New to the forums

[Kiara]

Okay hi everyone!

I'm 20 years old and have been struggling with anxious feeling since I was 14 or 15. It has always just been something I have dealt with, and I have always felt it has just been something I could deal with on my own. Recently, well it has gotten too hard to handle on my own, and it has taken me a lot to admit I need assistance (and even joining this forum).
It spurred up at 14 or 15 due to marijuana use. I quit when I was aged 15 due to anxiety attacks. The anxiety continued, and when I look back I was probably predisposed to anxiety, as even when I was 12 I can remember being overly anxious.
It has gotten a lot tougher over the last 6-7 months as I have moved towns, therefore I have lost a lot of social interactions and social support. I now find in crowded situations (such as being in the supermarket) makes me incredibly anxious and brings on anxiety/panic attacks. Unfortunately, I will drink alcohol in social situations so I feel confident, and to just relax!
I guess another reason I find it tough to admit and seek assistance, is due to the field I work and study in. I am a child protection worker, and I deal with the realities of anxiety everyday (and unfortunately, typically the negative ones). Some of the challenges with this job also increases the anxiety. I am also studying a Graduate Diploma of Psychology, which means when I graduate next year I can work as a psychologist and will be working with clients who experience anxiety themselves.

I am afraid the doctor will think I am being meladramatic, and should be able to sort it out myself! I started taking St John's Wart over the last few weeks, but I haven't seen a change. I am uncertain of taking traditional medication due to their side effects (mainly weight gain and reduced libido, which I struggle with as it is, and if they were to get worse, I think I would become even more anxious). But I don't know what else to do, I can't sleep properly, I become incredibly anxious over the smallest things, I twitch (which makes my muscles sore), I can't concentrate (and my work and studies have reflected this) and I cannot interact with those closest to me.


Ahhhh anyway, that is me! I just want to meet people who feel the same, because anxiety is a pretty lonely feeling.

[Motherof2]

Hello Kiara!

It is a very lonesome feeling, even though there are many others that suffer through it.
I have a husband and 2 small children, and I tend to feel so guilty about having anxiety, depression and panic attacks. It would be nice if there were some magic pill or words that would just snap us out of it. As we both know, that is not the case. I just recently started with mine, about a little less than a month ago.
It does seem, when you are going through this, that no one else understands where you are coming from. I read the stories and have gone through this when my mother had anxiety, and it still seems so foreign.
It does not help that my husband, kids and I live in a town where we really do not have friends or people that we hang out with. It is just the four of us. I can not imagine what you are feeling right now, having moved to a new town. I hope that you are able to find the help and support that you need. It is hard to suffer through this, when it does feel so lonely.
I had started taking St. John's Wart, but the doctor decided to put me on Prozac and Xanax. The Prozac I take everyday, and the Xanax only when I am having a panic attack. Which I try to control myself, because Xanax is highly addictive.
I will tell you one thing, family support is so important. My husband holds me while I cry, and my mother and grandmother remind me that it is just an illness and not what defines me. The both of them have gone through anxiety, and know where I stand. I hope and pray that you to will get support and understanding to help you through this illness.