New here, extreme driving fears

[JennD]

Hello, my name is Jennifer, and I just discovered this forum. I am 28 years old and never have had a driver's license. When I was 16 I had a learner's permit and wrecked my first time out. I didn't get behind the wheel again until I was 21, where I was in what could have been a fatal crash. Shortly after I moved to another state to live with some family, who told me if I did not get my driver's license I would be kicked out of their home. I took private lessons, but was never able to complete a day. When I am behind the wheel of a vehicle, ANY vehicle, I loose control of all my thoughts and actions. I get hot, sweaty, dizzy, naucous and have even blacked out (that was the time of the near fatal accident, I ended up spinning on the wrong side of the freeway, it was amazing we all walked away). I simply CANNOT drive, I am afraid if I ever try again I will kill myself, or someone else. Given the fact I blacked out the last time from the sheer fear of it all, I don't think that worry is too far fetched. My husband is loving and understanding, but still thinks I just need to "learn" to drive. He says we cannot have children until I get over this, so this is my first step. I don't know what to do, we cannot afford to go to dr.'s to figure this out, and I feel that since this is something mental I should be able to "positive think" myself out of it. But I don't know how to start, I feel so lost. I don't work, go places I want to go, anything because of this. :'(

[1970]

Hi Jenn

It does sound very ristricting the anxiety you have

How are things for you when you are a passenger in a vehicle

I know this might sound a bit silly, but have you tried playing a video game where you are driving or one of those driver simulators, just wondering if you feel that way as well then

Im not sure where you are from but don't you have any doctors or somebody you can talk to that dont charge anything, like a community health centre or somewhere

I get very similar symptoms to you and have blacked out once years ago from it but i was under a large amount of other stress at the time as well, and ever since then i get similar feelings when i drive or know i have to drive, but i just get in there and do it, sometimes theres never a symptom other times its sheer hell but i get through

Trying to talk yourself out of it is right, but i find talking myself out of it also reminds me of it and makes it worse at times

Its a horrible thing, but for me if i give up on driving i will feel that it has finally beaten me and i wont let that happen, thats what keeps me going

I think being told you had to get your drivers licence or be kicked out is a rather selfish thing for someone to say to you and im sure it didnt help the way you feel

I wish you the best of luck with it