Anxiety of being Best Man

[agb]

Hi, A friend of mine asked me to be best man for him nearly a year ago. This totally freaked me out but I accepted and hoped come nearer the event I would be ok.

It's three weeks away now and I am totally freaking out about it. I have massive work pressures and I had a total breakdown after the stag do (which went fairly well). I spent the day in tears and may partner took the day off work to be with me. My mother happened to come over that day and saw me in such a state. I've clearly worried her too.

I organised 17 lads on the stag do boating. This was epic but it went well. I was hoping to be more confident and I struggled to be authoritative and I was unable to stand and make a final speech before everyone left on the Sunday.

I have three massive fears for the day.
- How to look happy in the photos! Anxiety locks me up and makes me feel depressed. I don't know how I am going to look cheery in the pictures. It even makes me feel ill.
- The speech. OMG. I did one as an usher (wierd I know) as a friends wedding and I literally didn't sleep the night before.

I work from home on my own and rarely socialise without alcohol. I'm going to see the doctor to see if I can get some beta blockers for the speech. I'm in fear of even phoning the groome to ask my duties.

Has anyone else been though this? Can you give me any advice? I just don't know how I can pick up my confidense and nail it. I fear people willl look at me and thing what the hell is wrong with him looking all miserable on his best friends day.

Aaargh.. I should have declined from the start but we have had this agreement since we were childern that we would be each other best men.
I have no doubt that I am drink dependant socially

[acasey]

haha i had the same problem! i was asked to be maid of honor in my bff's wedding. i was freaking out about the same things! i was thinking how am i gonna fake my way through the day. well the wedding was last weekend, and i can honestly say i a had a great time! i just went with the flow. i had moments where i felt high anxiety, but i did not give myself more anxiety with fretting about how i felt. i accepted how i felt, and just took in what was going on around me and enjoyed every minute of it! i didn't have to fake at all. i actually had a good time and you can really see that in the pictures. i also had to give a speech. i was a nervous wreck! i wrote down what i was gonna say ahead of time, so that made me feel better. and i just looked at my best friend the whole time. i didn't even stutter, lol. moment before i thought i was gonna have a panic attack, but once i was actually standing up andn reading i really got into what i was saying and forgot about everyone else. and it actually went really well. if you just go with the flow and accept how you feel you will end up having a good time. just dont sit there the wole day worrying about how you feel. however you feel is how you feel, and always remember that anxiety is a internal thing. noone else knows what is going on inside your head unless you tell them. so stop worrying that people will notice your anxiety, they won't!!! good luck, you will do great!