hockeyplayer
03-05-2011, 12:27 PM
Hi first time posting happy to join the community !
I'm a 24 years old male , 5-9 150 lbs living in Canada.
During my teenager years I was smoking marijuana , drinking and smoking cigarettes with the occasionnal mescaline trip here and there.When I was 17 years old I did speed for a year , then stopped.I had my first panic attack at age 18 while smoking marijuana and until 3 monthes ago I sometimes had panic attacks but always while on drugs.
The last 3 years , my drug of choice was cocaine , on and off with period of abuse and period of being sober.3 monthes ago , I had probably the worst panic attack of my life after a normal trip of cocaine , I went ( again ) to the E.R. they tested me for lots of things with electro cardiogram everything seemed to be fine.I have to say I've never had a panic attack while sober , but something changed in me that night.
I developped a couple of rashes the day after ( still have some of them 3 monthes later )and was very anxious , had panic attack pretty much everyday and was feeling unreal ( derealisation ).Now since 3 monthes I'm stuck in a vicious cycle of insane hypocondria and panic disorder ( hypocondria being vastly about my heart and cardiovascular system ).I also took benzos for 1 month but stopped them.My blood pressure was sometimes high and sometimes normal.
I'm currently starting a CBT or a therapy not sure what kind.There's day when I feel better but rarely a day where I don't waste at least one hour with my anxiety.Some days are all about anxiety and symptoms.
Now I could say I'm feeling better than 2 monthes ago but my phobia for my heart is worst than ever.I've always did sport here and there and am in decent shape but just last night I was playing hockey and my heart was racing , my lungs burning and overall everytime I finished a shift I was freaking out on the bench , I thought it was a pretty fast heart rate.Basically I'm scared to do excercise but I want to so much and I know I have to excercise to heal.
any tips or helps ?
A changed man :(
I'm a 24 years old male , 5-9 150 lbs living in Canada.
During my teenager years I was smoking marijuana , drinking and smoking cigarettes with the occasionnal mescaline trip here and there.When I was 17 years old I did speed for a year , then stopped.I had my first panic attack at age 18 while smoking marijuana and until 3 monthes ago I sometimes had panic attacks but always while on drugs.
The last 3 years , my drug of choice was cocaine , on and off with period of abuse and period of being sober.3 monthes ago , I had probably the worst panic attack of my life after a normal trip of cocaine , I went ( again ) to the E.R. they tested me for lots of things with electro cardiogram everything seemed to be fine.I have to say I've never had a panic attack while sober , but something changed in me that night.
I developped a couple of rashes the day after ( still have some of them 3 monthes later )and was very anxious , had panic attack pretty much everyday and was feeling unreal ( derealisation ).Now since 3 monthes I'm stuck in a vicious cycle of insane hypocondria and panic disorder ( hypocondria being vastly about my heart and cardiovascular system ).I also took benzos for 1 month but stopped them.My blood pressure was sometimes high and sometimes normal.
I'm currently starting a CBT or a therapy not sure what kind.There's day when I feel better but rarely a day where I don't waste at least one hour with my anxiety.Some days are all about anxiety and symptoms.
Now I could say I'm feeling better than 2 monthes ago but my phobia for my heart is worst than ever.I've always did sport here and there and am in decent shape but just last night I was playing hockey and my heart was racing , my lungs burning and overall everytime I finished a shift I was freaking out on the bench , I thought it was a pretty fast heart rate.Basically I'm scared to do excercise but I want to so much and I know I have to excercise to heal.
any tips or helps ?
A changed man :(