pianoman55
12-20-2009, 03:53 PM
Hello everyone!
It's nice to see such a supportive and welcoming group of individuals all battling anxiety (and its brother & sister symptoms and diseases). I hope everyone is doing ok. I have had anxiety since I was a sophomore in highschool (about 15 or 16 years old). My fear started with being afraid of vomiting in public places. So, naturally, like all of us here I became consumed with that fear. The fear took me on quite a rollercoaster. I found myself eating practically nothing (maybe one meal a day) and surviving off of lots of coffee, little sleep, bad food and television. I rarely left the house. In that time period I lost a ridiculous amount of weight. Ironically, that summer, I got horribly ill with some sort of terrible stomach bug. After this, my anxiety went into remission. I chunked up a little bit.. because I started eating again ;-).
Anyways, I feel like I'm slipping a bit back into the bad anxiety place. This semester has been particularly bad, anxiety wise. I'm a sophomore in college now. I'm a musician, and musically I've had a fantastic semester! Academically, it's not been so hot. For some reason, my anxiety has really shot back at me. I've had panic attacks increasingly since last year. Then I had one HUGE one this semester where I was so afraid I was going to throw-up, I literally felt myself gag and I ran to the bathroom. Two hours later I emerged at the end of a horrible panic attack. At that point I decided I needed to get the anxiety in control. I started trying to counter the attacks. My anxiety of vomiting definitely receded. It's much better than it was. Now though, my body has found new things to get anxious about. Now it's about silly irrational fears that I know could never happen. Things like going insane...etc. I've become so afraid of this fear that my mind is even afraid to try any remedies or things to help the fear, because I'm afraid I'll continue be anxious about more things. Basically....I'm afraid of everything. Haha I don't understand it!
This vicious cycle has really been getting to me. It feels really great to let out all this anxiety here though. It puts me back into perspective a little bit. I need to figure out how to get out of the habit of being anxious. Any thoughts?
Best to all! I hope everyone is doing well!
Sincerely,
Jonathan
It's nice to see such a supportive and welcoming group of individuals all battling anxiety (and its brother & sister symptoms and diseases). I hope everyone is doing ok. I have had anxiety since I was a sophomore in highschool (about 15 or 16 years old). My fear started with being afraid of vomiting in public places. So, naturally, like all of us here I became consumed with that fear. The fear took me on quite a rollercoaster. I found myself eating practically nothing (maybe one meal a day) and surviving off of lots of coffee, little sleep, bad food and television. I rarely left the house. In that time period I lost a ridiculous amount of weight. Ironically, that summer, I got horribly ill with some sort of terrible stomach bug. After this, my anxiety went into remission. I chunked up a little bit.. because I started eating again ;-).
Anyways, I feel like I'm slipping a bit back into the bad anxiety place. This semester has been particularly bad, anxiety wise. I'm a sophomore in college now. I'm a musician, and musically I've had a fantastic semester! Academically, it's not been so hot. For some reason, my anxiety has really shot back at me. I've had panic attacks increasingly since last year. Then I had one HUGE one this semester where I was so afraid I was going to throw-up, I literally felt myself gag and I ran to the bathroom. Two hours later I emerged at the end of a horrible panic attack. At that point I decided I needed to get the anxiety in control. I started trying to counter the attacks. My anxiety of vomiting definitely receded. It's much better than it was. Now though, my body has found new things to get anxious about. Now it's about silly irrational fears that I know could never happen. Things like going insane...etc. I've become so afraid of this fear that my mind is even afraid to try any remedies or things to help the fear, because I'm afraid I'll continue be anxious about more things. Basically....I'm afraid of everything. Haha I don't understand it!
This vicious cycle has really been getting to me. It feels really great to let out all this anxiety here though. It puts me back into perspective a little bit. I need to figure out how to get out of the habit of being anxious. Any thoughts?
Best to all! I hope everyone is doing well!
Sincerely,
Jonathan