seashell1025
07-30-2011, 03:45 PM
Hello everyone i am new on here and im looking for some help because i dont know if im the only one that has experienced this stuff. im looking forward to talkign to people on here. first of all his is super long but i really need to tell someone this. I am 15 and ive been having panic attacks since i was 8 years old.. Ive ruled it out to then because my first panic attack experience was right after i had surgery on my ears. I had had surgery on them before, but i had moved to the area recently, and so i had it at a new hospital, and honestly, the nurses were so scary. Haha, anyways, i honestly never started talking to people about what i thought were “major issues” until like last december… And now almost every time theres a major. Or even minor event in my life, my panic attacks would spring up again.. And for me its been like every other year… Except for the first initial few ones that i had in 2nd grade… In third grade i had them because my mom was going back to college to be a teacher.. And she had been a stay at home mom until that point, so i missed her… In 5th grade when i got them it was because i was struggling to find who my friends were, and it was pretty stressful for me, and i felt lonely… In 6th grade, i was just starting middle school, and that can be a pretty scary thing to cope with…. And then this year in ninth grade my panic attacks started showing up, first of all because of all the stress of literallly having hours of homework everysingle night…. And i believe that wore me down, and i actually got sick. (sinus infection).. And the attacks went on.. Also turns out that for the past year before, my mom had a slight state of menopausal depression.. So she wasnt really around to support me too much during that time.. So anxiety sort of runs in the family, but i got it worse, because she didnt freak out about as many things as i do. I believe that i have signs of agoraphobia because i literally am afraid of open spaces... especially at school. i like die. theres places that i have to sit depending on which classroom that im in otherwise i have a panic attack. Also at church, it just got worse this year though. ive been sitting in the 4th seat from the front ever since i was nine years old... but now whenever i try to sit there, i think too much and just keep contemplating on the fact that im trapped right in the midddle of everyone and so now i sit in the back. I just recently told my mom about all of this.. i should have sooner, but i was afraid she would think i was crazy.. and im always afraid of people thinking im crazy. I also am like a real downer person. because im afraid that if im like happy about something, that something bad is dooming right in front of me.. i can never be positive, or so it seems! are any of you guys on here like this? okay, well i think this is enough babbling on, but please if anyone reads this, help me out!
Thanks
michelle
Thanks
michelle