batgirl
08-09-2011, 10:06 PM
Hello everyone. I am new to this and I am so happy to find this forum. I am a 49 year old woman with panic disorder. I am on medication and it seems to be mostly under control, but I do have bad days. Tonight I am anxious because I have a twitch in my chin. It is visible. Anything like that scares me. I feel so stupid when I get upset over little things. The anxiety is probably the cause, but I tell myself that it could be a stroke or a brain tumor.
I had my first panic attack when I was 20 and I didn't even know what it was. I had them off and on for several years without treatment. I would go to the ER thinking I was dying. My first husband was not very sympathetic. When I was 27, I finally started on an anti-depressant called Tofranil and I also took Xanax. I was panic attack free from May of 1989 until April of 2010. I was only on the medicine for two years, but still didn't have any panic attacks and very little anxiety for all those years.
My father died in early 2009 and my mother died in the Fall of 2010. The panic attacks started in April, 2010 right after I got diagnosed with a benign tumor in my abdomen. I went to the ER several times and finally was given Cymbalta to take. I couldn't take it. The side effects scared me. Then the doctor gave me Zoloft and Ativan. I never took the Zoloft, but I've been on the Ativan for almost a year and it helps a lot.
I still have many anxious days. I am afraid of everything. I was afraid to take the Zoloft, even though I know I need it. I get afraid if I have any unusual physical symptoms. It makes me think I am going to die. I am overweight and I am afraid of having a heart attack or stroke, but I eat when I get anxious, so that doesn't help.
I am just a big mess. I hope talking on this Forum will help me. I am too young to feel so old. I don't want to go through life being so afraid. Thanks for reading my story.
I had my first panic attack when I was 20 and I didn't even know what it was. I had them off and on for several years without treatment. I would go to the ER thinking I was dying. My first husband was not very sympathetic. When I was 27, I finally started on an anti-depressant called Tofranil and I also took Xanax. I was panic attack free from May of 1989 until April of 2010. I was only on the medicine for two years, but still didn't have any panic attacks and very little anxiety for all those years.
My father died in early 2009 and my mother died in the Fall of 2010. The panic attacks started in April, 2010 right after I got diagnosed with a benign tumor in my abdomen. I went to the ER several times and finally was given Cymbalta to take. I couldn't take it. The side effects scared me. Then the doctor gave me Zoloft and Ativan. I never took the Zoloft, but I've been on the Ativan for almost a year and it helps a lot.
I still have many anxious days. I am afraid of everything. I was afraid to take the Zoloft, even though I know I need it. I get afraid if I have any unusual physical symptoms. It makes me think I am going to die. I am overweight and I am afraid of having a heart attack or stroke, but I eat when I get anxious, so that doesn't help.
I am just a big mess. I hope talking on this Forum will help me. I am too young to feel so old. I don't want to go through life being so afraid. Thanks for reading my story.