Need help fast....anxiety ruining my life

[jti1998]

New user here seeking advice...I will give you some background information of myself and hopefully I can get the proper advice...BTW I have also tried Hypnotherapy along with vitamins such as GABA, Kava, passion flower, etc....(in combination) but with no results after months of use.

I'm an alcoholic who has been sober for around a year or so. I starting drinking heavily around 16, i'm now 28. Along with alcohol I was a heavy drug user/addict. I literally used/experimented/abused every drug known to man including lower tabs and xanax. I was addicted to cocaine for two years but then quit for good after a near overdose. Smoked marijuana every day. Took lower tabs for back pain (sports injury) and xanax to calm my nerves. Experimented with extasy, LSD, MDMA, etc...

I have been sober from all drugs for over 4-5 years. After quiting I felt great until January of 2007 about 2-3 years after quiting. I experienced an extreme panic attack which sent me to the hospital. About every 3-4 months afterwards I had a recurring panic attack.

Since the first panic attack I have had issues with heart palpataions, chest pain, severe social anxiety, tremors (hands), severe ringing in ears, severe test anxiety, etc...

Thinking back to before I starting abusing drugs and alcohol I always was and upbeat social character who loved attention and being around people. In school I was an honor student but now in college I'm the exact opposite. However, I am not depressed and am actually very happy and feel good about myself but the anxiety that I feel inside is horrible. Now I am having trouble "connecting the dots" or linking learned material to homework and tests and even learning/understanding topics. I do pay attention and my mind does not wander.

At the University I am attending they have a "free" Psychiatry Clinic that I have visited since 2009. I told my first Nurse everything stated above. She diagnosed me with GAD, severe SAD, depression and panic disorder. She gave me Zoloft, lorazepam and inderal. Within days of taking the Zoloft I could not sleep and my anxiety levels were off the chart. However, I quit taking Zoloft (doctors orders) but continued with lorazepam and inderal and that made a huge difference. I felt great and in control of my life. However she soon had me quit taking that combination and started me on Lexapro and inderal which had the same side effect as Zoloft, so after weeks of torture I quit taking that med.

On my next appointment the Nurse informed me that she could no longer continue to see me because she was baffled that none of the medicines helped me, infact they made my condtion worse. I stated to her that the only medication that has ever worked for anxiety was inderal and lorazepam but she would not prescribed those meds to me. I was referred to a Doctor at the same clinic and she said I could not take SSRI's or SNRI's. I am now taking Neurontin 300mg 3 times a day. It's been over a week since I started and I have become severly manic along with uncontrolable tremors, chest pain, mood swings, hand/finger numbness(tingling), memory loss, etc..

BTW I have had several blood tests and they all check out ok.

The anxiety has ruined my social life as well as my academic life. My grades have dropped to low C's and at the College of Engineering this is borderline failing. It became so bad that one time I had to withdrawl from the University for medical reasons. However I cannot continue to do this if I want to graduate within the next 10 years. I'm a freakin senior with only a year left to go!!

Should I see another doctor off campus the get another opinion? Why would a doctor not prescribe me something that I know works (lorazepam&Inderal)? I only experimented with xanax in the past, never abused. Sorry for such a long post but I wanted to present a clear depiction of my past and present issues. Last question. If I am unable to take SSRI's or SNRI's wouldn't that present a major clue to a proper diagnosis and which medications I should take?

Thanks

[m lee]

New user here seeking advice...I will give you some background information of myself and hopefully I can get the proper advice...BTW I have also tried Hypnotherapy along with vitamins such as GABA, Kava, passion flower, etc....(in combination) but with no results after months of use.

I'm an alcoholic who has been sober for around a year or so. I starting drinking heavily around 16, i'm now 28. Along with alcohol I was a heavy drug user/addict. I literally used/experimented/abused every drug known to man including lower tabs and xanax. I was addicted to cocaine for two years but then quit for good after a near overdose. Smoked marijuana every day. Took lower tabs for back pain (sports injury) and xanax to calm my nerves. Experimented with extasy, LSD, MDMA, etc...

I have been sober from all drugs for over 4-5 years. After quiting I felt great until January of 2007 about 2-3 years after quiting. I experienced an extreme panic attack which sent me to the hospital. About every 3-4 months afterwards I had a recurring panic attack.

Since the first panic attack I have had issues with heart palpataions, chest pain, severe social anxiety, tremors (hands), severe ringing in ears, severe test anxiety, etc...

Thinking back to before I starting abusing drugs and alcohol I always was and upbeat social character who loved attention and being around people. In school I was an honor student but now in college I'm the exact opposite. However, I am not depressed and am actually very happy and feel good about myself but the anxiety that I feel inside is horrible. Now I am having trouble "connecting the dots" or linking learned material to homework and tests and even learning/understanding topics. I do pay attention and my mind does not wander.

At the University I am attending they have a "free" Psychiatry Clinic that I have visited since 2009. I told my first Nurse everything stated above. She diagnosed me with GAD, severe SAD, depression and panic disorder. She gave me Zoloft, lorazepam and inderal. Within days of taking the Zoloft I could not sleep and my anxiety levels were off the chart. However, I quit taking Zoloft (doctors orders) but continued with lorazepam and inderal and that made a huge difference. I felt great and in control of my life. However she soon had me quit taking that combination and started me on Lexapro and inderal which had the same side effect as Zoloft, so after weeks of torture I quit taking that med.

On my next appointment the Nurse informed me that she could no longer continue to see me because she was baffled that none of the medicines helped me, infact they made my condtion worse. I stated to her that the only medication that has ever worked for anxiety was inderal and lorazepam but she would not prescribed those meds to me. I was referred to a Doctor at the same clinic and she said I could not take SSRI's or SNRI's. I am now taking Neurontin 300mg 3 times a day. It's been over a week since I started and I have become severly manic along with uncontrolable tremors, chest pain, mood swings, hand/finger numbness(tingling), memory loss, etc..

BTW I have had several blood tests and they all check out ok.

The anxiety has ruined my social life as well as my academic life. My grades have dropped to low C's and at the College of Engineering this is borderline failing. It became so bad that one time I had to withdrawl from the University for medical reasons. However I cannot continue to do this if I want to graduate within the next 10 years. I'm a freakin senior with only a year left to go!!

Should I see another doctor off campus the get another opinion? Why would a doctor not prescribe me something that I know works (lorazepam&Inderal)? I only experimented with xanax in the past, never abused. Sorry for such a long post but I wanted to present a clear depiction of my past and present issues. Last question. If I am unable to take SSRI's or SNRI's wouldn't that present a major clue to a proper diagnosis and which medications I should take?

Thanks

This is my story almost exactly. I am 28 and have had the same history in my late teens and early twenties experimenting with just about every drug out there. I used from about 17 to 22 and then quit after a bad experience with an overdose of extasy. I too felt perfectly fine for about a year and a half to two years, and then out of no where I started having these "attacks" of not being able to breathe and truly feeling like I was dying. They became more and more frequent and intense and basically crippled me to a point and have kind of ruined my life. They come on any time randomly. I have seen doctors over the years, had blood tests, a CAT scan of my brain at one point, and been to the emergency room more than once. They never seem to find anything noticeably wrong, but they also never seemed too concerned either. I have been prescribed lexapro and other similar meds years ago, but like you, could not take them because it just made everything worse. I agree, that stuff was absolute hell.
I've been dealing with this stuff for 6 years now and have tried to get better on my own, because I have a phobia of pills of any kind now, probably because of the adverse effects of the anxiety meds I tried and possibly some kind of emotional scarring of past drug use and regrets. I have fears that the extasy or LSD or something screwed up my head somehow because I also remember how I use to feel and the way I use to look at things before all this started. It sucks.
I too was an alcoholic for years and quit this past year because the hangovers became severely unbearable. I feel like I am literally on deaths door after drinking even a moderate amount. I assume that this is from the panic disorder, but could also be liver damage from the drug use. I don't know.
I don't have any answers for you and I'm sorry about that. I just got on here to see if there were any other people dealing with the same things and apparently there are unfortunately a lot. I happen to click on your story here and I identified with you so much for obvious reasons, I just thought I'd share mine with you too. Maybe it would make you feel a little better in the way reading about your experience made me. I wish/hope that there's something out there to fix this stuff, but i guess it's cool to know that I am not alone.
Best wishes mate - Matt

[m lee]

This is my story almost exactly. I am 28 and have had the same history in my late teens and early twenties experimenting with just about every drug out there. I used from about 17 to 22 and then quit after a bad experience with an overdose of extasy. I too felt perfectly fine for about a year and a half to two years, and then out of no where I started having these "attacks" of not being able to breathe and truly feeling like I was dying. They became more and more frequent and intense and basically crippled me to a point and have kind of ruined my life. They come on any time randomly. I have seen doctors over the years, had blood tests, a CAT scan of my brain at one point, and been to the emergency room more than once. They never seem to find anything noticeably wrong, but they also never seemed too concerned either. I have been prescribed lexapro and other similar meds years ago, but like you, could not take them because it just made everything worse. I agree, that stuff was absolute hell.
I've been dealing with this stuff for 6 years now and have tried to get better on my own, because I have a phobia of pills of any kind now, probably because of the adverse effects of the anxiety meds I tried and possibly some kind of emotional scarring of past drug use and regrets. I have fears that the extasy or LSD or something screwed up my head somehow because I also remember how I use to feel and the way I use to look at things before all this started. It sucks.
I too was an alcoholic for years and quit this past year because the hangovers became severely unbearable. I feel like I am literally on deaths door after drinking even a moderate amount. I assume that this is from the panic disorder, but could also be liver damage from the drug use. I don't know.
I don't have any answers for you and I'm sorry about that. I just got on here to see if there were any other people dealing with the same things and apparently there are unfortunately a lot. I happen to click on your story here and I identified with you so much for obvious reasons, I just thought I'd share mine with you too. Maybe it would make you feel a little better in the way reading about your experience made me. I wish/hope that there's something out there to fix this stuff, but i guess it's cool to know that I am not alone.
Best wishes mate - Matt

[just1]

I am not a professional so I don't want to give away false or fake advice. So far, all of the advice I've given here were all things I knew about. Your problems are very different.

If I were you, I would follow what this forum has been doing. (what I mean is)

If you got the welcome email from this forum, I'm pretty sure you read about the three products they were advertising (and still are). Anyway, the first book "Panic Puzzle" is what I would recommend for you. It's a great book that focuses on getting better without taking a bunch of medication and pills. You can read more about it at - http://tinyurl.com/panicpuzzlecd

I sure do hope I helped!

You can check out my blog as well for some more small tips you can use to overcome anxiety.- http://howtostoppanicattacksinstantly.blogspot.com

Hope I Helped...:)

God Bless

[jti1998]

Thank you to those that have replied.....Here is an update....I had another blood test and urine test and everything checked out OK....I told my doctor what was happening to me with the Neurontin and she like the nurse I was seeing in the past became almost angry with ME that the meds were not working....At this particular moment she had two people sit in on our meeting, a College of Medicine Proffessor/Doctor who specializes in medicine along with a doctorial student in the same field....They were just as confused as I was....The only link I could provide them was that most of the SSRI's and SSNRI's I had been given have slight to moderate stimulating effects, which is something I DO NOT NEED!....However they shrugged their heads and decided to put me on Cymbalta 30mg per day and sent me away....At first I felt ok (2-3 days), well after two weeks I again am having horrible tremors, extremely high anxiety, 1 sever panic attack, etc.....The day I had my panic attack was horrible...I had to sit infront/around a group of ten students in a graduate level class shaking like a leaf, stuttering, etc....I felt like I was about to pass out and lasted 2 hours after class....

Even though my last post went into detail about my past I would like to talk about my anxiety when not on meds....

I can generally tolerate my day to day life whether buzzing around campus infront of thousands of students or just sitting around the apartment....My anxiety is a roller coaster....Somedays its gone, others moderate, some severe and sometime light.....One odd thing I have noticed is that certain situations that would make a "normal" person feel fearful, scared or anxious usualy makes me more calm and calculated....ie walking home at night and being confronted by "bad people", sparring in martial arts, or other events such as first responder related incidents...I do like being around people and enjoy interactions, just not when i'm feeling anxiety...I appear to be calm but on the inside I am a nervous wreck with severe physical symptoms such as feeling sick to my stomach, fast and hard heart rate, seizure like tremors (especially bad in my face...lips, cheeks, brow, etc....)

In the past I have attended many one-on-one hypnotherapy sessions which did help out a great deal...We covered relaxation techniques, GAD, and SAD...However, this is not a cure just a weekly treatment but it did do wonders...I think I have decided to stop seeing the doctors on campus and seek help elsewhere including a local hypnotherapist....I believe at this time this will be my best option....I almost feel that the doctors on campus are using me for medical prescription trials (bad joke, sorry)....I have read many books on how to cope and understand anxiety/panic attack but they really haven't helped....Like I know that I am not dying or that nothing bad will happen, but that has not helped in controlling or limiting the axiety....Breathing techniques have not worked either....I have also tried yoga and meditation with no results....

One thing that I am currently doing that might help is playing tennis again after 5 years along with quiting smoking....Also I am going to try to eat more healthy foods particulary staying away from sugars and stick to organic foods....

But when I see my new doctor(s) should I be completely honest with them about my past or try to start on a "clean slate"?

Sorry for another long post but I have alot on my mind and I am constantly analyzing my situation...



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