anxiety then depression cycle

[richy1991]

hey guys

im back, suppose thats not a good thing in a way.

okay so im into the forth month of my "problem"
im not doing too bad, i get through everyday quite well, but im still not recovered yet
i seem to be in an anxiety then depression cycle
what i mean by this is i have anxiety to a point where it clears up but soon as it clears i get hit with what i think is depression and i just get a very strong sad emotional feeling
tbh i prefer the sad feeling to feeling anxious however it really gets to me as i hate feeling sad when i know i should be happy
well eventually, so many days having the sad feeling anxiety will hit me again
then thats the cycle, it will eventually die down and depression comes back and so forth.

i was told if one clears up, the other one will clear up, but honestly thats not happening with me

is there anyway i can break this cycle?

thanks
richy

[gaara]

hey guys

im back, suppose thats not a good thing in a way.

okay so im into the forth month of my "problem"
im not doing too bad, i get through everyday quite well, but im still not recovered yet
i seem to be in an anxiety then depression cycle
what i mean by this is i have anxiety to a point where it clears up but soon as it clears i get hit with what i think is depression and i just get a very strong sad emotional feeling
tbh i prefer the sad feeling to feeling anxious however it really gets to me as i hate feeling sad when i know i should be happy
well eventually, so many days having the sad feeling anxiety will hit me again
then thats the cycle, it will eventually die down and depression comes back and so forth.

i was told if one clears up, the other one will clear up, but honestly thats not happening with me

is there anyway i can break this cycle?

thanks
richy

You seem to be having the same problem as me. I've been thinking about it from the most logical standpoint lately though and I may be wrong(still waiting on seeing a professional) but I'll say it on here and see if anyone agrees with me:

Basically, the anxiety and depression you are describing is caused by some factor in your life that isn't resolved. If depression was a serious disorder for you that isn't caused by a factor(money, relationships, work, school etc) then you would've experienced depression back when you were in the age range of 12-19 basically the puberty years. I think actual serious sufferers of depression literally do have a chemical inbalance and that is why many of them suffer from a young age usually around the puberty range.

Because I(and i'm assuming you) had a pretty normal and happy upbringing, there doesn't seem to be an actual chemical imbalance inside of us but some sort of factor that is causing us to feel this way. I think the act of trying to figure out what that factor is and/or not letting us believe it's something that may change our life is causing the anxiety.

I do belive however, once you find out that factor and take care of it, you will return to being yourself again and it will feel like a massive boulder has been removed from your chest.

At least, this is what I believe...also the fact that this has been on my mind non-stop since the end of july(a few breaks of normality in between but virtually non-stop 24/7 since january) is taking a huge toll on our bodies and mind.

I'm tired all the time, haven't had a "rested" feeling when I wake up despite sleeping and eating regularly. Memory is really bad, I'm a lot less sharp and I can't remember the last time I felt like myself or looked forward to anything. I actually feel like the state I'm in now is how it should be and that everything before this was just some sort of fluke and that it was a "1 time deal" that I can never acheive that sort of happiness again..it basically feels hopeless but at the same time, very very deep down there's still a tiny glow of fire that isn't out yet and i'm hoping with the help of professionals, I can get to the bottom of this problem and never look back.

How are things going with therapy anyway? Have you been going?

[richy1991]

yeah i can really relate to what you just said however i am only 19 so could this just be a late puberty out burst?

iv been told to not look at what caused this cause trying to find that out will stress me more, so i dunno

iv only had 1 therapy lesson so far which in my opinion was a waste of time

[gaara]

yeah i can really relate to what you just said however i am only 19 so could this just be a late puberty out burst?

iv been told to not look at what caused this cause trying to find that out will stress me more, so i dunno

iv only had 1 therapy lesson so far which in my opinion was a waste of time

I don't understand people who say that. For me, 50% of the problem is the cause (which i still don't know) and the other 50% is me trying to find out what the cause is..I can only be 100% fine again if I can fix the first half of the problem. You find the cause, that brings you a HUGE step closer to fixing it. Do you just ignore the check-engine light on your car when it comes on or do you take it in to a mechanic to find out the problem and then go from there and figure out how to fix it?

Why are human emotions any different? Like I said, there had to have been some sort of cause that started all of this that you still haven't addressed yet.

Can I ask why the 1st session was a waste of time? Here's what I was thinking of doing..you know how I typed out that massive 3 page PM to you a while back? I basically outlined from START to PRESENT what happened and what my thought processes were since all this started..maybe you can do the same and present that to your therapist and have he or she read it then get back to you and go from there?

It's hard to sit there and just say all your thoughts/feelings out loud without forgetting some stuff that may make a big difference in the direction of the therapy.

[mamascrazy1985]

i agree on the therapy thing. i have been to 5 or 6 therapy sessions and i have noticed that my anxiety gets worse over the holidays where i tend to get sick because of the weather. usually sinus infections and such which cause me to be unbalance. which then flares my anxiety because its something else besides that infections. maybe the sickness in my head hahaha anyways and after the holidays i go through allergies which keeps me in a fog which is very similar to some anxiety symptoms. anyway my point is after having anxiety for some time you tend to figure out your cycles. my stress is causing mine. for whatever reason things set me over the edge really easy and make me anxious. it all had to do with my childhood experiences and life that has caused these flare outs and thoughts that i have as a young adult. for example i never felt like i was good enough for my parents they were always be littleing me and every boyfriend i have ever had cheated on me. so now in my 6 year relationship i get all panicky if my spouse is late coming home or doesnt answer the phone which causes me to be anxious. and makes me think that he is doing something behind my back which isnt good for my relationship to let it all out but also isnt good for me to keep it bottled in. what i cannot figure out is why does life with anxiety have to be a damn cycle? it gets on my nerves so bad which causes anxiety haha sometimes i think it will never end.
hope you are well
achelle

[jimmy2shoes]

i know how you feel, i went through that for a little while.
I hate that feeling, when the anxiety is gone - and you expect to be happy that it's gone, but your left with a sad feeling. I don't get it, understand it, WISH i could, because it REALLY started to get to me (hence why i started taking meds).
It's not even a deep sadness, it's just a level of sadness (for no apparent reason) that lingers. I think it's definitely related to anxiety - something to do with when your NOT so occupied with dealing with anxiety, it's like your brain gives itself a break and realises how hard all the shits been and hence (depressive) feelings come back... which eventually turns back into anxiety.
I think persistance is key - keep forcing yourself into situations that you used to enjoy, and force yourself to think positively even when you don't feel it. Fake it till you make it.
Even when i started taking anti' d's i was getting that feeling quite often, its only in the last month or so (ive been taking meds for 8 months) that the feeling has subsided. So, the meds didn't fix it, but there were things in my life that needed to be resolved (and have been), like breaking up with gf of 2.5 years, and other things.
While its hard to nail exactly whats wrong, it's important that we look at whats happening in our lives NOW that could cause us to feel this way (apart from the anxiety itself), and maybe also into the past. I know your 19, and thats when mine all started, (im 21 now) and i can tell you im 98% better than i was when this whole thing started. But it takes time, and a shitload of effort, but i feel like quite a strong character now. I can safely say that my 'anxiety' is over, without doubt, with no intrusive thoughts saying 'no it isn't it's here now, your thinking about it now.' heh.
there is hope, especially gaara - u just gotta keep the flame burning. we are young, and nothing lasts forever, including anxiety and depression. As long as we take an active approach to improve, it's virtually impossible to remain static.

Hope this helps