Razz
04-28-2010, 05:37 AM
My story in brief. I have had an anxiety disorder since the age of 19, many years ago before they knew what it was. I was hospitalized and given shock therapy and I was worse on getting out.
I was house bound for two years but started doing my own desensitization work and eventually recovered and earned a PhD with 9 years of college.
I always struggled with a sensitive nervous system and life was difficult...but also had wonderful times. Had I known more about living with a sensitive nervous system it would have been better.
Fast forward: in 1989 I had loads of stress come at me...LOADS. My anxiety went out of control so I gave up never wanting to take drugs and started Xanax. It made me sick almost immediately but I kept trying finally got off after two years.
I went into three years of a horrid withdrawal, could not work and spent most of my days pacing and crying...but recovered. I have tried every class of anxiety drugs and my body can not take them so I am stuck doing this naturally.
After many years of being pretty OK in 2007 huge stresses hit again and I had a major health scare ( does not take much as health fears are a main trigger). Not only did I go into a major anxiety breakdown but ALL the benzo withdrawal symptoms came back...after so many years.
It has been 40 months and I am not any better, in total torture, can not work and am going crazy. Were it not for a wonderful wife I doubt I would be alive.
I have spent years reading books on anxiety, 7 years with 4 different therapists. Before this breakdown we took excellent care of ourselves, do not smoke or drink, worked out or exercised every day, meditated daily an eat organically.
I am terrified and seem to be getting worse, all I do is walk, pace or lay in bed digging my fingernails into the covers. I don't see anyone else this sick and especially this long.
I have worked so hard on my condition and now I am sicker than ever...I need help and there is no medication and I have no one that understands or anyone to talk to like me.
James
I was house bound for two years but started doing my own desensitization work and eventually recovered and earned a PhD with 9 years of college.
I always struggled with a sensitive nervous system and life was difficult...but also had wonderful times. Had I known more about living with a sensitive nervous system it would have been better.
Fast forward: in 1989 I had loads of stress come at me...LOADS. My anxiety went out of control so I gave up never wanting to take drugs and started Xanax. It made me sick almost immediately but I kept trying finally got off after two years.
I went into three years of a horrid withdrawal, could not work and spent most of my days pacing and crying...but recovered. I have tried every class of anxiety drugs and my body can not take them so I am stuck doing this naturally.
After many years of being pretty OK in 2007 huge stresses hit again and I had a major health scare ( does not take much as health fears are a main trigger). Not only did I go into a major anxiety breakdown but ALL the benzo withdrawal symptoms came back...after so many years.
It has been 40 months and I am not any better, in total torture, can not work and am going crazy. Were it not for a wonderful wife I doubt I would be alive.
I have spent years reading books on anxiety, 7 years with 4 different therapists. Before this breakdown we took excellent care of ourselves, do not smoke or drink, worked out or exercised every day, meditated daily an eat organically.
I am terrified and seem to be getting worse, all I do is walk, pace or lay in bed digging my fingernails into the covers. I don't see anyone else this sick and especially this long.
I have worked so hard on my condition and now I am sicker than ever...I need help and there is no medication and I have no one that understands or anyone to talk to like me.
James