this panic was over something completly different which i think is what has shocked me.

its the day after now and i do feel better, im feeling very emotional because the panic and fear have passed but its left me very scared and confused. im worried now that im just going to keep panicing about panicing, if i think i dont want to have a panic attack or i dont want to feel like that again or knowing it could happen again at any time makes me feel anxious and then the symptoms come on and its just a visious circle, i feel let down by myself and slightly annoyed because i thought i was over all this crap and iv done really well in over coming these problems then out of the blue it happened

i dont no if theres any answers out there i dont even no why im writing this, maybe im doomed for a life of fear and need to except it, thanks for reading anyway

Kelly

[kellyzac]

Hiya, i can totally relate that is how all of my anxiety came on suddenly one night id suffered anxiety a couple of years ago which now seems mild compared. If it felt good to spill everything to your mom have you considered counceling? I get the panicking over panicking that is the cycle im trying to break now. If you have overcome it once it stands you in good stead to overcome it again.

[Anxiety beater]

Hi - panicking about panicking is exactly what happens in anxiety disorder - we become anxious about getting anxious!!! The fact that you've got over this before is one of the main things to hold onto - you are bigger than your anxiety, you've beaten it before, and you don't need to let it control your life. It's not uncommon for people getting over anxiety to have set-backs - it's not an easy thing to conquer, because we have to basically reprogramme ourselves not to respond with inappropriate anxiety to things that don't warrant it - it's like an automatic habit that can be very hard to break - but it's not impossible! The fact that you've had another panic attack isn't the end of the world - you've already proved that you can overcome this, you can do it again! Have faith in yourself. I wish you well.