View Full Version : hey im new
03-02-2006, 03:40 PM
Im 20 years old and have been suffering from what i thought was depression, anxiety for 6 months. have been on and am currently on medication for this.
It was only recently i realised i may not be depressed but have social anxiety, i have always had trouble with public speaking, in that i would do anything to avoid it. usually ending in tears even through highschool. am getting to the end of my teather with it!!!! as it holds me back from doing things i love.and from meeting interesting people. had an incident recently where i went to my bf's house only to walk into a room of strangers , i panicked didnt say anything, and sat behind the couch trying to hide, and holding back my tears all night. couldnt explain what happened...i just freaked out.
anyone else with similar probs????? is there a cure, i dont want to live like this!!! :unsure:
03-02-2006, 08:52 PM
Hello Runnagal and welcome to the Forum. I'm sorry to hear you're having a hard time :( .
I can really relate to some of the things you mentioned. I have social phobia, but I'm soooo much better now. I know what it feels like to walk into a room full of strangers and have a feeling of dreaded doom come over you, and you just want to become invisable, shrink away, or run.
People who have anxiety commonly have depression; it sorta goes hand in hand because having anxiety takes a lot of good out of your body and your life. As for being socially phobic, I think it may be a possibility. I was the extreme case of social phobia because I didn't get the help I needed for a long time and suffered panic attacks every day, not everyone is like that. There are different degrees of social anxiety and it is curable and you do not have to live like this!
For anyone who is experiencing anxiety, I highly recommend therapy - especially cognitive behavioral therapy (cbt) on a weekly basis. It teaches how to overcome anxiety and fear. Are you seeing a therapist?
For me, I needed medication along with cbt and it has worked extremely well for me. I take an SSRI (Paxil) everynight and a benzodiazepine (Klonopin) on a as-needed basis. Has your medication helped with the anxiety and depression?
Are there any other social situations that make you uneasy, like eating out, standing in line, etc..?
You will be ok. You're on the right track by seeking help and advice. You can overcome this :) !
Hope to see you back soon!
03-03-2006, 06:34 AM
hey thanks for youre reply...
i was seeing a councellor but didnt find it too helpful, maybe i didnt give it a good enough go, maybe it was that particular councellor i felt uncomfortable around her because i felt i made her uncomfortable..and that what i was saying was crazy..
i think initially the medication (paxil) helped in that it got me out of bed every day, but after a few months i was sick of the tiredness i felt and sweating it gave me..as an athlete having muscle fatigue didnt help...i wanted to get off medication as i felt it was holding me back or i was using it as an excuse so now am on prosac i think....which makes me quite anxious....
other situations i find that make me nervous,,,are the obvious public speaking, i would do anything to avoid most situations where this is a reality, iincluding deciding what to do at uni based on whether or not i think there will be seminars involved to do to the class!! ridiculous i know... also there was a stage i couldnt go to a new gym because i was afraid people were staring and would be judging me because i was new and didnt know where everything was,, have got over this with the help of a friend who came with me, helped to have someone else there to have eyes on...(well this made sense in my own head anyway!!) even family social situations i can struggle with sometimes, as a young girl i would always stand next to my mum and have her there to help me, phoning people sometimes is a problem, there are a lot of day to day situations where i close up . when i am around my friends i am fine and am quite a loud fun person but the moment there is a bigger group and i dont know many people i have trouble. people have said that whenthey first met me they found me intimidating or hard to talk to or that they were scared to talk to me, i find this crazy because in my head i am so afraid to talk to them!i really want to change and i battle withmyself in my head when in the situation and sit there and beat myself up about it,which makes me totally lack any confidence in myself..
phewww i dont know where this problem came from but now that i think about it , i feel it has been with me since i was little. i have always acheived highly in sport and other areas and got to a point where i felt people were knocking me for being an over ahcheiver so it seems now i dont try as much for fear of standing out or being something people are jealous of, as i have had this in the past.
also i have recently noticed that i find myself judging people myself or thinking things about them, they must be this type of person or that type of person, it isnt negative thoughts ususally. i use this as a defense mechanism i think incase i am also being judged
sorry for the novel
03-03-2006, 08:15 AM
Hey there, Runnagal. Gosh, we really do have a lot in common!
My social anxiety started when I was a kid, but as I hit my teen years it became more difficult to do things. I felt judged at school and college especially when I did well. I felt as if the other students thought I was stuckup or weird, and I have been called stuckup and difficult at first to get to know, as I found out later from friends telling me. You mentioned judging people as a defense mechanism, I do that too. I've learned that people with social anxiety commonly do this because we are so worried about what people think of us. I still "study" people to see what they're like before I engage any further. I think I do this to keep myself safe from scrutiny.
As for the counselor, maybe she is not familiar with social anxiety and that's why you got that vibe from her. I still think it is important to get cbt. I would interview a therapist by asking if they have or have had patients with social anxiety. My first therapist, I had to actually tell her about social anxiety! This was a long time ago, I'm over thirty now. I soon after found a therapist that could educate me and it worked very well. You learned to change you're thought pattern from negative to positive.
Sorry the Paxil didn't work for you. I know what you mean about the tiredness and sweating. I like to run/jog and my body took time to adjust. I still drink a lot of water! I take 60mgs everynight. I've never tried Prozac. I started off with 20mgs Paxil and found relief right away though droggy. I've been on Paxil for years so the sleepiness is not a factor anymore; my body has adjusted. I have some friends who only take 20 or 30mgs and they are doing very well. They also take a benzodiazepine (Klonopin) on a as-needed basis. It does help to take a benzo if anxiety increases and you cannot calm down or if you are going into a situation that might make you anxious or scared.
Educate yourself as much as possible about anxiety and about social anxiety disorder. It helps to understand what your mind and body is doing during panic, and you will learn that you are not alone in this and that you are not crazy; but, most of all you will learn how to get over this. On this forum under Articles & Resourcces there is a post named Anxiety & Mood Disorder Lists. It is very helpful. Here is the section for Social Anxiety:
SocialAnxietyDisorder.NET (from the creator of AnxietyForum)
Wikipedia - Social Anxiety:
AAFP - Social Anxiety Disorder:
Take a look at these sites. Also, try to pick up some books on social anxiety. I've yet to get it, but I've heard good things about a book called "Diagonally Parked in a Parallel Universe."
I know right now you are very scared, but you are going to be ok. This is going to pass. You are so young, and these days social phobia is more understood and recognized by doctors and therapists so that people do not have to suffer; and as you search you will find so much help and advice out there about social anxiety as you did here :) ! There are other people on this forum with social anxiety and they also know exactly what you are going through.
Don't ever worry about posting too much. As you can see, I don't!
Let us know how things are going. I'm thinking about you and sending you calming thoughts :console: ,
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