Mister_Perkins
07-11-2010, 08:58 PM
Hi All, I would like to introduce myself. I am 22 years old, and I work on a drilling rig. I love my job, and wouldnt trade it for anything. I also like working on my cars on my free time, and working with computers.
I feel very uncomfortable around people, i don't like talking to people and people make me anxious, in fact i cant be myself around people. When i am speaking to someone half of my mind is analyzing their moves, mimics, i wonder what the person is thinking at the moment, thats why i get really distracted in conversations and i never remember names. When i am around other people i try to act as normal as possible so i try to control my every movement, i say things in my head first before saying them out loud. Its very hard for me to look people in the eyes when they are looking at mine.I like observing people when they are not watching, how they react, how they walk, talk etc. and i try to copy these things when i interact and talk to others. i can be completely relaxed and comfortable only when i am alone. When i get into argument with someone i get really frustrated even from small things my heart starts pumping fast and i get an incredibly overwhelming adrenaline rush. I don't remember the last time i cried, and i actually laugh inside when someone else is crying or is sad.
That's who I am, and how I feel. And hopefully this forum will help me be a little happier. Also, I don't believe that speaking to someone about my problems will help me. Psychiatrists are there to hear what your problems are and twist your words around to tell you that there is something wrong with you. I've never taken a prescribed anti-depressant, and wouldn't mind trying one to see how it makes me feel but I dont have medical insurance so I can't even try to get a prescription.
Current living situation:
I owned a house when I was 18 years old, but I was young and stupid and ended up having to sell it. I now live with my parents for now, and recently got laid off because our drilling rig had catastrophic failure. I am collecting unemployment, so I have a lot of free time right now..
I've noticed that a lot of people who see / talk to me always ask me why I'm angry, why I'm sad even though I am either lost in thought, or my face is neutral. I suppose that my face is just naturally in the downward curved position.
I feel very uncomfortable around people, i don't like talking to people and people make me anxious, in fact i cant be myself around people. When i am speaking to someone half of my mind is analyzing their moves, mimics, i wonder what the person is thinking at the moment, thats why i get really distracted in conversations and i never remember names. When i am around other people i try to act as normal as possible so i try to control my every movement, i say things in my head first before saying them out loud. Its very hard for me to look people in the eyes when they are looking at mine.I like observing people when they are not watching, how they react, how they walk, talk etc. and i try to copy these things when i interact and talk to others. i can be completely relaxed and comfortable only when i am alone. When i get into argument with someone i get really frustrated even from small things my heart starts pumping fast and i get an incredibly overwhelming adrenaline rush. I don't remember the last time i cried, and i actually laugh inside when someone else is crying or is sad.
That's who I am, and how I feel. And hopefully this forum will help me be a little happier. Also, I don't believe that speaking to someone about my problems will help me. Psychiatrists are there to hear what your problems are and twist your words around to tell you that there is something wrong with you. I've never taken a prescribed anti-depressant, and wouldn't mind trying one to see how it makes me feel but I dont have medical insurance so I can't even try to get a prescription.
Current living situation:
I owned a house when I was 18 years old, but I was young and stupid and ended up having to sell it. I now live with my parents for now, and recently got laid off because our drilling rig had catastrophic failure. I am collecting unemployment, so I have a lot of free time right now..
I've noticed that a lot of people who see / talk to me always ask me why I'm angry, why I'm sad even though I am either lost in thought, or my face is neutral. I suppose that my face is just naturally in the downward curved position.