When will i know it's ACTUALLY better? recovered ppl, pls re

[lawandorder]

I've been going through some pretty severe anxiety since my first panic attack about a year and a half ago.
My anxiety has gone through SO MANY different phases, from obsessing over things, to fearing im going crazy, fear of developing mood disorder (having depression, fear of getting schizo etc etc yay).
Until about 3 weeks I ago, I was almost convinced I had bi-polar - or something like it (self diagnosed, ofcourse, because my anxiety would be fine for a few days, then i would crash, and it would be really bad for a few days then gradually get better...)
I stayed strong, thought about every angle of my life that could be contributing to the anxiety, family, friends, girlfriend, diet, exercise etc etc, seeing a psychologist doing everything RIGHT because I NEEDED an answer as to whether it was biological or psychological.
After some serious supplemenation (some mega b complex, magnesium, some st johns wort) thing are MUCH better than they used to be, and I havn't crashed like I used to in round 2-3 weeks. Thank god.
HOWEVER - I still have mild spells of derealization, that I just ignore, and i ALWAYS have morning anxiety - mind chatter, and it subsides as the day continues.
I have a question for those who have recovered. HOW and WHEN did you know for SURE that things were indefinetly better? Did you not 'fear' another crash, its inevitable return?
I try to live my life without paying it too much attention but its hard.. because i get HAPPY when its not around - what am I supposed to do, not be joyful that i'm not anxious? Because then when I am feeling wierd I hate it so much more because I compare it to my 'normal' state.
I am MUCH better than I was 6 months to a year ago.. but i am not completely like I used to.. and a part of me thinks I never will be.
Just keep kickin on? Time will heal?
I see a lot of problems on here, and not enough success stories. Sometimes I think once the GATE to anxiety is opened, it can never be completely closed. we just learn to manage it better...
Thankin you

[forwells]

Hi lawandorder :D

I NEEDED an answer as to whether it was biological or psychological. Very hard question to answer and i believe that it just happens to some . mostly because of high stress . But when we are under high stress the way the brain and body works change so it becomes a bit of both .

But to be honest with you and this is from someone that has 99% recovered from huge anxiety . It comes mostly down to the way we think and react to our anxiety .

You can recover from anxiety fully but you need to let it go and it takes time , How long ? What ever it takes ? Stop trying to rush it and stop worrying about it not going away. This worry is infacted keeping it feed .

Live your life the best you can dont struggle but do sit on your butt and expect it to just go away .If you are having a bad day except it as that and just think tommorow will be a better day . Keep doing what you are doing and slowly it will start to fade . I would say that it took me a good 12 months to get past the worst . Even today the memory of what i went though is still fresh some days and when i am really stress it can play up but overall i would live my life the same way i did before my anxiety hit . Even today when i have a bad day i have to reminded myself it is just a bad day just like everyone has at some time .

I see a lot of problems on here, and not enough success stories. Sometimes I think once the GATE to anxiety is opened, it can never be completely closed. we just learn to manage it better...
First off this is a forum so you will hear mostly stories of people in the worst of their anxiety . Secondly every day no matter what tell yourself this . I have anxiety . 1 in 5 people get anixety . most of those people recovery . There has been millions before me that recovered and i will join them one day . Stop telling yourself that you are stuck with it and just keep working as you are and give it time
cheers and good luck kev :D

[vanphelan]

First let me say this. My anxiety all started while recovering from surgery after having a spontaneus lung collapse so most of my problems were health related with anxiety. I know exactly how you feel and I was there. I would say I am somewhere between 95 and 99 percent "recovered." I live my life just like I did before except sometimes I have to remind myself that my body is health and that my benign PVC's (heart beat skips) and exactly that BENIGN. So says the doc anyway lol. The point is that anxiety is a natural reaction to certain things and there is a reason to feel it from time to time. So to say that you can close the door on anxiety is wrong. If someone puts a gun to your head, you are going to be scared. Obviously the problem we have is that we feel like that with no gun (or anything for that matter) threatening us. Just now when I got to work I was feeling a little bit anxious because I thought about it for a moment or two (haven't in weeks even thought about whether I felt good or not.) It does take some time but you can recover. Also Seeing a lot of problems and not a lot of recovery stories on a forum like this is because those who recover don't tend to post on anxiety forums lol. Well at least except for those of us who would like to help and give back to a place that helped us a little bit.