Explaining Panic Attacks to people who don't have them

[shoe]

Panic attacks are tough things to try and relate to someone that has never experienced them. Where they might see someone who is being 'ridiculous' or acting 'weird' or 'erratic', or perhaps being a 'wuss' or 'freak' when having a panic attack, they fail to see that this is a true debilitating disorder, one that is very difficult to control and needs a lot of hard work and effort to overcome.

I wish I could say I knew the secret to getting someone else to understand what it's like to suffer from an anxiety disorder, but its almost impossible for them to fully comprehend it without actually living a day in our skin.

Nonetheless, I have pondered what I would say when trying to explain this disorder to someone, and below is what I have come up with, at least as far as panic attacks go. I'm not telling other people to use this, I'm simply sharing what I think might help in explaining the disorder at least for me. The real purpose of this thread though is for everyone to jump in and share what they think works (or might work) when talking about panic and anxiety to others who don't have these disorders.

Anyway, here's what I (think) I would say if I could get the words out:

I have a faulty sympathetic nervous system (SNS) response to anxiety-producing stimuli. Whereas a typical person may go into a normal heightened state of 'arousal' when something gets them nervous, an anxiety-disorder sufferer's body misinterprets things and jumps into 'panic' mode where it should normally produce general feelings of nervousness. The body sends signals to the brain that it is in a life-threatening situation when it truely isn't, and thus the mind tends to react by trying to mobilize the body to escape that situation. Also, it is very difficult for a person to think or behave rationally while in this panic-state, as the mind is focused on escaping whatever is causing those feelings. In addition, the feeling of panic itself too, or sensations that are similar to panic, can actually make the body even more panicked.

Anyway, after a few times experiencing this, the body becomes conditioned to respond that way given the same stimuli. In other words, just as Pavlov's dogs would unknowingly drool when he rang the bell (indicating 'time to eat') in his experiments, my body too produces an 'automatic' conditioned response to the given stimulus. And thus the vicious cycle continues.

..and there ya have it! hehe. let me know what u think - and share your own ideas of what to say ;) thanks,
dan

P.S. What I described isnt' exactly factual, but it does give a general idea to people of how things escalate to an extreme where they shouldn't.

P.S. The sympathetic nervous system (SNS) is a division of the autonomic nervous system, basically the 'automatic' nervous system that maintains states of the body and keeps the blood pumping and air flowing. The SNS comes into play in the 'fight or flight' reaction and puts the body in a heightened state of arousal while the parasympathetic nervous system (PNS) returns it to its normal state. And if you don't know about Pavlov's experiments, you can read up on it here at http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Classical_conditioning. :)

[klb]

and when you try to explain it to some..they look at you like HUH??? :lol: :wink:

[shoe]

hehe, well the sympathetic nervous system stuff might throw them, so I would need to explain that, but the rest I thought would be able to be related somehow to them. I think knowing more about the way your body works then the people you are explaining it to might make them more receptive to listening to or accepting what you have to say. But, thats just my opinion.

Anyway, like I said, I'd love to hear what other people would say to explain their condition, I'm not the official spokesperson after all ;)

[aclockworkrystn]

I usually say a panic attack feels like I've overdosed on caffeine and cough syrup at the same time, hah. Depends who I'm talking to. I find it extremely difficult to explain how a panic attack feels to someone whose never had one.

[jessed03]

Love the really old threads. :)

[Chiliphil1]

Love the really old threads. :)

10 years! That's gotta be a record!

I generally just tell people to imagine the scariest thing they have ever been through and then tell them to imagine that feeling being in your head and not being able to get away from it!

[Nec]

Wow this thread is quite old. I explained it to my friend that it's like feeling that something horrible is going to happen, I just described to him all feelings I went through when I had my first panic attack. I think the first one is usually the scariest because then you don't know what is happening to you, I might be wrong but it really felt awful.

[frs31]

I understand totally what you posted. It is so hard to explain things when it's more of a feeling. I've tried and tried to tell people but I feel like they think I'm crazy or something. I've tried different types of medications, but the fact of taking meds puts me into an anxious state. I start thinking "what is this medicine going to do to me, how will I feel, what if it changes me." And yes, people who don't understand will never unless they feel what it does to you. I'm currently off of medicine and weening myself off caffeine and exercising more to try and help. Great post by the way.

[gypsylee]

I generally just tell people to imagine the scariest thing they have ever been through and then tell them to imagine that feeling being in your head and not being able to get away from it!

That's pretty much the best description I reckon. Tell them to think of how they feel before a big job interview or a first date, multiply that by about ten, and have it happen out of the blue for no good reason.

:)

[Dahila]

10 years! That's gotta be a record!

I generally just tell people to imagine the scariest thing they have ever been through and then tell them to imagine that feeling being in your head and not being able to get away from it!


oh shoot I had no idea that panic attacks were so old. Calm people down nothing to explain, others must go through it to understand..........

[gypsylee]

oh shoot I had no idea that panic attacks were so old. Calm people down nothing to explain, others must go through it to understand..........

I was having panic attacks in the 80s.. I was always ahead of my time ;)

[Dahila]

Damn we need like button :)))

[willheal]

No one will understand anxiety even if they have the one-off panic attack (nothing worse than someone who has just 1 of them and thinks they know everything.)

I have tried so many times to explain this to people, and they never took me serious. Even doctors, specialists, some psych doctors. Really! They don't even seem interested, not even in a scholarly way.

I've explained to a doctor this way:
Someone came up and stabbed me, and I'm about to die. A doctor finds me and says there's nothing they can do and I'm told I have 5 minutes left. Imagine every single thought going through my mind for the next 5 minutes. But imagine that every hour, every day of my life.

But it doesn't stop there. Imagine you have this condition that won't ever kill you, but makes you feel physically ill, mentally incapacitated, and worry about everything. Imagine you can never feel truly restful or relaxed, and the single moment of the day that you do relax, your heart begins to race and you jump so violently you scare everyone around you in a public mall. You start to cry in front of people you've never seen before. Imagine this happens so frequently you begin to fear that it will happen again and again. You become so distraught you stop leaving your house.

Look back on your life and remember the joy you had as a carefree kid who was able to run and play. You are now stripped of that. You do not have the privilege to enjoy anything anymore. You have fear and suffering and a haze that covers everything you perceive. And no one will EVER understand this or be able to relate to you--not even the people you love most. Others will treat you like you're crazy and just need to take a pill or screw off to the nuthouse.

Every single muscle in your neck, jaw and back are twisted and tense from stress. You can't focus, both from the chemical effects of the anxiety and the rumination about your own condition. You're still expected to do the same things that regular people are supposed to do. Good luck.

Edit: I know this was an old resurrected thread but I was still inspired to add my 2 cents

Also, I explained some of the dry medical stuff about anxiety, but with a story. You can probably pick apart each piece and tell what symptoms of anxiety I was referring to. It's easier for another person to get a picture in their head and go "ohhhh...crap". I mean, at least to the point where they know you're not doing it for attention or are just too "stressed out". And it's tempting to just throw out medical terms to make it seem more legitimate but if you tell them "I'm suffering" instead of "I am dysphoric" there is a bigger impact.

[Chiliphil1]

I have tried so many times to explain this to people, and they never took me serious. Even doctors, specialists, some psych doctors. Really! They don't even seem interested, not even in a scholarly way.



This is the most frustrating thing about it too. I can't count the times I sat in front of a doctor or PA or whatever and told them exactly what was going on with me, why, when, how, and what to do to fix it only to be looked at like an idiot. Then try telling them that the meds they gave you are not working! Then they really treat you like a dummy.

I was happy last week when I went to my orthopedic surgeon and told him that stopping the pain meds was making me anxious and he actually said "well, you know yourself much better than any of us, so whatever you think will work to get you past it is what you need to do" I have never been told that before, only that they knew what's best and I should listen to them.. I hate to tell you doc but even though you may have been to school for this if you haven't been through it you cannot possibly tell me what I need to do and how to do it, I don't care what your text books say we are not all the same.

[Chiliphil1]

oh shoot I had no idea that panic attacks were so old. Calm people down nothing to explain, others must go through it to understand..........


As far as the 10 years part I was referring to the age of the thread but yes, panic attacks have been around for a long long time, they just didn't always call them that.

[Jon Ander Clooney]

For me is like playing a horror videogame you are truely scared and you cant move or close your eyes.

[jon mike]

to be buried alive daily

[Nec]

For me is like playing a horror videogame you are truely scared and you cant move or close your eyes.

I can relate to this explanation. During my first panic attack I was literally frozen not being able to move at all and it was terrifying.

[Im-Suffering]

The only person accountable to you, is you. The only person you are accountable to, is you. When enough time is spent banging on closed doors you will all eventually turn into self, and heal. No one is left behind in that regard - its impossible to get 'permanently' lost, everyone 'gets there', in time.

In general terms, you get what you expect. So if you expect indifference, confusion, lack of empathy, then that is what you meet. No exceptions in this. Anxiety the result of a confused mind. Stress from (conflicting, non-constructive) expectations, and an overt fear of the world. (apparent to you).

[Dahila]

As far as the 10 years part I was referring to the age of the thread but yes, panic attacks have been around for a long long time, they just didn't always call them that.
I had my first in my early teenagers years and I got something similar to ativan for it. It was at least 50 years ago:)))
I was sarcastic:)) forgive me guys please :)

[gypsylee]

I had my first in my early teenagers years and I got something similar to ativan for it. It was at least 50 years ago:)))
I was sarcastic:)) forgive me guys please :)

Wow you were even more ahead of the times than me! ;)

[Dahila]

Gypsy hehe I am very ahead of my time, this is why no one understand me:)))) I am dealing with it from as early as first stay in hospital which caused real separation issues. I just wonder what children, disabled children feel when they are left in long care facility..................
BTW it never ends. People like us are very often alone, others just do not get it.
I think my whole life was fighting with some shitty stuff, like addiction to ciggies, having asthma:( , adicted to benzo , I was stuffed with. The chasing benzo with the beer and excetera......... struggling all the time
Gypsy as soon as I see you posting, I get a huge smile on my face, thank you my Gypsy:)

[glimmer2525]

I've been yelled at during a panic attack because of someone not truly understanding such a thing. Thinking that I was being overly dramatic by my own choice or something. Its caused quite a wedge between my father and myself. He thinks its something I can just snap out of and now I have resentment towards him for that. I'm usually quick to forgive but it hurt me so badly to think that my own parent won't take the time to research it and understand it for what it is. I can try to explain, but what's the use if they won't listen? And why should I take it upon my already troubled mind and stressed body to break it down for someone who is clearly set in their own thinking? Panic has affected my life more than anything I've ever encountered, it turned my life entirely upside down. and if someone doesn't want to understand what that means for me, then I'd rather just keep my distance.

[PanicCured]

It is because they can see what a joke the whole thing is. It seems very real to you, but to someone not in the panic mode, it looks like a joke. You may also want to see it as a joke. It's a bluff. Don't fall for it.

[glimmer2525]

It is because they can see what a joke the whole thing is. It seems very real to you, but to someone not in the panic mode, it looks like a joke. You may also want to see it as a joke. It's a bluff. Don't fall for it.

I want to be able to do that. Any tips? lol

Funny story... A group of kids were doing a car wash as a fundraiser for their Church to take a trip to an amusement park. Driving around in my car, I told my boyfriend to drive us over to the kids to get my car washed and donate a few dollars. While sitting in the car, all at once there were kids of all ages with water and sponges surrounding us, each washing a different part of the car. All of a sudden I felt extremely claustrophobic and I looked at my boyfriend and told him "Oh shit, maybe this wasn't a good idea.." He kinda chuckled and was like "are you serious?! It's just a bunch of kids!".. I started sweating and felt ridiculous. Not knowing what else to do, I looked over at him very seriously and told him "I need you to tell me to quit being a pus*y."

And so he told me just that, and we both had a laugh, and I got a shitty car wash, but at least we donated to a good cause.

The next day he told me to quit being such a pus*y over something else, thinking it would have the same effect, and I got a little offended lol. Whatever it was in that moment was bothering me more than the car wash, apparently.

I guess what I'm saying is, at different levels of panic, I can maybe make a little joke of it. But if it gets too far gone and someone makes a seriously rude remark, it hurts :(

[PanicCured]

I want to be able to do that. Any tips? lol

Funny story... A group of kids were doing a car wash as a fundraiser for their Church to take a trip to an amusement park. Driving around in my car, I told my boyfriend to drive us over to the kids to get my car washed and donate a few dollars. While sitting in the car, all at once there were kids of all ages with water and sponges surrounding us, each washing a different part of the car. All of a sudden I felt extremely claustrophobic and I looked at my boyfriend and told him "Oh shit, maybe this wasn't a good idea.." He kinda chuckled and was like "are you serious?! It's just a bunch of kids!".. I started sweating and felt ridiculous. Not knowing what else to do, I looked over at him very seriously and told him "I need you to tell me to quit being a pus*y."

And so he told me just that, and we both had a laugh, and I got a shitty car wash, but at least we donated to a good cause.

The next day he told me to quit being such a pus*y over something else, thinking it would have the same effect, and I got a little offended lol. Whatever it was in that moment was bothering me more than the car wash, apparently.

I guess what I'm saying is, at different levels of panic, I can maybe make a little joke of it. But if it gets too far gone and someone makes a seriously rude remark, it hurts :(

Right now the only thing that matters is your anxiety disorder gets better. Everything else needs to take a back seat. You've been doing my Quick Guide right? See a panic attack for what it is, adrenaline gone berserk. Woopdeedoo. Claire Weekes said one of the most all time greatest anxiety helpers ever: "Don't add 2nd fear!" Fully embrace that message of her's. You have to work with anxiety a bit to get it. That is why it upsets me when I see people seeking the safe place or safe person or only asking how to feel better now, instead of how to overcome anxiety through the long term process. You have to have the anxiety come on and navigate your way through it to really master it. You will also learn how when the first feelings come on, to have it dissipate before the full panic sets in. That is what my Quick Guide is about.

[gypsylee]

Gypsy hehe I am very ahead of my time, this is why no one understand me:)))) I am dealing with it from as early as first stay in hospital which caused real separation issues. I just wonder what children, disabled children feel when they are left in long care facility..................
BTW it never ends. People like us are very often alone, others just do not get it.
I think my whole life was fighting with some shitty stuff, like addiction to ciggies, having asthma:( , adicted to benzo , I was stuffed with. The chasing benzo with the beer and excetera......... struggling all the time
Gypsy as soon as I see you posting, I get a huge smile on my face, thank you my Gypsy:)

Aww thanks Dahila :D I have a warm fuzzy feeling now!