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missy
09-26-2006, 12:32 AM
:unsure: hi,i have been agorpobic for longer than i even realizied. i am now also a alcoholic. i've been to rehab. twice. almost kicked out last time because of anxitie.i'm for once really trying to stop drinking.i'm doing well untill bed time, then my heart rate sky rockets. so, i've been having to have a few drinks at bedtime.so,basically i'm still needing alcohol.i am 35 i have 4 chidern 19,16,11,3, i am in my third marrige.not going so well.i've been on several different meds.,they made me very ill.i found out that i am allergic to many meds.i want my life back. my once loving husband know longer cares.he's turned mean. i can't say that i blame him. i now realize i need to figure out some how ,how to get over this.i deserve a good life. i am a great person.knowone can take that from me.my childern need me.the one yr. old is type1 diabetise.he needs a high leval of care .i give him the best of care ,but my phobia makes it difficult.because i don't drive very offten.that means my husband takes care of apps.sometimes i get some strength for a few months,it always seems to leave.if my husband ever leaves me i will lose my children and be homeless i am trying to prepare myself for this.I FEEL SO BAD THAT THEASE WONDERFUL CHILDERN ENDED UP WITH ME.I ALSO WISH THAT MY HUSBAND STILL CARED ABOUT ME.I MISS HIM.HELP PLEASE!!!

JimLucky
09-29-2006, 07:03 AM
Dear missy I can relate to your life very much.I am alcoholic and agrophobic manic depresive.I ben in recovery 12 years and I am new to the forum this is my first post.2 years sober yes it took me 10 years to get well from alcohol.

I have taken all the usual medications and it did help me in the begining but after several years and 3 years of 1 on 1 counseling
I began to get very ill from the meds and decided to stop.It was not easy.

AA meeting were very stressfull for me and it got to the point that I couldnt attend anymore to much fear!!Then I found DRA (dual recovery anonymous) but I dont know if you can attend meeting with your phobia.I can only do 1 a week but I have phone # of people in my group and we talk on a regular basis over the phone.DRA (www.draonline.org (http://www.draonline.org))


Dual Recovery Anonymous™ is an independent, nonprofessional, twelve step, self-help fellowship organization for people with a dual diagnosis. Our goal is to help men and women who experience a dual illness. We are chemically dependent and we are also affected by an emotional or psychiatric illness. Both illnesses affect us in all areas of our lives; physically, psychologically, socially, and spiritually.

My girl freind has ben very supportive of me for most of the time
but I have had times when she was borderline abusive .We live together and I still cant work and I am on ssi disability.
I take care of her 8 year old girl, when I first moved in with her
and the first time child caire I had to do (I dont have children Im 47) I hade a break down.

A spouce has no Excuse being mean to sick person trying to get well.Try to get him to understan this is somthing you did not ask
for in your life.