undiagnosed anxiety

[reminess]

Hi everyone my name is reminess. I am viewing your site for the first time today.

I know that I have clinical depression (no meds, no funds) but it wasn't until recently that I realized that I have anxiety also. I think it may be GAD. I always wondered why I was frightened of being home alone. I moved into my house 3 yrs ago and when ever my daughter went to visit/ sleepover god-mother's house or summer vacation to florida I had this extreme fear. I was scared to be home alone. All of these situations would enter my mind.... I would have the baby sleep with me. That was my comfort. Funny since neither could do anything anyway but it was the fact that I wasn't alone. At night before we sleep I normally have to check the alarm at least 2-3 times, more if I've forgotten that I checked it.

I went to real estate school last yr and I withdraw from everyone. I made 2-3 friends but other than that I didn't really talk to anyone. I grew up that way. Meaning that I tend to withdraw if I don't know people and I'm not comfortable in large group settings. Recently, at church they had a different service on sat night. They wanted us to get into groups of 6 and pray for eachother etc. I felt the anxiety as soon as they said it. everyone started praying for eachother and as they were, I was thinking what i could and would say and when my turn came I did so badly because I also have a fear of speaking publically. I forced myself to speak- not wanting to but because I felt backed in a corner and because I want to make steps to conquer my fears. But I was so disappointed with the outcome. I can listen in a group but contribution is something else.

These are just a few of my situations. I just want some feed back from you all. Maybe today, will be the start of the rest of my life. I am tired of feeling this way. I plan on seeking help so that I can help my oldest daughter who has ADHD. I've become tired of being tired and I guess I am now ready. Thank you all for listening :tongue:

[reminess]

:( I thought someone would talk to me. Guess I'm on the wrong forum. I was looking for someone with some of the similar issues that I've been experiencing. Someone who I could talk to and relate to. Someone to share with. Someone to heal with. Thanks for listening.

[duddits]

Hi and welcome to Anxiety Forum, Reminess. I glad am that you're actually looking for answers and support in an effort to beat anxiety. Just from reading your initial post it very much looks like you have social anxiety (which is what I have) or GAD, as you said. However, the thing is not to self-diagnosis, because I could come up with 3-4 different mental health disorders I think I have. Have you taken the SPIN test? Anyway, you can find it here:http://www.paxilcr.com/Social_Anxiety_Disorder_Test.jsp.

Also I encourage you to check out our Resources & Articles forum to helpful places that will steer you in the right direction if you're looking for actual treatment from a health provider.

[randyttp]

hello reminess.. glad to hear your tired of this and doing something about it!! ;)


Strange thing that happens, when you really want to be healed, ready to be healed and take the first step. Somehow it will just come at the right moment, it will come from within though. Dont rely on others or other things to heal those worry-bugs :tongue:

i think your on the verge on hitting peace... balance! Its gotta get bad before you can know how good it is. err whatever.. im just blabbing. Just know you can get better and will. Learn.

[reminess]

Randyttp and duddits,

Thank you both for your reply. I did take the test and it indicated that I may have social anxiety disorder. I have allowed my fears to rule my life for so long that I'm unwilling to allow it any longer. I am tired of being fearful. I want to enjoy the rest of my life. In my church I learned the meaning of fear. False Evidence Appearing Real. Life and its lessons are enough to keep us back to a certain extent. I don't want fear to be the reason my life isn't what I want it to be. My next step is finding the tools to deal with this and then over come it. It may or may not disappear but It should decrease greatly. Living in fear of what ever is no fun.

There are times when I am open to new people. But for the most part I'm not. I like silent recognition. And I'm afraid of looking stupid. I remember my real estate class. I would have questions and I always waited for someone else to ask them. Or I would wait until after class or a break and ask the teacher myself. I'm more of a one on one type of person. But all of this fear is keeping me from being the person I desire to be so......I'm ready for change.

My daughter is the total opposite from me. She is so outgoing. I love that quality about her. At school programs you can hear her above all the other students. She can talk to anyone. I am so thankful she is this way. I would hate for her to live in my shoes.

Anyway, Thanks again and thanks for listening

[MissBrownEyes]

you are not alone, keep loking around and reading other ppls post and reaching out for h elp you are on the right track already! 8)