salekt
06-07-2009, 04:50 PM
I am 19 years old and a male. I have been having a really hard time the past 5 days. 5 days ago I was messing around with some chemicals trying to make paint/ink mixes. I opened a can of Hercules Purple PVC Primer that I wanted to add to a mix of things I had, and once I opened it, I couldn't get it closed no matter what I did and I was not in a well ventilated area. I quickly poured it into another container I had and closed that, then I left the area and disposed of the can. I noticed that the can had some scary warnings written on it which I found online:
"Severe overexposure can cause headache, dizziness, and narcosis. Will cause irritation of mucous membranes, nose, and throat; coughing, difficulty of breathing."
After reading this I started feeling very anxious and panicky and I felt like it was hard to breath. I ended up taking a nap and waking up feeling better. I went out that night and hung out with a few friends. I still felt a little jumpy, but nothing too bad. I slept fine that night.
The next day I still felt my chest was feeling little tight, but it didn't bother me too much. I went out that day with a diesel pickup truck and apparently there was something wrong with the truck because it was flooding diesel exhaust fumes into the cabin and I had to breath that in for a while. After this I have felt like its very hard to breath and I have also become obsessed with my breathing patterns. I can't stop thinking about my breathing and it feels like I am forcing my self to breath instead of it being automatic. I keep telling myself there is nothing wrong with me and that even if I stop breathing, my body will automatically start breathing when I pass out but none of that is helping.
The third day I still felt like I couldn't breath and I couldn't take my mind off of my breathing pattern. I made plans with my friends hoping I could go out and get my mind off of things and go back to normal, but I couldn't. I got in the car and started driving to meet my friend. The farther I got away from my home, the worse I felt. I kept getting more and more panicky and it felt like it was getting harder and harder to breath. I slept fine that night, too.
The fourth day I tried going out again and the same thing happened. I ended up going back home and breaking down crying to my mother. I couldn't stop crying. I was crying about how I am unable to leave the house, felling "out of it" like I am not myself anymore, and how lonely I felt because I am stuck in my house. I also kept crying because I really missed my ex girlfriend. She always helped me when I was having anxiety attacks in the past and she is currently on vacation and will not be back for 10 days. I got over the crying, but still felt like it was difficult to breath and I still had the out of it, I don't feel like myself feeling. I ended up going out that night to the grocery store alone just to see if I can do it. I was able to do it, but the whole time I felt scared in the pit of my stomach and it felt hard to breath. I sleft fine that night too.
The fifth day, today, I am just feeling very depressed and anxious. And it feels very hard to breath. I don't feel like I am myself anymore and I don't know what the do. I can't tell if I actually can't breath, or if I am just forcing myself to believe I can't breath. No matter what I do to distract myself, I can't get my mind off of the tightness in my chest. I am very depressed because of the fact I can not go out and enjoy myself and that I have to be in constant fear. I am so scared that this feeling will not go away. I have had anxiety/panic attacks before, but never for such a long period of time. I have never taken any medication for my anxiety or talked to a psychologist. I used to be mildly agoraphobic, but never this bad. I would just be afraid to go on vacations without my parents.
Sorry for such a long post. I hope it is easy to understand. I am very scared and depressed and I don't know what to do. Please help.
...
Another thing I forgot to mention is that at night, I seem to be a little more relaxed for some reason. I don't know what this means but I feel a little more relaxed once it gets later. I also feel okay right when I wake up, but once I get out of bed the panic and breathing problems start again. I feel like I'm going crazy.
Another thing. I am looking for help on how to find a good therapist to go to. I am not sure how to go about findind a good therapist in my area (northern virginia). I think I am in need of a phsycologist as I am just looking for seeking help through talking and things like that. I don't really want to take medication unless it is absolutely necessary.
"Severe overexposure can cause headache, dizziness, and narcosis. Will cause irritation of mucous membranes, nose, and throat; coughing, difficulty of breathing."
After reading this I started feeling very anxious and panicky and I felt like it was hard to breath. I ended up taking a nap and waking up feeling better. I went out that night and hung out with a few friends. I still felt a little jumpy, but nothing too bad. I slept fine that night.
The next day I still felt my chest was feeling little tight, but it didn't bother me too much. I went out that day with a diesel pickup truck and apparently there was something wrong with the truck because it was flooding diesel exhaust fumes into the cabin and I had to breath that in for a while. After this I have felt like its very hard to breath and I have also become obsessed with my breathing patterns. I can't stop thinking about my breathing and it feels like I am forcing my self to breath instead of it being automatic. I keep telling myself there is nothing wrong with me and that even if I stop breathing, my body will automatically start breathing when I pass out but none of that is helping.
The third day I still felt like I couldn't breath and I couldn't take my mind off of my breathing pattern. I made plans with my friends hoping I could go out and get my mind off of things and go back to normal, but I couldn't. I got in the car and started driving to meet my friend. The farther I got away from my home, the worse I felt. I kept getting more and more panicky and it felt like it was getting harder and harder to breath. I slept fine that night, too.
The fourth day I tried going out again and the same thing happened. I ended up going back home and breaking down crying to my mother. I couldn't stop crying. I was crying about how I am unable to leave the house, felling "out of it" like I am not myself anymore, and how lonely I felt because I am stuck in my house. I also kept crying because I really missed my ex girlfriend. She always helped me when I was having anxiety attacks in the past and she is currently on vacation and will not be back for 10 days. I got over the crying, but still felt like it was difficult to breath and I still had the out of it, I don't feel like myself feeling. I ended up going out that night to the grocery store alone just to see if I can do it. I was able to do it, but the whole time I felt scared in the pit of my stomach and it felt hard to breath. I sleft fine that night too.
The fifth day, today, I am just feeling very depressed and anxious. And it feels very hard to breath. I don't feel like I am myself anymore and I don't know what the do. I can't tell if I actually can't breath, or if I am just forcing myself to believe I can't breath. No matter what I do to distract myself, I can't get my mind off of the tightness in my chest. I am very depressed because of the fact I can not go out and enjoy myself and that I have to be in constant fear. I am so scared that this feeling will not go away. I have had anxiety/panic attacks before, but never for such a long period of time. I have never taken any medication for my anxiety or talked to a psychologist. I used to be mildly agoraphobic, but never this bad. I would just be afraid to go on vacations without my parents.
Sorry for such a long post. I hope it is easy to understand. I am very scared and depressed and I don't know what to do. Please help.
...
Another thing I forgot to mention is that at night, I seem to be a little more relaxed for some reason. I don't know what this means but I feel a little more relaxed once it gets later. I also feel okay right when I wake up, but once I get out of bed the panic and breathing problems start again. I feel like I'm going crazy.
Another thing. I am looking for help on how to find a good therapist to go to. I am not sure how to go about findind a good therapist in my area (northern virginia). I think I am in need of a phsycologist as I am just looking for seeking help through talking and things like that. I don't really want to take medication unless it is absolutely necessary.