View Full Version : Step by step and the power of can't.

04-05-2011, 05:49 AM
Step by step and the power of canít.

Whatever you choose to do to improve your life, getting into the habit of doing something regularly, being disciplined, and into a routine seems to be where most people fall down, thatís if they get past the first two steps. I know, from many past and personal experiences of falling down.

Step by step, day by day is essential for achieving anything that you want. Itís important that you know what you want of course, (this is the first step) it doesnít matter if itís a big or a small goal, want or desire, but doing a little bit everyday towards that goal is absolutely key.

Itís a very important part of the process. You have to get into your mind that youíre in it for the time it takes to reach that goal. Make your new, good intentions that will get you there, a habit, (it only takes 2-3 weeks to form a new habit).

Whatever you desire or want for yourself, you will have to do something on a regular basis to achieve it.

Letís take losing weight for example. The only way to lose weight, or becoming slim and healthy, (it feels much better stating what you want, rather than what you want to lose) is to eat a bit less and a little healthier, and do a little more physical exercise, or some exercise, on a regular basis.

Iíve helped many clients who wanted to lose weight, but one of the biggest problems was that they had unconsciously, put firmly in their mind that it was going to be difficult. All of them had there own individual reasons why it would be difficult, why they couldnít do it, which I wonít go into here, but all of them had beliefs about themselves, and about losing weight, that were not actually true.

After breaking down all the Ďlimiting beliefsí (step by step) they had about losing weight and helping them to start seeing themselves as being slim and healthy and helping them to be excited and motivated to get going, it was very easy for them to do what they needed to do, step by step, day by day (and nothing to do with diets).

If someone wants to lose 18 kilos for example, itís important to look ahead into the future, letís say, 6 months, thatís about 3 kilos per month, less than 1 kilo per week. Breaking things down into small bite size pieces is much easier for the mind to digest (full puns intended).

Your mind has to go there first.

You need to believe that itís possible, to make it possible! It wonít happen any other way, and breaking it down into smaller steps or chunks, makes the process so much easier for the mind to take on board. If your task or goal is going to take a year, it can only be done day by day, and if itís well planned, you will get there, maybe sooner than you think, but your mind has to go there first.

My very first client wanted to lose two stones in three months for her wedding day. Every time she thought about it, her mind told her that it would be difficult, (she even had a picture of what two stones looked like, which made it worse and reaffirmed that she couldnít do it). After getting her to see and be ok with, the fact that it was less than 1 kilo per week, another step was completed and she felt much less overwhelmed by the task at hand, and I was able to break down all other Ďlimiting beliefsí.

The power of canít.

Itís all a state of mind, if you think you canít then you wonít.

I ask many clients (not necessary weight loss clients) if they can eat an elephant. The immediate response, by the vast majority, is an overwhelming Ďnoí. They shut out the possibility of being able to do it because the mind says ĎI canítí, straight away, therefore blocking out any possibility that it can be done and stopping the thought process proceeding, creatively, with solutions.

The fact is, of course you can eat an elephant, it may take a while, but if you broke it down into smaller chunks and you had a plateful on a daily basis, eventually the elephant would be eaten. It may take time, a few months for some people, a few years for others, but it would get eaten. You just need to believe it.

The point is, many people stop themselves from doing things because they see the task at hand as being too big or taking too long, and we can talk ourselves out of things so easily. The mind is into the habit of saying ĎI canítí, immediately, and because of this, most people donít even entertain the fact that it can be possible, they stop themselves at the very first step, with many thingís much smaller than eating an elephant.

You may ask yourself, Ďcan I do thisí? (Put in there anything you think you canít do).
For most people, the mind answers with a resounding Ďnoí!
You may ask, Ďwhy canít I do thisí? And your mind will give all the reasons why it canít do it.
Give your mind different questions to answer, questions where it canít answer with a yes or no. You need to trick or work with your mind. e.g.:

ē How can I do this?
ē What is the first step I need to take to achieve this?
ē Who do I know that can help?
ē Where can I find help?
ē Whatís the worst thing about it?
ē Whatís stopping me? (This is a fantastic question, it forces you to Ďgo insideí and challenge yourself, and it forces you to be honest with yourself).
ē If I started today, and did a little everyday, how long will it take to complete?

Asking yourself these types of questions allows you to go to the next step;
These questions donít stop you in your tracks; they force you to move forward.
They will give you answers and allow your mind to find solutions as to how you can do it.

Your mind can be your greatest friend or your worst enemy. Itís never too late for anyone to start learning how their mind works, and to start getting it to work for them, allowing it to help and not hinder them.

Anything that you want from life can only be achieved by taking it step by step, (take a moment now, go back and look at your life, everything youíve ever done happened step by step) and the second step is getting your mind to believe that it is possible. To get to the second step, of course, you must take the first, which is to desire or want something.

After your goal or desire is created and your belief is strong so that you know you can achieve it, another very important step in the process is done.

Itís so difficult to do anything without creating, very strongly in your mind, a clear picture and feeling of being able to achieve it!

Everything that has been achieved, made, invented, created by anyone in history, started with someone having a picture or thought in their mind and a belief that it can be done. Anyone that ever achieved anything, consciously or unconsciously saw themselves, or really felt doing or having that which they desired. When this part in the process is complete, your mind will start to show you the steps required to get there. It canít be done any other way!

Knowing what you want and believing that you can have it, will allow you to see and know the other steps required to enable you to get wherever it is you want to be. Once you believe that you can have what you desire, there will be specific steps that take you to your prize.

Write those steps down, see them in your minds eye, really see and feel yourself achieving whatever it is. Focus on Ďfirst things firstí. Complete the first step, until the end, then, go on to the second, and so on, enjoy the journey, itís taking you somewhere that you want to go, to something that you want or desire.

Itís not impossible, therefore, it is possible!

Craig Thompson PNLP, CHyp, TFTdx


04-05-2011, 06:01 AM
Very Very well written Craigtom, it will be an eye opener for many people who are on this site searching for solutions to break the sufferings of their anxiety cycle which is caused by spiralling negative thought process.

I believe this a the perfect solution to achieve anything and everything in life, starting with conquering the Anxiety Condition,

Thanx a ton for this writeup, great work, :):):)