Desperate for someone to understand

[lindsayarmstrong1]

Hi, My name is lindsay and I am a 21 year old university student. I have been diagnosed with GAD by my doctor. I took 75 mg of Effexor for about two years and got off of it about a year ago. When i got off of it i was fine and ready to take on the world again but recently i find my anxiety is getting back to the level it was at when i started the pills. I worry about everything way too much. If i get a pain in my chest, i think im going to have a heart attack, if i get a canker sore, its obviously mouth cancer to me. I am fortunate that i have the rationality to let these thoughts go and not act on them (although sometimes it takes a couple of hours). Lately i am finding myself not being able to sleep till the middle of the night. When i wake up i am peaceful for about one second then i remember that i have anxiety and it starts all over again. This has been going on really badly for three days/nights now. The thing is, i am not sure what braught it on (if anything). I am a 4th year student of sociology/labour studies so i am constantly learning depressing things about the world and what people are going through on a daily basis, not to mention the economic crisis. Is it rediculous that i get so worked up about that? I think about people in the phillipines who work 80 hours a week for their families and still dont have enough money to have a decent home or food, and it makes me want to cry. I have not really been thinking about any of these things outside of school, but i think it sticks with me and i do not realize it. I got such a bad bout of anxiety yesterday that i had to pull over in my car and just cry for a good half hour. I have so much ambition and drive to have a successful career and family life one day soon and i am fearful that my anxiety might hinder my future. I have had such intense physical symptoms the last couple of days, but today is the worst. I feel like im going to fall over every time i stand up, i have nausea, diahreah, racing heartbeat, sweating, nervouseness and i could cry on the drop of a dime. I just quit smoking about three weeks ago. Could this have something to do with my sudden massive physical symptoms? All of my friends and my boyfriend love me and care about me but they just say "lin, why bother worrying" or "just dont think about it". If it were only that easy.

Can anyone relate? I feel so alone
_________________
Lindsay

[nikolsaid]

I completely understand where you are coming from Lin. I'm 22, also a sociology major, the only difference in our stories is that I took Celexa. I can't say that my Anxiety is based on school, but I took a break from school and was completely asymptomatic. As soon as I started school again my anxiety came back full force. Luckily, I recognize it for what it is so I'm not AS EMOTIONALLY torn as I was the first time around. I don't have palpitations either, but my feet and hands are ALWAYS clammy. But I do think what really tops of my anxiety is negative energy transference. If I were to google a some sort of beating caught on tape or if someone is being really negative, those bad vibes really get to me and I become extra anxious. And when there's good positive vibes I'm okay 98% of the time. School for some reason is my number one trigger, I've yet to truly figure out why. But I totally understand where you are coming from. Not smoking anymore could also be a trigger for you. It depends on how long you smoked before you decided to stop I guess. If you're trying to combat this without the use of meds, working out (cardio) before 6 pm is good according to my therapist. That way, you get all the anxiety out, and by the time you lay down for bed, you don't have the feel good endorphines pumping all through you keeping you up at night. You can also try changing your diet (caffeine, junk food, etc) and see if anything changes as well. I have favorited a page on the net that shows/explains ALL anxiety symptoms, and whenever I start to feel some sort or way, if its on that list, I can tell myself, "this is normal" and calm down MUCH faster. What I did also, was created a blogspot, and the MOMENT you feel anxious if you can... write it out. Write it all out. Usually by the time I press "post now" the anxiety is gone. And over time, maybe even after your first one you can kind of point out triggers and such and you can work on them. Ummm. That's all the suggestions I have. I hope this helped you somehow, just know that you aren't alone.

[newman21]

I know exactly how you feel.

Until now, I havent read a post that had mentioned nicotene withdrawl. I had my first panic attack a few years ago, but it stayed with me for a while. It has a tendancy to stay with me for 4 - 6 weeks before dying down again. Anyway I had one 3 weeks ago and 3 days afterwards I quit smoking (I had planned to quit earlier) and my mood is all over the place. I just get so down and feel like I could cry for no reason at all. Then I'll just feel so hopeless, like there's no help for me and I'll feel like this forever.
since finding this site, I feel alot better. The weird thing for me was that although I was craving to smoke, I was more worried about my anxiety that it kept my mind off smoking most of the time. Smoking is my way (and yours presumably) of dealing with stress. we used to have that ritual that we could escape to if we were really stressed. Now we dont have it anymore so we have to find another way to destress I suppose. Some people get angry some people get irritable, and some people get anxious. It's your mind telling you it wants a cig.

You've done it for 3 weeks now, same here, let's keep up the good work yeah?

[newman21]

forgot to mention,

Exercise helps HEAPS. I exercise 5 days a week for at least 20 to 30 minutes (jogging, swimming, anything to keep the heart rate up) and my negative thoughts and worries cant touch me afterwards, it also makes you glad you dont smoke.

[danstelter]

It seems like you are biologically wired to have a fairly significant level of anxiety in your life, so don't really feel bad about the way you are feeling. What you do to solve your anxiety is up to you, but I will present you some options.

First, what newman21 said about exercise is spot on...get regular exercise because it reduces anxiety a ton! What I've also learned is that when you do many things to reduce anxiety such as exercising, avoiding anxiety-causing foods (caffeine, alcohol etc...), seeking counseling (very helpful for me), talking to friends to get it out when you need to, and using medication, you will find that all these factors add up to help reduce your anxiety.

My personal choice is to avoid medication at almost all costs because who knows what it is doing to you...there are side effects both short and long term for all medicines, some of which can be very harmful. But, I did take medication (10 mg of Lexapro for a year), and I did find it helpful. You can regulate your anxiety without medication, but if it is just too intense, medication can be a good idea in the short term, and then you can go off of it later on in life when you have your anxiety under better control.

It's all up to you how you decide to take care of your anxiety, but what I metnioned earlier does help everyone to some degree. Good luck and let me know if you have further questions!

[lindsayarmstrong1]

thanks for your reply's everyone,

Today is a much better day. I am completely on the ball today and not experiencing any anxiety. I absolutely cannot believe the physical symptoms anxiety caused me yesterday, i was starting to think i had a flu or something. When my boyfriend came over later and i was just relaxing with him, my stomache stopped hurting and slowly my body returned to its regular state as i began to relax. I have not had the slightest ache or pain today, unreal.

I really appreciate everyones suggestions and have decided to take them seriously. I have been cutting out the junk food slowly over the last couple of months and am doing pretty well sticking to a more balanced diet. The suggestion about working out is a great one and i am actually heading to the gym after i am finished this post.

I am nervous for tonight. I am scared that when i get into bed the anxiety monster is going to creep up on me again.

It feels so good to know that other people have experienced similar things. I think that this forum has already helped me a lot.

Thanks again

[Al Tidag]

Glad you had a better day. I have had a lifetime of dealing with anxiety and panic (I am in my fifties). One thing I have noticed is that it all comes in waves. If there are several bad days, chances are they will be followed by an easier period. This may prove to be true for you. During the bad days it helps just to accept that you're feeling anxious due to something that is not your fault and will pass. I agree with the others that exercise is crucial. For me, meditation has been an essential aid. There are many forms of meditation in the world to choose from. Some may be attached to a religion or philosophy such as Buddhism, some are entirely secular. But what they all do is interrupt the anxiety cycle and, more important, train the mind to do so throughout the day. Best of luck

[ThePhoenix]

I can definately relate too, especially to people telling you just not to worry about it. Like you can just flick a switch and turn it off, they dont understand how all consuming it can be. People have told me that so many times and even get annoyed at me for focusing on it but at times one just cant help it, you sort of need to process it in your own time!