up and down - will this anxiety ever go away?

[amyjones]

Hi,
I've had a generalised anxiety and panic disorder for a long time and have been on various meds waiting for CBT and to see my pysciatrist.

I went on to citalopram about 3 weeks now as well at betablockers which ive been on for some time.

ive been doing quite well and have started to feel a bit less anxious,. until today, i have woken up really anxious, for reasons i dont know why, ive got that horrible feeling of a knot in my stomach and feel really scared of i dont know what.

I really thought i was making headway with this, and now i feel back to square one.

have others had it where they start to feel ok then all of a sudden those familer feelings start to return? im starting to get really scared that this is never going to go away. its effecitng my performance at work now so much im really scared im going to lose my job.........

[Robbed]

When it comes to anxiety disorder, ups and downs are the nature of the beast. This is VERY typical for recovery from anxiety disorder as well. You can be making LOTS of improvements for months at a time, and then feel as if you have plunged back into the pits of anxiety disorder. But the fact is that, even when you suffer such a setback, you are still better off than before. Oftentimes, this setback feels MUCH worse than it is because you are used to feeling SO much better for a long time. The key thing to remember about setbacks is that they don't last forever. They might last several days or several weeks. But they will end. And when they do, you will start to make progress toward recovery once again. So remember this. Also, remember that setbacks are a normal part of recovery. So they are nothing to despair at. By not giving to setbacks, you keep your recovery on track rather than falling back into the worst of anxiety disorder.

[amyjones]

thanks for your post - it helps that its not jsut me and that i need ot see this as a bit of a set back and not a total breakdown in my recovery, I just hope it doesnt last too long

[RammerJammer21]

amy,

It takes a long time for your mind to forget that you have anxiety. If you are on medication, you are reminded of it every day. A setback is just your sensitized nerves rattling their sabers a little bit. It could be any number of things that trigger this...including something in your sleep that you don't even remember.

Like Robbed said, the main thing to understand is that it's temporary...so don't give it more importance than it deserves.

[ImHereForYou]

Hi Amy,

I completely agree with Rammer and Robbed in this situation.

If you picture a successful stocks graph or any graph for that matter in shares you can see that there are heaps of highs and lows, but the important thing is that the highs get higher and the lows don't get so low. Eventually you see the graph consistently becomes more and more successful.

This is exactly how it is with health. Two steps forward, one step back. It is never linear. Keep working on it and you will bounce back in no time.

Keep us in the loop.

[amyjones]

hi - thanks all for your replies - v helpful. just ot let you know feeling better this week, think meds are kicking in more and am sleeping a bit better - fingers crossed not too many more 'dips'!

[coops025]

The ups and downs are normally linked to your diet or sleep patterns i found. You can have a bad dream and put your body through stress when asleep which can make things worse.

You can win but it takes time and persistance.

[ImHereForYou]

Great to here Amy.

It does take a while for the body to settle into taking meds.

It definitely helps sleeping better.

Just make sure that you don't solely rely on the meds. What I mean by that is getting out there and implementing things into your life that will help you overcome your anxiety and your dips eg. exercise, eating well, meditation, stretching, speaking to people you trust etc.

You want to be able to come off the meds eventually (in accordance with your doctor) so implementing these things will really help you in the long run. It is these small changes that make all the difference.

Good luck!

[dimspace]

ive been like this for the last two days...

ive had anxiety since february, the first two months where awful, i wasnt sleeping, i was panicking about everything, but all the while the doctors where telling me its just stress, you just need rest etc and it will go away.. i was being signed off by the doctor a week at a time, so i was caught in an endless cycle of signed off, relax, panic about the next apointment and so on and so on..

saw some improvement over july and august, but still daily anxiety of the level that prevented me from doing things, but towards the end of august i had a run of 9 days where i didnt have any controlling anxiety, i was anxious, but nothing that prevented me doing things.. in september i had a run of 11 days, october i managed 14 days with only 1 bad day..

and the good thing is, whereas one really bad day was taking a week to recover from, now two or three bad days is only taking me a day or so to get over.. im getting there...

but to the point, the last two days have been awful, anxiety back full time, the metalic taste in the mouth is back, heart rushes, sudden temperature, and in my head it feels as bad as it did all those months ago when i was really really bad..

but you know, if i sit back and think about it, i havnt passed out like i did a month ago, my heart rate was only 102, not 120 like 6 weeks ago, my BP hit 135/73 but dropped pretty quickly back to about 110/70, so although it felt really bad, and felt like the old really high levels, it actually wasnt.. it just feels worse because ive been feeling much more normal recently...

as somebody said, setbacks are going to happen, but i think its worth looking at the setbacks... todays bad day, well i would have given anything to have a day like this six months ago, it would have been a relief...