Hi all

[Miss_K]

Hi everyone,

You might want to think twice about reading this because I feel like once I start writing - I might not be able to stop!

Firstly, I am a 30 year old mother of 4. I have two 8 year olds, a 3 year old and a 5 month old. I am in a relationship with the father of my 2 youngest children.

Now, I need to go back to 2004. To cut a long story short, I was in an abusive,violent relationship.One night my ex-partner actually head butted me. I had a massive squidgy lump in the middle of my forehead. I never went to the hospital or anything,and I never felt ill in any way immediately afterwards. After a few months I started to get a bit paranoid that this might of done me some kind of permanent damage, so I went to visit my G.P.
He told me that if there was any kind of damage, then something would of presented itself by now - ahhh huge relief for me (temporarily).

Now, lets move forward to 2006. I was going through some pretty stressful stuff. I was leaving my abusive ex, and moving with my 2 children. He had met someone else. My head was a mess.
I started getting weird sensations in the right side of my scalp. Like pins and needles. Always in the same spot. I didnt go to my G.P. over it, because it sort of didnt worry me. Thats the first time I remember it happening.

Fast forward to mid August 2010. This is where my problems started. I dont know where to start. I could just cry right now.
Two days before I gave birth to my youngest child I woke up with this pins and needles tingling sensation in my head. It got so bad, and I so convinced myself I was dying that I actually went to the hospital. They seen me straightaway with me being pregnant and at my due date.
A doctor came to see me. She convinced me that the tingling in my head was a 'migraine presenting itself in a different way'.
Now I know for a FACT that it was'nt! Iv had too many migraines in my life, so she could absolutley NOT pass it off as a migraine. She gave me co-drydamol and sent me home. That was that.

Two days later I gave birth to my daughter. Everything was fine with her. She was completley healthy - so was I -according to the doctors.
Then I got worse.
The pins and needles on my scalp stayed with me for the next 7-8 weeks. It moved down into my hand. I seen 7 different doctors, my midwife, my health visitor,a therapist and an optician.
The doctors did them neurological tests on me, y'know the ones where you have to physically do things. There was nothing wrong with me.
I started getting 'floaters' in my eyes. My G.P. sent me to get an eye test. The optician told me that all the tests i'd had done couldnt of came back more perfect.
I was still not convinced.
My health visitor and one of the doctors I had seen told me that the pins and needles in my hand was carpal tunnel syndrome.

After about 7-8 weeks, all these things disapeared. And now 2 months or so on - they are back. I have had them for a week. They are getting worse and I dont know what to do anymore. I am googling symptoms all the time and so far have managed to convince myself that I have a brain tumour, cyst, aneurysm, cancer. I have found out today from google that all my symptoms are the onset symptoms of MS.
I can't cope. I am convinced I am going to die. Nobody will take me seriously.

I have the pins and needles as I write this. It feels like its moved to my jaw and my forehead. I have it in my right hand and foot. Its always the right side,never the left. This is the side that my ex partner head butted me on. I get this wierd cold burning sensation on the right hand side, very top of my head. I only get that occasionally. The pins and needles turn into burning sometimes. Sometimes it feels hot, sometimes cold.Sometimes itchy!

I am so absolutley terrified that there is something 'not right' in my head. My G.P. has told me that there is nothing wrong with me and so have all the other people I have told - both medical professionals AND friends and family. My G.P. said he would send me for a brain scan to put my mind at ease. I said no. I said no because im scared to go for that incase they find something wrong - yes, I know, thats the whole point. Its ridiculous. I am ridiculous.

My head feels like its literally buzzing at the minute. I dont know why these symptoms have came back after 2 months of not having them. I dont feel stressed, and I dont know what could of made it happen again. What I do know is that I dont think I can cope with this for months again.

It really annoyed me that I felt like this after my baby was born. I was so consumed with it all, and obsessed with checking symptoms that I feel I 'missed' her first 2 months. I can't face going through this again and missing more important milestones and events in my childrens lives. Its just not fair.
Why me? Why did this have to happen to me. Im so scared that im going to die. Every part of me keeps twitching, these floaters are getting worse.I even get pins and needles in the right side of my tongue! I feel like im 'not here' sometimes. Everytime I type these things into google this stupid list comes up about a 'brain tumour symptoms survey'.
Yes, I have read it, and yes - I think I have every symptom on the list.

Im sorry for droning on and on but I need to know if anyone has ever felt exactly like this, or am I the only one who feels like I am about to drop dead at any given moment.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. Any input would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

[Miss_K]

Hi Kev,

Firstly, thanks for your reply. Its good to know that I am not alone. After reading your post, I realised that you are absolutely right in saying that none of the health professionals have actually explained to me what could be going on with me OR how to deal with it.

After I wrote my first post on here on Friday night, I went to bed and I couldnt sleep because I am just so consumed by it all. I was lay there, thinking, and then the right side of my face went numb. I went hysterical. I went and sat downstairs for an hour and half on my own. I just sat and cried. At one point I was debating whether to go to hospital. I decided not to eventually beecause I knew they would either send me home or send me for some kind of scan on my head.
I dont want to have a scan on my head incase there is something there, yet that would solve everything for me. I am sick of this vicious circle. No, im not sick of it, I am absolutley terrified of it.

Can I ask you something? In your reply you said that you used to feel the way I do. Did you used to have the pins and needles/tingling/numbness/creeping sensation in your head? If so, was it always in the exact same place on your head? This is what makes me think that it is something sinister - the way that it doesnt move round, it just stays in the exact same place.

Every doctor I have seen, I have asked them 'do you think I have a brain tumour'? Every answer is 'no'. Why can I not get this into my head? Why can I not believe the doctors?
When I try to think rationally about it I realise that they MUST be right. They would of done tests or something on me. Even the optician told me that the majority of people with brain tumours fail on the peripheral vision test. I had one done - it came back perfect. I still refuse to believe it.

Back to your reply, it would be very much appreciated if you would give me some tips. That would be great. My health visitor suggested to me that I go to see someone about having cognitive behavioural therapy. Did you ever try this?

Speak soon :)

[Miss_K]

Hi Kev, thanks for your reply.

Everything you have wrote is so true. After I read the link that you had inboxed me last night, I went to bed and I actually went to sleep about 5 minutes after I got in bed. That was a miracle in itself as it usually takes me ages, and inbetween that i'll start thinking and panicking and crying!

I will have a look at the site you have wrote about here - thanks :)
And about the book 'hope and help for your nerves' - I have it! I bought it a few months ago when I started feeling the way I do.
Oh and I don't really know why you asked if I was left handed? I actually write with my right hand but I do everything else with my left, why?

I think that the whole 'headbutting' episode did kick this off too. I wasnt too concerned about it at first, but I think as I have got older I realised that it might of caused serious damage. I know that if that was the case then surely something would of happened to me by now - unless its biding its time and killing me slowly - thats how I think.
All these sensations in my head started 2 days before I gave birth to my 4th child, so I think you are right when you say it could be hormone related, my Health Visitor said that she thought it could be hormone related too.
Do you think I could of felt temporarily better because it was Christmas and I had a lot to do, and a lot to look forward to? So it kind of took my mind off things? But then, if it had 'took my mind of things' - does that mean im just imagining these sensations in my head. Im pretty sure im not imagining them. Sorry for droning on and answering my own questions.

I wish I was as convinced as you that the scan would come 100% clear. I just cannot see it happening. Why do I have to think the worst? Im so fed up of feeling like this. Its so morbid that I think about death all the time.I feel that when I actually feel like this - everyone around me starts having bad luck.
Its really odd, because I know I must be stressed - but I dont feel like I am.
When I was younger I imagined that people with 'stress' were just always shouting or screaming - not having something like what im experiencing at the moment. I am so terrified of this. Its depressing. I don't want to end up on pills off the doctor either. I think I could do without them in my life!
The sensation in my head is here with me right now. It feels like a draught, like someone blowing on my head. I cant stand it. The more I think about the feeling then the worse it becomes. Then I think it starts moving to my face. Its such a vicious circle.

I think I will go and see someone about having the CBT. I feel that I am a complete worrier by nature. I think this would help me a lot. I would rather go for this than have to be put on some sort of anti-depressant - id be scared to take them, d'ya know why? Because I would be scared of the side effects. Its ridiculous. I feel that I cant win. And I will go ask about the mineral and hormone testing. I have read about that on another site.
Its good to read that you were once like this and you have became well again. It gives me a lot of hope.

Thanks for replying, speak soon.

[mamascrazy1985]

I like your calming effect you have on people. you always seem to know exactly what to say....

[Lil-Han]

I know this is an old thread and I hope you found the cause of your problems already. Everything you have stated sounds identical to what I suffer. Basically due to close pregnancies as well as looking after small children, I have found that I am vit b12 deficient, folate deficient and also vit d deficient. The first two are the cause of my neurological issues just like you described. I had been in and out of hospital for 2 years with what they believed were TIA's (mini strokes), then they were put down simply as migraines and left at that. I was not happy with this. I decided to do my own thorough research and found they could actually indeed be migraines, but aura migraines (wiki it for the best description) and further thorough research I came across the possibility of deficiencies (seeing as I'm forever tired due to running around after 3 children under 5, sometimes even though I feed the children well I forget to take care of my own diet and I often lack the nutrients I'm giving them, as in fruit mainly and I survive on caffiene to get through most days). Anywho I went to the dr's (after also scaring myself about the possibility of ms, the symptoms are identical) and I asked for some blood tests and explained why. The dr wasn't so keen but I pushed this. Well on receiving my results I was indeed deficient. I have been on folic acid and vit b12 for 6 months and although I don't feel totally better I haven't had any of these aura migraines since (until last week but I'd found myself back on the coffees which actually prevent you from absorbing these vital suplememts) - I used to have these migraines at least 2x a week, and at my worst point I had been left with numb hands for over a month even when no other symptoms were present.
Now I'm not expecting this to be an answer but it might be worth asking for your levels to be checked. You'll be glad you did if it is the same. Good luck.
Lol I just joined to write that in the hope I help at least one other person in this god awful battle to find a cause. :)

Hi everyone,

You might want to think twice about reading this because I feel like once I start writing - I might not be able to stop!

Firstly, I am a 30 year old mother of 4. I have two 8 year olds, a 3 year old and a 5 month old. I am in a relationship with the father of my 2 youngest children.

Now, I need to go back to 2004. To cut a long story short, I was in an abusive,violent relationship.One night my ex-partner actually head butted me. I had a massive squidgy lump in the middle of my forehead. I never went to the hospital or anything,and I never felt ill in any way immediately afterwards. After a few months I started to get a bit paranoid that this might of done me some kind of permanent damage, so I went to visit my G.P.
He told me that if there was any kind of damage, then something would of presented itself by now - ahhh huge relief for me (temporarily).

Now, lets move forward to 2006. I was going through some pretty stressful stuff. I was leaving my abusive ex, and moving with my 2 children. He had met someone else. My head was a mess.
I started getting weird sensations in the right side of my scalp. Like pins and needles. Always in the same spot. I didnt go to my G.P. over it, because it sort of didnt worry me. Thats the first time I remember it happening.

Fast forward to mid August 2010. This is where my problems started. I dont know where to start. I could just cry right now.
Two days before I gave birth to my youngest child I woke up with this pins and needles tingling sensation in my head. It got so bad, and I so convinced myself I was dying that I actually went to the hospital. They seen me straightaway with me being pregnant and at my due date.
A doctor came to see me. She convinced me that the tingling in my head was a 'migraine presenting itself in a different way'.
Now I know for a FACT that it was'nt! Iv had too many migraines in my life, so she could absolutley NOT pass it off as a migraine. She gave me co-drydamol and sent me home. That was that.

Two days later I gave birth to my daughter. Everything was fine with her. She was completley healthy - so was I -according to the doctors.
Then I got worse.
The pins and needles on my scalp stayed with me for the next 7-8 weeks. It moved down into my hand. I seen 7 different doctors, my midwife, my health visitor,a therapist and an optician.
The doctors did them neurological tests on me, y'know the ones where you have to physically do things. There was nothing wrong with me.
I started getting 'floaters' in my eyes. My G.P. sent me to get an eye test. The optician told me that all the tests i'd had done couldnt of came back more perfect.
I was still not convinced.
My health visitor and one of the doctors I had seen told me that the pins and needles in my hand was carpal tunnel syndrome.

After about 7-8 weeks, all these things disapeared. And now 2 months or so on - they are back. I have had them for a week. They are getting worse and I dont know what to do anymore. I am googling symptoms all the time and so far have managed to convince myself that I have a brain tumour, cyst, aneurysm, cancer. I have found out today from google that all my symptoms are the onset symptoms of MS.
I can't cope. I am convinced I am going to die. Nobody will take me seriously.

I have the pins and needles as I write this. It feels like its moved to my jaw and my forehead. I have it in my right hand and foot. Its always the right side,never the left. This is the side that my ex partner head butted me on. I get this wierd cold burning sensation on the right hand side, very top of my head. I only get that occasionally. The pins and needles turn into burning sometimes. Sometimes it feels hot, sometimes cold.Sometimes itchy!

I am so absolutley terrified that there is something 'not right' in my head. My G.P. has told me that there is nothing wrong with me and so have all the other people I have told - both medical professionals AND friends and family. My G.P. said he would send me for a brain scan to put my mind at ease. I said no. I said no because im scared to go for that incase they find something wrong - yes, I know, thats the whole point. Its ridiculous. I am ridiculous.

My head feels like its literally buzzing at the minute. I dont know why these symptoms have came back after 2 months of not having them. I dont feel stressed, and I dont know what could of made it happen again. What I do know is that I dont think I can cope with this for months again.

It really annoyed me that I felt like this after my baby was born. I was so consumed with it all, and obsessed with checking symptoms that I feel I 'missed' her first 2 months. I can't face going through this again and missing more important milestones and events in my childrens lives. Its just not fair.
Why me? Why did this have to happen to me. Im so scared that im going to die. Every part of me keeps twitching, these floaters are getting worse.I even get pins and needles in the right side of my tongue! I feel like im 'not here' sometimes. Everytime I type these things into google this stupid list comes up about a 'brain tumour symptoms survey'.
Yes, I have read it, and yes - I think I have every symptom on the list.

Im sorry for droning on and on but I need to know if anyone has ever felt exactly like this, or am I the only one who feels like I am about to drop dead at any given moment.

Thanks for taking the time to read this. Any input would be greatly appreciated. Thanks