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View Full Version : New in Town! Small business owner with parent problems



MagicBeans
07-12-2011, 10:47 AM
Hi everyone,

So pleased to find this forum. I'll explain a bit about whats going on, I'll try and keep it as brief as I can.

I run my own small business and get all the stress and anxiety that comes with that territory. But, stress within the business I find can be kinda useful here and there and I can very much deal with it. I'm very proud of myself that I can run this little business well and get it to break even already, after only trading for 7 months. Woo!

But, I'm really starting to falter, and its not really the fault of my business. I'm in a sort of unusual situation which I think is why I'm finding it difficult to resolve - I've started this business in my old home town (thought it would be better to have a shop in an area I knew very well) and I stay with my parents some of the week. They also fronted the capital to start the business, so really this is their investment. Which I think is where the problem comes from.

For them when you're young you WORK. work, work, work. No time for anything else. You must work - if you take time off its because you don't care, and if you don't care, you're an ungrateful little brat. But the mental and physical symptoms I've been experiencing are really saying otherwise!! I have IBS that's been taking me to hell and back, massive back and shoulder problems, shaking, shortness of breath, nausea, tightness in my chest, tired all the time, and I've started to get hayfever for the first time in my life thats been brought on by it all. (I told my mum today that I've started to get hayfever... she said "good" - I mean, what the hell). Also feeling very claustrophobic, panicky, paranoid, and for the first time in my life I've been getting so, so angry. I get mad at everything. Even the people walking past my shop who I've never met. I guess its because I feel so trapped in this freaking place, and I see people going out, meeting their friends, going for lunch, shopping for holidays, and generally living their lives.

But if I said anything about this to my parents, they would just say "pull yourself together" and "don't be pathetic" as they have before. Everyone says "oh they must be so proud of you", but seriously, they're not. And I don't know why. My partners family are so lovely and supportive, but my parents don't like them and would be massively offended if I said I was going to stay with my partner's Dad for a week.

No idea how to start making this better.

Feels great to let it all out!!

crimsonrose
07-13-2011, 04:37 PM
You are a grown up. Just because your parent invested money in your business, It is still your business. Don't let them run you to the ground you need to take time for yourself. There is more to life than work, dont let it pass you by or you will be full of regret. We have to fight for our lives. I just joined this sight but i will not give up and go crazy and you cant let fear or your parent take over your life.

Jsay31
07-13-2011, 04:51 PM
I think the source of a lot of your problems is your connection with your parents. You wouldn't be friends or hang around someone who treated you the way ur parents do....why stay around them. Life is to short and full of day to day turmoil to knowingly put yourself in a place where you know the people with drag you down. I would go and stay with your partners parents for a bit.....there is a lot to be said about a comfortable and positive atmosphere....and it can have a very good benefit on your health as well. Hope things turn around for ya!