Anyone have any advice/similar feelings?

[Jaseis]

Hi all,
I was wondering if anyone had the same sort of feelings as me.
I've been dealing with anxiety for a few years now, and it used to torment me so much that the thought of the future just terrified me. One of my worst fears is looking into the future because it just makes me frustrated and restless. But something has changed recently, and I feel like there's no point in anything now...when I have an anxiety attack, I eventually just become extremely upset or go through weird mood changes...is it normal for anxiety to take form like this? It often makes me drink a lot or act recklessly and looking back, it's a bit scary. I can't explain these different, inconsistent moods. It's like I look back on a different person and I don't know why I'm like this.
It's gotten to the point where worrying has grated me down so much that I guess I have given up. I just let it consume me now instead of attempting to fight it and now I'm starting to lose interest in many things...it's far safer and easier for me to curl up in bed and watch t.v. Rather than face reality.
Also, has anyone else got a terrible fear of eternity or going crazy? Or never sleeping again is one I hate too, which makes me terrified to sleep sometimes, in case I have a problem with sleeping and it will never go away. I put on an ok face on when I am at college and sometimes it does work and I manage to forget how low I feel, but it hits me later and I just freeze...sit and cry and feel really hopeless.
I just want to be able to be happy about the future again. I don't want to face every day worrying about how I'm going to cope for this day.
Sorry for rambling

[belle64]

I can relate to you, last week I just didn't care about anything, was eating and eating but didn't even care that I might put on weight (which is very odd for me!) All I wanted to do was just sleep, I'd pray for the day to go. This week I've been feeling a little better, self help was suggested to me so I thought I'd give it a chance, I think its helping with the anxiety attacks.
BELLE

[Jaseis]

Hey Belle, I think I'm scared of self help in case it doesn't work - I don't want to face that disappointment and frustration. Had another panic attack today, I think it was because we were made to work in groups at college of new people. The usual - sweaty palms, looking around, stuttering, confusion, headache then the heavy breathing started and I just had to get out if there. I really feel like I'm getting nowhere with this :( I'm in bed again now, avoiding as much as I can. I really don't know what to do.

[belle64]

The self help I use is on anxieties.com
Give it a try maybe when ure on a higher mood? Its really helped with the panic attacks. Its ok if it dosnt work, there's plenty more stuff out there :) past few weeks have been a living hell for me but I'm feeling more hopeful now. Really understand about your college experience, I find it hard to even go to the shop over the road!
BELLE

[Jaseis]

I just want this crap to pass. I've completely forgotten who I used to be and that scares me to death. Will I ever be happy or the same again?

[Nan]

I don't know that I have anything to help you, but I will give you some advice I use. I imagine this panic/anxiety as a competition. I will NOT let it have power over me. I may have a bad moment or bad days, but I will NOT let it beat me. I imagine this anxiety as a physical "thing" and when I need to, I just think about pushing it down the hill and telling it to get lost.

And just remember, that even though it sucks, there are others who feel the say way you do and others who understand how to you completely.

[belle64]

I have the same question, I hope to feel "normal" again one day soon. I know what you're going through, every minute is a struggle, YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
BELLE