hermes
04-27-2011, 09:32 PM
Hi, any help at all will be greatly appreciated! I've had horrible health anxiety all my life (usually convince myself I have something extremely unpleasant and fatal, no comment). However, in recent years I've managed to cope with it ok, except when I am stressed. Recently, have been very stressed with work, and also my youngest son is going overseas for a year, and I have been really worried about him. I am also pre menopausal. Anyway, a couple of weeks ago, a person who I have met once or twice, got diagnosed with an extremely aggressive cancer, and was dead in a week; she went from feeling tired one day to hospital to dead.
Now this has really really really freaked me out, and I can't stop thinking about it. The worst part was that someone said she must have had cancer for years, but then had a bad reaction to a flu shot, and this "kicked it off". I also had a flu shot, so freaked out even more (though didn't have a bad reaction, but have had neck and shoulder pain and sciatica for weeks). That horrible feeling of, I can only describe it as, dread. Now I am having palpitations, hot flushes, waking up in the middle of the night and not able to get back to sleep; worse neck and back pain, and to boot, I have come down with a bad cold/sinus infection. The worst bit is, I can't concentrate, and have lost my appetite, and have lost half a kilo...which normally I would be ecstatic about, but this morning I stood on the scale and was horrified...because, as all true hypochondriacs know, weight loss can be a symptom of all sorts of dreadful diseases (and of course, of anxiety!)
Now, I am *almost* certain this is just anxiety (as I am perfectly healthy, have recently had normal blood tests, have regular mammograms, skin cancer, pap smears etc; also I am about 20 years younger than the other woman, and have a totally different lifestyle, genetic origin, family history etc...my family are all long lived, and mostly die of heart disease; though I do have a strong family history of anxiety, um) but this has not convinced me one bit. I went to the doctor and he told me I needed counselling!!! But because it is flu season here, he gave me all of about 5 minutes, and he didnt exactly examine me, just looked in my ears and took my temperature. So I don't know how much credence to give to his diagnosis.
Now, logically, I know I am more than likely being extremely stupid, particularly given that the only things that calm me are long walks and alcohol (no comment, I am trying not to use alcohol as a crutch, besides it makes the palpitations worse). If anyone can give me some advice, I shall be very very grateful.
Now this has really really really freaked me out, and I can't stop thinking about it. The worst part was that someone said she must have had cancer for years, but then had a bad reaction to a flu shot, and this "kicked it off". I also had a flu shot, so freaked out even more (though didn't have a bad reaction, but have had neck and shoulder pain and sciatica for weeks). That horrible feeling of, I can only describe it as, dread. Now I am having palpitations, hot flushes, waking up in the middle of the night and not able to get back to sleep; worse neck and back pain, and to boot, I have come down with a bad cold/sinus infection. The worst bit is, I can't concentrate, and have lost my appetite, and have lost half a kilo...which normally I would be ecstatic about, but this morning I stood on the scale and was horrified...because, as all true hypochondriacs know, weight loss can be a symptom of all sorts of dreadful diseases (and of course, of anxiety!)
Now, I am *almost* certain this is just anxiety (as I am perfectly healthy, have recently had normal blood tests, have regular mammograms, skin cancer, pap smears etc; also I am about 20 years younger than the other woman, and have a totally different lifestyle, genetic origin, family history etc...my family are all long lived, and mostly die of heart disease; though I do have a strong family history of anxiety, um) but this has not convinced me one bit. I went to the doctor and he told me I needed counselling!!! But because it is flu season here, he gave me all of about 5 minutes, and he didnt exactly examine me, just looked in my ears and took my temperature. So I don't know how much credence to give to his diagnosis.
Now, logically, I know I am more than likely being extremely stupid, particularly given that the only things that calm me are long walks and alcohol (no comment, I am trying not to use alcohol as a crutch, besides it makes the palpitations worse). If anyone can give me some advice, I shall be very very grateful.